42.
I sank onto the couch, clutching Jag’s letter and trying to organize my thoughts. I knew one thing: I didn’t want to open the envelope, didn’t want to experience him leaving me all over again. I took a long, deep breath and blew it out.
“Well, I’ll be downstairs.” Jake stood in the doorway, holding his bag of tech. “Come see me after you’ve read that note.”
I nodded, but as soon as he’d gone, I shoved the paper in my back pocket. I stumbled into the bathroom, staring at my drawn face in the mirror.
Ty had said, You have what you need to decide.
I could still hear Jake saying, He found you.
And Jag said he’d never leave you, Dad mocked, his voice inserted into my thoughts.
Shut up! I screamed. I looked at myself with my newly colored skin and yellow short-sleeved shirt. Even the blue jeans I wore weren’t mine. I hardly recognized the girl staring back at me.
I wasn’t good.
But I wasn’t bad either.
Those labels meant nothing.
I am Violet Schoenfeld. Armed with this knowledge, I grabbed my backpack and left my room. I found Jake sitting at the kitchen table. “Hey, where did Jag go?”
Jake glanced up. “I don’t know.”
“Big fat liar,” I accused, glaring at him. “I know you talked to him before he left. Where did he go?”
Jake squeezed his eyes shut. “You’re gonna be so mad. You know that, right?”
“Tell me,” I said.
“He went through the tunnels.” The answer came too quick. Because I’d controlled him.
I toned my emotions down. “Tunnels?”
“And he made me program the simulator with the most advanced profile we’ve got.” He clenched his hands into fists.
“So . . . I don’t get it.”
Jake stood up, wiping one hand across his eyes. “Just come with me. You’ll see.” He started toward the stairs. But he didn’t go up. Instead, he stopped in front of a blank wall.
“Okay, so you’re gonna want to kill me. Before we go down, promise me you won’t try to kill me.”
I scoffed. “Come on. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“You might. I’ve heard stories about you. Promise me.”
“Stories about me? What kind of stories? Jake—”
“Just promise.”
“Fine. I promise I won’t hurt you.”
“No, promise me you won’t even try to hurt me.”
I wanted to hurt him already. “I promise I won’t even try to hurt you.”
Satisfied, he turned back to the wall. I thought it would be the perfect time to elbow him in the gut, but I’d already made the stupid promise.
Jake tapped his fingers on the bare wall as if on a keypad. I frowned—until the wall vanished.
A staircase spiraled down into darkness.
Jake stepped into the shadows without speaking, like it was no biggie that he was moving into the great black abyss.
It was a big deal to me. “Um, Jake?” The murkiness had already swallowed him.
“Come on.” His voice echoed off the stone stairway.
“I can’t see.”
“Feel,” he called. And with that comment, Jake shot to the top of my To-Die List, with Jag in slot number two.
But I tentatively reached toward the railing. The metal felt icy, slippery. I edged my feet along the two steps I could see and then threw caution to the wind.
I descended farther and farther into darkness. I couldn’t hear Jake in front of me. The steps simply went on and on, around and around. My breathing grew more rapid as the air turned colder.
Tech buzzed in my brain. I forced my foot down one more step. Then another. And another.
Now the tech burned. I leaned against the wall, relishing the bite of cool metal from the railing.
Step after agonizing step, I continued down the stairs. Until I couldn’t anymore.
The darkness swirled. Tears stung my eyes. The air felt like cement.
“Jake?” I called. “I can’t . . .”
Footsteps approached. A light bounced on the walls before blinding me further. “You coming? Don’t tell me you’re afraid. Jag said you don’t get scared. He called you tough.”
I couldn’t recall a single time I’d been tough in front of Jag. But it didn’t matter. Only breathing mattered.
“What’s the deal?” he asked.
“Can’t—breathe—tech,” I stammered.
“Oh! Right.” Jake dug in his pocket. “Sorry. Here.” He held three purple pills in his hand. I blinked, and the three pills blended into one.
“What’s that?”
“For the tech buzz. I guess you have some kind of heightened sense.”
You could call it that. I reached for the pill and missed it completely.
“Here, sit.” Jake helped me to the ground and placed the pill in my hand. “Swallow.”
I didn’t. I couldn’t put my thoughts together. Taking a pill to control the techtricity seemed weird, though.
“Come on, Vi. It’ll take the buzz away. I invented them for Ty.”
