When I Was Yours

His eyes flicker to mine. “It’s not me yelling that I’m worried about.”


“Me?” I let out a laugh. “Why would I yell? I’ve got nothing to yell about—unless you scratched my car, which I would be kinda pissed about—”

“We’re still married.”

My brain freezes.

“I’m sorry, what?” I let out an awkward-sounding laugh. “For a second there, I thought you said that we’re…still married.”

“I did. And we are.”

“I-I…what?” All I can do is blankly stare at him. “We’re married? I don’t understand.”

“I never filed the annulment papers that you so kindly left for me. So, yeah, that means we’re technically still married. I thought you should know.”

It’s right then when my head explodes.

“You thought I should know? We-we’re married. We’ve been married for the last ten years. Jesus Christ! I can’t…even…” I’m struggling to make sense as well as breathe.

For the last ten years, I’ve believed my marriage never existed in the eyes of the law even though it meant everything to me. And now, I’m hearing that’s not the case at all.

We’re still married.

My body and brain are jumping between confusion to elation to betrayal, which is funny coming from me because I betrayed him in the worst possible way.

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I take some deep breaths.

After a long moment, I look up at him. “You never filed the annulment papers?”

He slowly shakes his head, eyes fixed on me.

“Why would you not do that?” My words come out on a whisper of hope.

Hope for what? That he still loves me?

I almost smack myself in the face for that one.

Adam shrugs.

That sets me off again.

“Jesus, Adam! I’m really confused here! I know I left you, and I did a horrible shitty thing by doing so, but…hell! I’ve—we’ve been married all this time, and I didn’t know. There’s just something fundamentally wrong with that. What if”—I’m mentally searching around for something to throw at him—“I’d gotten married to someone else?” I have to stop myself from laughing at that one. I’ve been on exactly one date in the last ten years, so a second marriage wasn’t exactly on the cards, but that’s beside the point. And for some reason, right now, I want a reason to be mad at him. “You would have made me a freaking bigamist!”

“Look, I’m sorry—”

“You’re sorry? Well, that’s okay then!” I throw my hands up. “How could you have done this?”

I see fire light behind his eyes.

His palms slam down on the counter, and he leans close to me. “Apparently, as easy as you fucking leaving me without a word.”

My eyes widen. “You did this for revenge?” My words come out on a gasp.

I see a muscle pop in his jaw as he works it.

“Nice. Good to know what you think of me, Evie. No, it wasn’t for fucking revenge. I was hurt and in denial that you’d left me. I searched everywhere for you, hoping that you’d come back to me. So, filing those papers was the last thing on my mind. By the time I realized what I’d done, the time had lapsed to allow me to file. I had no fucking clue where you were, so it’s not like I could call you up and let you know, was it?”

He’s got me there. I don’t know what to say to that.

I look at the floor, shifting on my feet, feeling instantly shitty again. I wrap my arms around myself. “I guess…that makes sense.”

He lets out a humorless laugh. Then, I see his hands lift from the counter. By the time I look up, he’s on his way to the door.

“You’re leaving?” I hear the panic in my voice. I really hope he didn’t.

Stopping, he turns back to me. He looks suddenly weary.

My heart aches for him. Well, everything in me aches for him.

He rubs his forehead with his hand. “I came to tell you about the mistake I’d made. I needed to be honest with you.” Those words feel so incredibly pointed, and that’s probably because they are. “I’ve done that. Now, I’m going home.”

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