Alien in the House

Chapter 38



“PEOPLE SAY THAT TO US A LOT.” And they were usually right. However, I had BFFs to find. “Can you talk and walk at the same time, Vance?”

He shot me a very snide look. “At least as well as you can.”

“So you claim. Okay, before we let Vance roll his theory, let’s determine where we’re going.” I led the others outside to the Zoo’s lovely circular driveway.

The Zoo was on the curving corner of Sheridan Circle. I stood pretty much where the van had been and faced the way its doors had opened.

I hadn’t really paid attention earlier, in part because I was distracted by murder and mayhem, and in part because they’d been up for weeks now, but the Christmas lights on the trees in Sheridan Circle and on most of the buildings within view were quite pretty. No one was really overdoing it in this part of town, so most of the lights were white and sparkling. Ireland was the lone exception—they had green lights interspersed with white. All in all, the scene was quite beautiful; a sharp contrast to all that had been going on.

“Why are we here?” Vance asked, interrupting my perusal of the external decor.

“The bullet that shot Eugene came from that way,” I pointed to the Circle. “Meaning that vantage point was taken. So, if you were going to be somewhere that would allow you to protect someone standing where I am, where would you go to perch?”

Everyone looked around. “We’re looking up high, Missus Martini?”

“Yes, Mister White, we are.”

“Assassins like the high ground,” Vance said.

“Vance, you have hidden depths.”

“I keep on telling you that. It’s hard to see, but if I was trying to cover everything, honestly, I’d be on top of the building we were just in. Gives you the best vantage point for the whole area. Your Embassy is taller, but it’s also a lot farther away from the action. And you don’t have any Christmas lights on either building, so it’s easier to hide in the shadows up there.”

“I agree,” Claudia said slowly. “Especially if they were trying to get someone here.”

“No, actually, they were planning to protect someone here.”

“Want to explain that?” Lorraine asked.

“Not at this precise time. So, okay, I can buy that who we’re looking for was on the roof of the Zoo. But how would Caroline or Amy have spotted anyone if they were on the roof?”

“Oh, I wouldn’t have just one man on the roof of the Zoo, Ambassador,” a man’s pleasant, and quite familiar voice said from behind me. “I’d have someone on top of Ireland’s Embassy, too, lovely green and white Christmas lights or no. Which they did.”

Spun around to see a tallish man with a full beard in an overcoat that, per usual, hid whether he was pudgy, muscular, or both. “Mister Joel Oliver! I’m so glad to see you.”

“And it’s always a pleasure to see you, Ambassador.” As he came nearer, I saw there was something on his shoulder. A shape I recognized. And didn’t care for.

Chose to ignore the shape and maybe it’d go away. Or just stay silent. “Jeff’s going to need to talk to you.”

“Jeff! Jeff! Jeff! Bellie wants treats!” Sure enough, the Parrot From Hell was along for the ride. My luck was always consistent.

“Hush, Miss Bellie. We’ll visit Jeff later. And I’ll be happy to give our nation’s newest representative any help I can.”

“Wow. You, as always, amaze.”

“I do what I can.”

“I think you know everyone here other than Va—”

“Vance Beaumont,” he said, cutting me off mid-word as he leaped over to offer his hand to Oliver. “I’m your biggest fan. Beautiful parrot, by the way.”

“Bellie likes Vance!”

“She is the biggest slut in the world, isn’t she?” I asked whoever was in charge of my luck.

Oliver seemed stunned. “I have a fan?”

“Lots, but I’m the biggest,” Vance said as he did indeed continue to act like the biggest fanboy in existence. “Your exposé on Titan Security should be required reading for all law enforcement and politicians. May I give your bird a treat?”

“Bellie likes Vance! Bellie wants treats!”

Oliver looked at me. “Is he for real?”

“Yes!” Vance said. “I can’t believe I get to work with Mister Joel Oliver!”

Claudia and Lorraine sidled closer to me. “Is he serious?” Lorraine asked quietly.

“He seems serious.” Seriously deranged.

“You find the most interesting people,” Claudia said carefully.

“Don’t I though? Yeah, um, Vance, let’s let go of the nice reporter and remember that we are in the middle of something big right now.”

“I can’t wait to tell you what’s going on,” Vance said to Oliver, clearly ignoring me. “You may have already put it together yourself, but haven’t had enough to go public.”

