“I think…I think the moon goddess hates me.” Tears stung the backs of her eyes, and Charlotte cursed herself for being so weak. She couldn’t be crying, not when so many others were in worse positions and situations than she was. She should be grateful, and yet she couldn’t quite find the happiness she knew could be hers if she only gave in. Or maybe there wasn’t any happiness at all, and her world would continue to crumble.
Ellie sucked in a breath, taking a moment before she finally spoke. “I used to think that,” her mother said softly, surprising Charlotte. “About me, that is. That the moon goddess hated me. Then I found a purpose in fighting against the Centrals and found my Maddox, your father. I think that sometimes, fate and the scary world of mating and shifters takes you down a direction you never thought would be possible.” Ellie met her gaze and cupped Charlotte’s cheek. “I’m here if you want to discuss specifics. Or, I’m here only to listen. But know you’re never alone, Charlotte. Never.”
Charlotte closed her eyes and sighed. “I need to sort everything out before I can talk about it.”
Ellie just smiled and shook her head. “You know, some people do this thing called conversation to sort things out.”
She rolled her eyes at her mother’s words. “Yeah, well, I’ve never been one to take a shine to convention.” She leaned forward and kissed her mother’s cheek. “I need to go to the Talon den.” A pause. “I promised Walker I’d be there.”
She didn’t want anything to do with Shane, but her wolf calmed him, and the Talons needed her. While she hated to admit it, the idea that someone needed her for something touched a part of Charlotte that she did her best to ignore. Though no one had ever treated her like an outsider because of her birth, she’d always felt like a bit of one anyway. She’d never voiced her concerns, though she had a feeling her parents, and even Bram, had figured it out long ago anyway.
She didn’t have a title in the Pack, and for many wolves, that wouldn’t matter. Before the humans had found out about the existence of shifters, people in her position would merely find a job within the human realm and call the den home if that fit into their plans. Now, many of those employed outside the dens found themselves jobless and stuck within the wards until her Pack, as well as the other Packs in the country, figured out the next steps. She still trained with her cousins and other wolves because not doing so was a dangerous thing for a wolf, and she would fight alongside many of her fellow wolves during any hand-to-hand combat, but beyond that, she didn’t really have a role. It killed her that she had to sit on her hands and do nothing during many of the altercations. She knew it was her cousin Nick’s role as the new Beta of the Redwood Pack to ensure that she was comfortable and feeling needed, but she didn’t want to bother anyone. And she had always been good at hiding her feelings.
She’d had to learn early on, after all, since her father was the former Omega of the Pack, and his life dealt in feelings.
But now, the Talons needed her, and hopefully, that would lead to more responsibilities.
She said goodbye to her mother and headed to her vehicle so she could drive to the other den. Though there were underground tunnels, she wasn’t a fan of them since she couldn’t feel the breeze on her skin as easily. She’d been trapped in basements and other places when she was younger and didn’t want to relive that feeling if she could help it.
She’d lived through one nightmare, and now, her entire life was about not wanting to live another.
As soon as she walked into the infirmary behind Walker, her wolf nudged at her, scenting that spicy, masculine scent. Her mouth watered, and she had to keep from clamping her thighs together as she walked. Her body had only betrayed her like this with one other man, and she’d learned to somewhat curb those instincts around Bram.
She’d been with other men before Bram, as she was a healthy adult female and a shifter at that. She’d liked the comfort, and had always walked away from her lovers as friends. That was how all wolves worked. Shifters couldn’t form a mating bond without that sense of instinct between them, and unmated pairs couldn’t have children. She’d heard that a few times in the past, a mating bond had appeared much later in pairs whose human halves loved one another with devotion and intensity, but she hadn’t felt that type of connection with any of the men she’d been with.
Before Bram.
Though she’d always been best friends with Bram, it hadn’t been until they were older that their wolves had begun to sense there could be more to their relationship than friendship and attraction. She’d never had sex with Bram before that first intense sense of knowing, however, because she hadn’t wanted to ruin what they had. As soon as it became clear to them that they were potential mates, she’d thrown caution to the wind and slept with him.
It had been both the most intensely erotic and emotionally damaging night of her life.