Seth squeezed my hand. “Yeah, we’ll be out of town for a couple of days.”
I was the only one acting awkward about the whole situation and everyone else could tell. I wasn’t going to be Seth’s girlfriend for real or pretend to get a couple of Storm Chasers off his back. I didn’t like the feeling that I was being subtly manipulated into having a relationship with this dude because it would seem cute to go on a bunch of double dates with Helen and Roddy, and talk about how we’d be at home waiting while they were on the road. I hadn’t even gotten to know Seth yet, but suddenly my world was revolving around his, around his schedule, and what he wanted.
“Oh well, you boys enjoy your time on the road. I won’t be able to come tomorrow. I’m sorry.” I was trying to be gracious and not lead Seth on, but I thought the three of them were being ridiculously pushy.
“Why?” Helen said.
“Because I have plans, Helen.” My smile was gone and so was Seth’s. He was squinting at me, trying to read my expression while he still gripped my hand.
“What do you have to do on a Sunday, Charlie?” Helen raised her eyebrows.
“It’s okay,” Seth said, shaking his head. “There’s no pressure. It’s a long trip to make two days in a row.”
“Thank you.” I was sincere. I looked him in the eye. “I really appreciate that. My brother just moved in and we’re getting settled.”
“What? Chuck the Fuck moved in?” Helen shouted.
We were standing near the entry of the bar. We kept having to dance out of the way of passersby to talk to Helen and Roddy, who were now perched on barstools.
“Well, I told you I can’t make the rent on my own. Plus, he’s changed. Kind of. I mean, he’s still Chucky, but he’s grown up a lot.”
“Oh yeah, I could tell from that profile he wrote about you on Match.com,” she said.
Seth and Roddy were quiet during my back-and-forth with Helen. “That was funny,” I said.
“I didn’t think so.” Helen rolled her eyes and looked away.
“I thought it was funny,” Seth added. “That’s why I contacted her. Sense of humor goes a long way.”
“Well, you guys have fun tonight.” I detected a twinge of jealousy in Helen’s tone. She was probably hurt that I had found a roommate so quickly, never mind that it was my own brother.
Seth pulled me out the door. “Bye,” he called out.
He started heading toward his car, which was on the opposite side of the parking lot from mine. He was holding my hand and leading me along, like it was the most natural thing in the world. “My car is over here, Seth,” I said, gesturing toward my Civic.
“Oh, you don’t want to go back to my place tonight? I can bring you in the morning to get your car.”
“No, thank you. I need to get home tonight. I’m fine to drive.”
He turned and we walked in the other direction. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see his chest heaving. When we got to my car, I unlocked the door and leaned against it to face him. “I’m sorry, Seth.”
“It’s okay, Charlotte.” He sounded annoyed.
“I’m not going to sleep with you after a couple of impromptu dates and ball games where you have to concentrate on playing and I’m sitting there watching you.”
He squinted and I wondered if he was thinking about my one-night stand with Adam. “Do you even want me to call you anymore?” he asked.
My stomach dropped. “Well, yeah, of course I do.”
“I’m not convinced.”
I shook my head. Now I was annoyed. “I’m not sure I’m your type, Seth. I mean, I’m not going to get into wearing Storm garb with my daisy dukes, like Marley.”
“That’s not my type—otherwise I’d be dating her. I just wonder if you’re hung up on that guy.”
I shot him a look. You know I am.
I didn’t say anything in response. Seth was almost a foot taller than me in flats. I had to look up at him and he had to drop his head for us to make eye contact. The parking lot light shone behind him, shadowing his face, making it hard for me to see his expression. I waited for him to say something else.
“I think you’re beautiful. I know you have a sense of humor, yet I haven’t seen much of it in person, and I don’t know why. I can tell you’re smart and savvy and you know a lot of things about the world, but you have such a low opinion of yourself. It baffles me.”
What the hell? “Thanks for those observations, Seth.”
“Wait,” he answered immediately. “I’m just saying I find it odd. You don’t seem to understand how people see you. How men see you. I think that guy might’ve made you feel bad about yourself.”
A lot of guys have made me feel bad about myself.
“I don’t want to make you feel bad about yourself.” He stepped back into the light where I could finally see his face. His smile was tight but sincere, and I realized it was because he could see my face. And he knew I wasn’t having it tonight. “Okay. Drive safe, Charlotte.”
As he turned to walk away, I reached for his hand. I stepped toward him. He was hesitant, waiting for me to make a move. “When will you be back?”
“Thursday,” he said, his tone softening.
“When is your next day off?”
“Thursday.”
“How are you going to school with such a schedule?”
“I do online stuff during the season and then go to classes in the off-season.”
“Where?”
“UC Davis.”
“Really? What are you studying?”
“Veterinary medicine.”
“Huh,” I looked into his gray-green eyes. “That’s sweet.”
He laughed once. “Thanks.”
I leaned up on my toes and touched my lips to his, but he was holding back; I could tell. He was only matching my own motions, too afraid to push for more. We kissed for just a moment and then I pulled away. I could feel him leaning into me as I pulled back. He didn’t want it to end but he was trying to have some self-control.
“How about Thursday then?”
He nodded. “I’d like that.”
“I can meet Obi-Wan.”
“He’d like that.”
“Okay, then it’s a date.”
“Okay, see you Thursday.” He leaned down and kissed my cheek.
“Good luck on the road.”
I opened my door. Seth waited until I got in and started the car. He took a step back and waved as I drove away.
13. Things Change
I didn’t hear from Helen all week. I felt like my heart was breaking, but thankfully Chucky was there for comic relief. We sat on the couch every night and watched TV. He even drank Champagne with me.
“This is actually really fucking delicious. Let’s cook tonight and we’ll drink the rest of this bottle. Want to?”
“Don’t you have a girlfriend, Chucky? Why do you want to sit here and hang out with me?”
“I could say the same to you, Charlotte.” He used my full name and I instantly felt bad for calling him Chucky.