My Soul to Keep

CHAPTER 26



“Push me higher!”

I laughed at Jessie. “If I push you any higher, you’re going to fly off!”

“I don’t care! Right now I feel like I could fly,” she called back over her shoulder.

“But if I’m behind you, I can’t catch you,” I said quickly as she flew back for another push.

I watched her kick her legs up as she reached the top of her swing and as she came down she dragged them along the ground. I grabbed the chains, figuring she wanted off.

“Thanks,” she said.

She stood and waited for me to come around the swing. I took her hand and she held me tight. “What do you want to do next?”

“Monkey bars!”

I laughed again. “As you wish.”

“I’m kidding, silly. I’m actually kind of tired. Can we sit for a while?”

I gave her a worried look she couldn’t see, but I spotted an empty picnic table across the park. “Come on. Follow me.”

I led her through the mulch. She took higher steps to keep it out of her sandals. How her toes hadn’t frozen off I’d never know.

“Aren’t you cold?”

“No, not really. I’ve got you to keep me warm.”

I didn’t buy it. I was a Fallen and the November winds were making me cold. I pulled my arm out of her hands, ignored her squeak of protest, threw it around her shoulders, and used my other arm to pick her up. “Better?”

“Much,” she said and blushed. Her blush didn’t stop her from burying her face in my neck as I cradled her. “I’m not too heavy am I?”

“Ha! Watch.” I jumped. She gasped as she felt us leave the ground and land again. “See, not heavy at all.”

A strange look crossed her face and she shook her head. “I guess not. Just do me a favor. Don’t do that again.” She kissed me. Her method of persuasion worked. I vowed silently never to do it again.

“As you wish,” I said again.

“You keep saying that. It sounds familiar…”

“You keep using that word, I don’t think it means what you think it means!”

“Oh, my God! I loved that movie. I haven’t seen it since I was a little kid,” she said and sighed.

“It’s my parent’s favorite movie. I’ve probably seen it more than…well I can’t think of anything right now, but I’ve seen it a whole lot. I could probably sit down and write out the whole script if I had to.”

“Farmboy, kiss me.”

“As you wish,” I said and did. We had reached the table, but I didn’t want to let her go. Ever.

Finally, common decency demanded we stop. By common decency I meant the old lady walking her poodle. She gave me a dirty look when I looked up and went, “Hehem.”

I think I blushed. “You want to sit?”

“On your lap.”

“Deal.”

We sat down. We didn’t talk. We didn’t laugh. I leaned back against the table and Jess leaned back against me. I held her for an hour that felt like days. She fell asleep after twenty minutes, but I didn’t care. I put my cheek against hers and listened to her breathe and I listened to her heart. Tears rolled down my cheeks, both of happiness and sadness. I couldn’t have been happier doing anything else in the world. Not knowing how long I would be able to hold her made my heart ache.

“I love you,” I whispered in her ear for the very first time.

She smiled in her sleep and said, “Love.”

* * *

“I can’t believe you let me sleep that long!”

We had walked the entire way and were almost back to my house. “Well, you looked really comfortable. I was, too.”

“You’re pretty sweet, Connor Sullivan. Anybody ever tell you that?”

“Only you. Everybody else thinks I’m icky.”

“Yeah, right.”

“Seriously, nobody else has ever paid attention to me, let alone told me I’m sweet.”

“Well, I know for a fact Claire thinks you’re sweet. I think she’s a little sweet on you, too.”

“Huh?”

“Oh, don’t be such a boy. Claire likes you. A lot if you ask me.”

“Claire can barely stand to be in the same room as me.”

“Whatever you’ve got to tell yourself to sleep at night.”

“Okay, I’m confused. Why would you think she likes me?”

Jess stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and pulled my arm to get me to stop too. “You think she drives you to school every day because she likes to make fun of you? Do you think she got her father to rent a limo for you to torment you? Besides, I can hear it in her voice when she talks to you. I’m not the only one who’s totally into you.”

I opened my mouth to say something. Anything. Nothing came out. “I…I…”

“You’re a boy. Unless a girl ties a note to a brick and throws it at your head you’re pretty oblivious to the whole subtle hint thing. It’s not your fault.”

“You don’t mind?” I tried to keep the suspicion out of my voice.

“Very much. It’s why I’m keeping an eye on her. The question is do you like her?”

“Honestly, because I promised I’d never lie to you, I do. But not like you think. Claire has helped me through a lot of problems, but I don’t want to date her. Claire is the sister I wish I had been born with. She’s really cool, really helpful, but not for me. Know what I mean?”

“Exactly. I trust you. I trust her to a certain point. We’re good. Do you think she’s pretty?”

“Very, but nowhere near as beautiful as you.”

“Damn good answer.”

“It’s the only answer.”

That earned me another kiss. We walked the rest of the way to my house just holding hands. Nothing else needed to be said. Until we reached my door. “I love you,” I whispered out of the corner of my mouth.

“I love you, too,” she said back without hesitating. I couldn't help but smile.

That’s when the shiny metal blade exploded through my chest. I looked down at it, covered in my own blood, and watched the blackness as it filled my vision. My last thought was trying to concentrate on Jessie’s terror filled scream as someone, or something, dragged her off.