They were sitting below the window off to the left amid a bunch of other trinkets. There were two of them. The same handmade bears like the one I’d found in Lyrik’s apartment. The same kind he’d made for Sebastian and Shea’s son. These two were obviously well used, one plainly made for a boy and the other for a girl.
I could almost picture Lyrik as a wild, spirited boy running through the house with a cape on his back, his little sister toddling behind, trying to keep up, as they both dragged the bears along with them.
Make it if you want it to matter.
Overwhelmed by it all, I whipped around to look at her.
“What’s the song on his arm? The name?” I demanded it before I could stop myself.
Sadly, she shook her head. “Now that’s not my story to tell. But look at you…”
For a second, I recoiled, slammed behind a wall of defensiveness. A flash of Red.
But her expression was the furthest from judgmental. “Sweet girl…I see you…trying to cover up the things you wish you could erase.”
Could she really tell that just from looking at me?
“And my son? He might not completely understand everything, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get it. Just like I know you might not know every single detail of Lyrik’s past, but that doesn’t mean you don’t get him. And it’s like he’s silently begging you to. See him. Get him. Even when I know that terrifies him. He doesn’t want to forget, Tamar, but it’s time he moved beyond it. Maybe you’re the one who can help him do that. He deserves to be loved. Every bit as much as you do.”
Could she be right? That what Lyrik truly wanted was me?
And she looked at me. Looked at me as if she could see through every day and every moment of the last four years. As if she felt every fear. As if she knew every wound.
“You might have given up on yourselves. Just don’t give up on each other.”
“YOU SURE YOU’RE GOIN’ down there?”
Duskiness clung to the enclosed quarters backstage, the hallway narrow and the ceiling low where Lyrik had me pinned against the wall.
People jostled through, moving equipment as the opening band cleared out to make room for Sunder to take the stage. Voices yelled demands and directions, and a frenzied excitement bustled through the atmosphere.
“Do I look like I can’t take care of myself?” I lifted my chin in defiance and let out a little bit of Red. So what if I liked it a little too much that this intimidating boy looked as if he wanted to scoop me up and hide me away.
Protective.
Defensive.
Possessive.
“I just don’t get why you’d want to be down there on the floor when you could be back here with Shea, standing at the side of the stage. Best view in the house, baby.”
I scoffed. “Watching a video on my computer screen is a pretty good view, too, but you and I both know it’s not the same.”
“It’s a madhouse out there tonight,” he warned, as if that bit of information would sway me. “No doubt the pit’s gonna be crazy tonight.”
“Even better.”
He edged in closer. I sucked in a breath, as if I could inhale all the elements of this powerful man. Or maybe as if I could defend myself against them.
Because they were overwhelming.
Consuming.
I pressed back closer to the wall.
His voice was a grumble where he ran his mouth up and down my jaw. “Last thing I need to worry about while I’m on stage is my girl down there, getting trampled underfoot by a bunch of kids who just want to let go.”
My girl. My girl. My girl.
Could it be?
It felt so close.
Attainable.
This untouchable boy right within my reach.
My head rocked back against the wall, granting him better access as he started kissing a path up and down the sensitive flesh of my neck. He dug his fingers into my hips and pressed his already straining cock against my belly.
Well then.
“Are you trying to distract me?” I rasped toward the low ceiling, waffling between caving to whatever he asked of me and begging him to take me back to the dressing room.
“Whatever it takes,” he muttered against my skin. “Terrible, terrible sacrifice I have to make.”
“Right,” I drew out. Laughter that hinted at the giddiness his actions stirred within me tumbled up my throat. Finally, I managed to nudge him back, meeting those charcoal eyes. “I’ll be careful. I promise. I just…”
I chewed at my lower lip, wondering if he got it.
Mouth pressing into a thin line, he seemed to make a decision. With a resigned sigh, he gathered me into a hug. “I hear you, too,” he murmured.
Affection wound in my chest, my emotions all over the place as I looked up into the face of this man. This stunning, foreboding man who’d come to mean everything. Staring up at him was the girl who looked at the world with wide eyes and an anticipating, eager spirit.
One who felt as if she was at the verge of experiencing the good things that world had to give.
The thrill and the excitement and the steady hum.
All the while, those hard, hard lessons learned along the way flickered in the distance. In the recesses of my mind that weren’t all that rusty. They only fueled the rising flames.