A week after I went to Arizona to get Tamar back, I’d gotten a call from Kenzie that Brendon wanted to see me. That she and Brad had explained to him who I was, as well as someone his age could understand.
We’d taken things slow so Brendon could get used to me being a part of his life. All of their lives, really. I didn’t want to go barging in like some kind of selfish bastard, demanding time I didn’t deserve.
Honestly, I had been surprised Kenzie and Brad were willing to give any at all. But Kenzie had always been that way, kind and wanting the best for everyone, and she thought the best for Brendon would be me being a part of his life.
During that first handful of months, we’d established a routine. I’d go over to take him someplace cool a couple times a week when I was in town and have him spend the night at our place at least once on the weekend.
Even after two years, we still didn’t have some court-appointed visitation. I just respected Kenzie and she respected me, and we let things take their course.
No.
Didn’t get to see him nearly as much as I wanted. But I cherished every single second I got.
Blue tickled his sides. “Let me see,” she playfully demanded. She was doing her best not to laugh.
Brendon messed with her for a few seconds, keeping it hidden behind his back, before that same tender expression climbed across his face. Same look he got when you knew he was feeling something deep. He stilled before he pulled the bear out.
A little gasp shot from her. Even though she knew what we were making, considering she’d seen the two my mom still kept in her kitchen a thousand times, and Brendon’s, which he never let out of his sight.
Still, moisture gathered in her eyes, and she accepted it from Brendon’s cupped hands, moving to gently cradle it on her lap.
“I love it,” she whispered.
“Really?” he asked.
“Really.”
Not able to stay away, I climbed down beside them. Brendon sat on his knees where he hovered over Blue, and I lay low on the other. Just taking in the moment.
“Do you know what it means?” he asked, like he was getting ready to tell her the greatest secret.
“Tell me,” she murmured back.
“Grandma says it represents a family being stitched together by a new birth.” He traced his finger over the blocks of pink. “Each piece of fabric represents the people who make up that family, and the ribbon is the love that binds it all together. She says they’re really good luck.”
A wistful smile pulled along her mouth. “It’s beautiful. I bet this is going to be your sister’s favorite bear.”
He touched a bright pink patch. “This is you,” he whispered, and moved onto another. “And this is Dad.”
His grin was wide and excited. “And this is my baby sister.”
She smiled at him. “And where are you?”
“Right here,” he said, touching the small block of fabric.
Making this family whole.
Seemed crazy after how many years I’d lived alone, committing myself to suffering day after day in debt for what I’d done, that all those hollow places would be filled. So full I could scarcely remember what they felt like.
There was a piece of me that hung onto them, though. No. Not because I remained in that tortured hell.
These two?
They’d resurrected me from it.
But I did keep them as daily reminders to be thankful. To never forget family was a blessing. Never to be neglected or disregarded or treated as anything less than the most important thing in life.
Because that’s what they were.
Life.
We all just hung out on the floor for a bit, chatting, the hour growing late. “All right, buddy, it’s time for bed,” I finally said.
“Ah man,” he exaggerated. “Are you sure you’re a rock star? Because you’re not any fun at all.”
Like I said.
A little whip.
Girls were going to be putty in this boy’s hands. Of course, Sebastian didn’t appreciate it all that much when I suggested Brendon and Kallie were the perfect match, the two thick as thieves and kinda perfect every time they were together.
Chuckling, I hopped up onto my feet. “Oh, dude, you’re really gonna pay for that.”
He was on his feet and racing from the room, flying up the curved stairs leading to the second floor. I chased him, reaching out and just missing him every time.
Some games I was just always gonna let the kid win.
Flying into his room, he hopped onto his bed. I wandered in, pulled his covers up to his chest, and brushed a kiss to his forehead.
Clutching the top of his blankets, he lifted his chin and leaned into it, grinning so fucking wide I felt it right in the center of my chest.
Peace.
Happiness.
Calm.
Tamar was leaning against the doorjamb, arms crossed over her chest, watching us with that small, tender smile. She finally fumbled forward, that belly that drove me a little wild setting her a bit off balance. She leaned in and ran her fingers through Brendon’s hair.
This kid who’d become our son.
Affection thick.
Real.
Intense.
“Night, Momma Blue,” he said.
“G’night, sweetheart.” She pressed her lips to his cheek, brushing her hand across my chest as she left the room.
I smiled at my son. “Love you, buddy.”