Ready Player One

Art3mis: As far as you know.

 

Parzival: OK. What’s your favorite movie? Of all time?

 

Art3mis: It changes. Right now? Probably Highlander.

 

Parzival: You’ve got great taste, lady.

 

Art3mis: I know. I have a thing for evil bald bad guys. The Kurgan is too sexy.

 

Parzival: I’m going to shave my head right now. And start wearing leather.

 

Art3mis: Send photos. Listen, I gotta go in a few minutes, Romeo. You can ask me one last question. Then I need to get some sleep.

 

Parzival: When can we chat again?

 

Art3mis: After one of us finds the egg.

 

Parzival: That could take years.

 

Art3mis: So be it.

 

Parzival: Can I at least keep e-mailing you?

 

Art3mis: Not a good idea.

 

Parzival: You can’t stop me from e-mailing you.

 

Art3mis: Actually, I can. I can block you on my contact list.

 

Parzival: You wouldn’t do that, though. Would you?

 

Art3mis: Not if you don’t force me to.

 

Parzival: Harsh. Unnecessarily harsh.

 

Art3mis: Good night, Parzival.

 

Parzival: Farewell, Art3mis. Sweet dreams.

 

chatlog ends. 2.27.2045–02:51:38 OST

 

 

 

 

 

I started e-mailing her. At first I showed restraint and only wrote her once a week. To my surprise, she never failed to respond. Usually it was with just a single sentence, saying she was too busy to reply. But her replies eventually got longer and we began to correspond. A few times a week at first. Then, as our e-mails grew longer and more personal, we started writing each other at least once a day. Sometimes more. Whenever an e-mail from her arrived in my inbox, I dropped everything to read it.

 

Before long, we were meeting in private chat-room sessions at least once a day. We played vintage board games, watched movies, and listened to music. We talked for hours. Long, rambling conversations about everything under the sun. Spending time with her was intoxicating. We seemed to have everything in common. We shared the same interests. We were driven by the same goal. She got all of my jokes. She made me laugh. She made me think. She changed the way I saw the world. I’d never had such a powerful, immediate connection with another human being before. Not even with Aech.

 

I no longer cared that we were supposed to be rivals, and she didn’t seem to either. We began to share details about our research. We told each other what movies we were currently watching and what books we were reading. We even began to exchange theories and to discuss our interpretations of specific passages in the Almanac. I couldn’t make myself be cautious around her. A little voice in my head kept trying to tell me that every word she said could be disinformation and that she might just be playing me for a fool. But I didn’t believe it. I trusted her, even though I had every reason not to.

 

I graduated from high school in early June. I didn’t attend the graduation ceremony. I’d stopped attending classes altogether when I fled the stacks. As far as I knew, the Sixers thought I was dead, and I didn’t want to tip them off by showing up for my last few weeks of school. Missing finals week wasn’t a big deal, since I already had more than enough credits to receive my diploma. The school e-mailed a copy of it to me. They snail-mailed the actual diploma to my address in the stacks, which no longer existed, so I don’t know what became of it.

 

When I finished school, I’d intended to devote all of my time to the Hunt. But all I really wanted to do was spend time with Art3mis.

 

 

 

 

 

When I wasn’t hanging out with my new online pseudo-girlfriend, I devoted the rest of my time to leveling up my avatar. Gunters called this “making the climb to ninety-nine,” because ninety-ninth level was the maximum power level an avatar could attain. Art3mis and Aech had both recently done it, and I felt compelled to catch up. It actually didn’t take me very long. I now had nothing but free time, and I had the money and the means to fully explore the OASIS. So I began to complete every quest I could find, sometimes jumping five or six levels in one day. I became a split-class Warrior/Mage. As my stats continued to increase, I honed my avatar’s combat and spell-casting abilities while collecting a wide array of powerful weapons, magic items, and vehicles.

 

Art3mis and I even teamed up for a few quests. We visited the planet Goondocks and finished the entire Goonies quest in just one day. Arty played through it as Martha Plimpton’s character, Stef, while I played as Mikey, Sean Astin’s character. It was entirely too much fun.

 

I didn’t spend all of my time goofing off. I tried to keep my head in the game. Really I did. At least once a day, I would pull up the Quatrain and try once again to decipher its meaning.

 

The captain conceals the Jade Key

 

in a dwelling long neglected

 

But you can only blow the whistle

 

once the trophies are all collected

 

 

 

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