“But I need the buzz,” I slurred. “That’s how I know if it’s safe or not.”
He scoffed and moved within inches of my face. His eyes shone with light, deep and golden like fresh honey. “You don’t need to feel the stupid buzz. You have a brain. Use it.”
Against my better judgment, I popped the purple pill in my mouth and swallowed hard against the taste of ash and plastic. Almost instantly, the tech buzz faded.
Unfortunately, so did the light. Jake had turned and was already rounding the bend.
I resumed my downward spiral. Eventually the darkness lightened to gray.
Finally my foot landed on something besides stone. Jake sat at a counter in the back of a warehouse. A light shone over him in a pale yellow halo. I moved through the tech-stocked shelves to where he worked.
He didn’t look up. “Take what you want,” he said, gesturing to the aisles of tech.
“For what?” I didn’t want any of it.
“You never know what you’ll find in the simulator,” Jake said. He wouldn’t look directly at me. “Go on, take whatever you want.”
A tiny alarm was ringing in my head. I wondered why I’d need any of this stuff for a simulation.
But I sighed and wished the room was brighter. Instantly the light increased. Jake snorted behind me. I ignored him as I turned my attention to the tech. It didn’t look like anything I’d ever seen. Thankfully, each had a label with a name and a description.
Locator: helps find a person who’s been lost.
That would’ve been nice three years ago when Ty went missing. Or when my dad disappeared. Maybe if I couldn’t find Jag, this locator would help.
Not much bigger than the palm of my hand, the square of metal had a narrow screen along the top. A blinking red light told me the locator came equipped with an iris recognizer.
Further down the row, next to a spiky piece of tech that could drill a hole fifteen feet down, lay a bracelet.
Diminisher: reduces visibility so enemies can’t see you. Warning: takes several hours to come back to full sight.
Nice. The diminishing bracelet joined the locator in my pocket.
I passed by the tech that turned skin green. I also left the spinning whirlwind and the shock spit on the shelf.
“Subtle weaponry,” Jake murmured from the back. I almost told him I didn’t need any weaponry, but I kept my mouth shut.
I wandered up one row and down another. Nothing else seemed important enough to take, because I didn’t know what to prepare for. “I’m ready,” I announced.
Jake stood and moved toward a corridor in the corner. “All right,” he said, like I was anything but ready. “You need to get to the center of the city, where I’ve installed some wicked tech that scrambles directional devices.”
He paused, like I should congratulate him on his achievements. I didn’t.
“Okay, now here’s the part where you’re gonna be mad. Are you ready?”
“To be mad?” I tightened the straps on my backpack. “Totally ready.”
Jake smiled. Then he did a most surprising thing. He pulled me into a bone-crushing hug. “Be careful, Vi,” he whispered. “You’re our only hope.”
I wanted to ask him what he meant, but I couldn’t.
Because in the next moment, he disappeared.
My arms hovered in the air where Jake had stood. I surveyed the tech warehouse. Empty.
When I turned back to the hallway in front of me, Jake stood there. Well, a projection of him.
“Vi, you must decide how you will use your power,” the projection said. “This is the crucial decision all mind rangers face. If you don’t decide, you can be easily swayed by others, especially others like you.”
The simulation tech waited, as if it knew I had to think about what he’d said.
I still didn’t know what to do. Zenn needed me. If he wasn’t being brainwashed, he’d choose freedom, he’d choose me. I could help him live that uncontrolled life.
I needed Jag like I needed oxygen. But he’d ditched me so many times.
The ache for my dad was also strong. The image of our family—complete with Ty and both my parents—flashed behind my eyes. Maybe that dream could still come true.
No matter what, my talent would not be ignored. I had a duty to use it, to help others—not just when it was convenient for me. But Ty had said there were degrees of control. I could use my power for the Association or file a petition and stay in Seaside.
Minutes passed. The projection of Jake waited, his eyes fixed on me.
My conversation with Jag finally reminded me of my choice. I’ll never control anyone, not even you.
I couldn’t use my control to Direct. I would use it to help others, but I would not brainwash them into living according to my will.
“I’m ready,” I said.
The projection of Jake smiled. “Your training continues, then. Remember the things Jag’s told you, no matter how small, and you’ll find what you need. Good luck.”
He pointed down the hallway, as if that were adequate instructions for my next task.