“I think we’re talking about different things,” Oliver said, shooting me the “help me, help me” look.

“Vance!”

He dragged his head around to sort of look at me. “Yes, Kitty?”

“Vance, I’m speaking as both the ambassador of the property we’re standing on and as someone who’s more than willing to kick you in any number of places. Let go of the nice reporter, back away, and focus. We are not on a field trip, he is not Steven Tyler or Joe Perry, and you are not twelve. Pull it together, dude, you’re embarrassing me in front of my cool friends.”

Somehow, this got through. Vance let go of Oliver and looked embarrassed. “I just really think he’s great,” he mumbled.

“I’m flattered,” Oliver said as he stepped closer to me and the girls. “Truly. However, as I was saying to the ambassador, I don’t believe the assassins on either your roof or Ireland’s are who shot Mister Montgomery.”

“They weren’t. Remember Operation Assassination?”

“As if it were yesterday.”

“Well, the assassin who got arrested is out and gunning for his wife’s killer.”

“Oh dear.” Oliver looked around. “I don’t see Mister Buchanan with you.”

“Yeah, we’re missing Malcolm, Christopher, Amy, Caroline, and someone I’ll tell you about when we’re not standing in the middle of the street, so to speak. Now, back to it—were you on Ireland’s roof?”

“Yes, investigating. I’d suggest that you didn’t need to verify for yourself, particularly since none of you are exactly dressed for scaling a building, but I know you and imagine you’ll want to see for yourselves.”

“MJO, is this you telling us we should investigate, or is this you being resigned that we’re going to waste time when you could just tell us what you found?”

“Ah, you’ve just come from spending time with the lovely Madam Olga?”

“Shockingly, no, I spared myself time in Remedial Class. But you and she do share some traits.”

“Well then, no, I’m not trying to be vague and secretive while making you really work for the information so you’ll remember it better the next time I’m not around to help out. I went up onto Ireland’s roof; I can tell someone was perched there for a while. He never fired a shot. And then he left. I was heading to look at the roof of this building when you came outside.”

“Super duper. I happen to know who was on top of that building, and therefore who was on top of the Zoo. However, I’d like to verify that we don’t have dead bodies on the roof.”

Oliver nodded. “It’s easiest to access the roof if we go inside.”

“It’s also easy to see us and ask why we aren’t powwowing with all the politicians.”

“We could use the fire escape,” Vance suggested, pointing to the metal ladder system that was on the side of the building where the walkway attached. The walkway was lit on the inside, and the glass meant it was very visible from the street. But that meant we could see well while climbing up cold, slippery, metal ladders.

“Now, see, that is why he’s coming with us,” I said to Lorraine and Claudia. They didn’t look convinced.

White went under the bottom of the fire escape and proved that white men could indeed jump. One leap and he had the bottom of the ladder. Easily. His weight brought the sliding portion down, and he held it in place.

“Mister White, you’re the man.”

“I felt the need to show off, Missus Martini. No one’s acted like I was important for at least a few minutes and my ego was getting terribly abused.”

“I’ll fawn over you some more in a bit. Who’s going first?”

“I’d like to,” Oliver said. “Chivalry and all that.”

“You got it.”

Oliver started up, then me, with Vance, Lorraine, and Claudia following, and White bringing up the rear. All of us other than Oliver were in evening dress. So much for not scaling buildings in our formalwear. Found myself hoping there were no other reporters hanging around.

Also found myself wondering why I’d been stupid enough to not take a coat. It wasn’t the coldest winter—we had no snow, for example—but it was still cold enough, and I wasn’t dressed for being outside. The few minutes I’d been out earlier I’d been inside the police van and preoccupied.

Vance and White were in suits, so they were probably fine, but by the time we reached the top, the girls and I were shivering. A-Cs originated on a world that had two suns, so they handled heat really well—to this day I’d never seen one of them sweat. Well, other than Jeff right before our wedding. However, cold was a different story.

“It’s freezing up here, so let’s make it snappy. MJO, do you see anything that says how many other people might have been up here, and where they went when they left, and Vance, do you want to share what the hell you think is going on?”

White started to take his jacket off, presumably to give it to one of us, but before he could, someone opened the door to the roof.

We all froze, literally and figuratively.