“Kickin’ ass and takin’ names.” I laughed, trying to play the I’m okay game.
Calvin turned to me, his expression serious. “What I’m trying to say is that you are the right man for her. Probably the only one. If… you’d pull your head out of your ass.”
“So, she’s not seeing anyone else?”
His expression was still serious. “No. Not at all. Call her.”
Before I could ask anything else, he slapped me on the back and walked away. I headed to the bathroom to find a private stall and dig the baggy of cocaine from my pant leg. The demon powder that stood between Holly and me.
Back at the hotel, I stripped, showered, and then sat on the small love seat with the baggy of white powder pinched between my finger and thumb, dangling it between my knees. It was all that was left. If I wanted more before getting home, I’d have to venture out into the nightlife of downtown Atlanta.
My mind raced with arguments on why I should and why I shouldn’t get more. It was keeping me alive on the field, but killing me off it. I picked up my phone and moved my thumb to Holly’s number. The small picture of her face beside her number was too small to see her smile. I slid my thumb across it to make it bigger and accidentally called her. Fuck!
I hung up before it rang, I think. Maybe it didn’t go through.
My phone rang, and Holly’s face lit up on my screen. My heart pounded in my chest as I slid my thumb to the answer button. “Hey, beautiful.”
“Hey. I just noticed a missed call from you. Everything okay?”
“Yeah. I hit the call button by mistake. I didn’t mean to disturb you.”
“Oh.” I could hear the disappointment and hurt in her voice. “You okay?”
I stared at the cocaine still in my hand. “Sure, I’m alright,” I lied.
“You guys are doing great. I watched the game tonight. I’m proud of you, Ace.”
I tossed the baggie on the table. “Thanks, beautiful.”
“I won’t keep you. It was really good hearing from you.” She offered me an out, one I knew she hoped I wouldn’t take. I took it.
“Bye, Holly.”
Minutes later, her voice was still echoing in my head, her face reflecting in everything I looked at it. I couldn’t do this. The game was just a game. This was my life, my one and probably only chance at a real one. I picked up my phone and dialed Calvin, asking him to come to my room.
I didn’t bother hiding the coke or the pills. Instead, I left them out for him to see. He walked in, immediately noticed the powder and threw his hands in the air. “What the fuck, Ace?”
“I need help, man. I need your help.”
Calvin’s face softened. He put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a tight squeeze. The equivalent of a real hug for men.
He didn’t speak. He walked over to the table and dumped the coke into a glass of water. I felt sick as he disappeared into the bathroom with it and heard the flush.
“I’m proud of you,” he said sincerely.
I was proud of myself too, for the first time in a long time.
“I’m gonna talk to the coach tomorrow about rehab.” The words felt like fire on my tongue, but I couldn’t take them back.
Calvin nodded.
“It means I’ll miss most of the rest of the season.”
Calvin nodded.
I sat down and picked up a notepad and paper. “Okay, there’s some things I’d like your help with.”
“Whatever you need,” he agreed, sitting next to me.
I gave him my list of what I needed from him. Swore him to secrecy, then thanked him before he left me alone in my room to ponder what I’d just done.
CHAPTER TWENTY ONE
Ace
I was already packed and on my way to the airport when Coach’s face lit up my phone. “Did you see the latest tabloid picture?” he asked. His voice was calmer than usual.
“No, I’m on my way to the airport.”
“Well, just wanted to give you a head’s up that this takes away our ability to hide your rehab stay.”
I had him on speaker and was already scrolling through my browser to find the picture he was referring to. Fuck!
My eyes locked onto the picture of me at that party with Waldo, Farmer Fred, and Butt Head, lines of coke spread out in front of me. “Shit. That picture was taken months ago, right after my dad died.”
“Guess someone decided to make a little profit. Timing sucks, but there’s no good time for skeletons to come crashing out of your closet.”
“I’m sorry, Coach.”
“I know. But I’m proud of you, Ace. Real proud.”
I hung up and leaned back in the seat, fighting back the emotion that wanted to choke me.
It didn’t matter now. I was headed to rehab, so those days were behind me. I just hated that Holly would see it. I knew how hurt she’d be when she realized I’d snuck out to party after our night together.
If she didn’t want me when this was done, I understood that too. I was doing it for myself, but she was the reason I even wanted to try. She made me want to be a better man, a better person. Hopefully, when Calvin gave her my letter, she’d understand just how much I truly did love and appreciate her.
My driver stopped in front of the airport departure gates and opened my door. I only had one bag. The guidelines for what you could bring were strict. I packed a stack of t-shirts, basketball shorts, jogging pants, a couple pairs of jeans, tennis shoes, boxer briefs and socks. My personal hygiene items all had to be new in the package, so what I bought didn’t take up much room. I grabbed the bag, headed inside and started my journey to recovery, and hopefully a better life.
The flight attendant was flirty as she continued to dote on me while everyone boarded and took their seats. Her ass was nice and curvy, and her lips were full and red. There was still a grumbling in my belly that made me hungry for her, even though I refused to act on it. When she leaned over my seat to adjust the belt, her breasts pushed into my chin, and her scent rolled into my nostrils. Fuck, this was gonna be a long trip.
I thought about Holly every time she got close to me during the flight, and what I wanted to accomplish during this month. This hot blonde with the perfect ass and lips had no place in my plans.
“I’m staying in town tonight,” she whispered as the passengers started to unload.
“I’m not able to get out tonight, darlin’.” That was true. I was going on lock down — no women, no drugs.
Her bottom lip pouted out, and she sighed with a high pitched tone that made my balls tighten. “Sorry, darlin’.”
The old Ace would’ve taken her in the plane’s bathroom and bent her over the sink while plowing her from behind. I was proud I controlled my urges.
A man wearing a gray suit that he obviously bought off the rack held a sign with my name on it as I walked through the gates at the Orlando airport. I didn’t need to introduce myself. He walked right up to me and shook my hand. “Dr. Miller. It’s a pleasure to meet you,” he said.