What I Need (Alabama Summer #4)

My eyes fall on CJ. “Mm?”

“Do you want to finish telling me what was on your mind?”

My mouth pulls down.

Do I want to finish telling him what was on my mind? No. Do I need to? Yes. Just not with an audience.

“Uh,” I look to Jake, then back to CJ, shrugging. “That’s okay. It’s fine. I can wait.”

“You want me to step out?” Jake asks, brows lifting, reading my apprehension and interpreting it wrong.

“No.” I quickly shake my head. “No, please eat.”

“Darlin’, just say it,” CJ returns, eyes serious when he has mine. “You said you were worried about something. And there’s no way I’m going to be able to get that worry out of your head unless you let me in there.”

“It’s fine. It can wait.”

“Babe . . .”

“I don’t think Reed should know about us,” I blurt out.

His brows lift. “Say again?”

I knot my fingers together in front of my stomach. “Uh . . .”

Shit! I don’t want to repeat it. CJ doesn’t look like he’s going to take this news well at all. This could ruin his entire day with Jake.

I pull my lips between my teeth and pretend I’ve gone mute.

CJ cocks his head just as Jake pushes his stool back, dragging the legs against the wood.

“I’m gonna step outside for a smoke. Give you two a minute,” he announces, standing and moving with purpose toward the door, and I know he’s really stepping out because I just made things crazy awkward.

God, I hope I didn’t embarrass CJ. Why didn’t I just get this out while I was half naked, standing in the bedroom with him?

When the door shuts behind Jake, I turn to assess my damage, but CJ doesn’t look embarrassed. He doesn’t look angry either. He looks unsettled. His brows pulling together and his mouth tense while he hunches over the counter, arms outstretched in front of him and hands steepled beside his plate.

My stomach rolls.

What the hell is wrong with me? He deserves an explanation. How could I say something like that and then pretend I've gone mute?

“Reed hired Richard for the job he fired him from,” I begin, stepping up to the sink. “Did I ever tell you that?”

CJ thinks for a beat, then shakes his head.

“He liked him at one point,” I continue. “Richard said they got along, but then we started dating and for some reason, Reed would get on Richard about stuff at work, like single him out about things, and I don’t know if he was doing it because of Richard messing up or because he was dating me. But eventually Reed just started to hate him. And it made things really uncomfortable. He talked bad about Richard in front of me all the time and called him Dick. It put a strain on us. And I know Richard is basically the absolute worst, I know that now, but in the beginning when this all started, he wasn’t. Reed liked him, then we got together and he hated him. And the last thing I want is for Reed to start hating you. I won’t let that happen.”

CJ drags in a heavy breath, then slowly lets it out. “Riley, your brother and I go back a couple of years,” he says, brow no longer furrowed, mouth no longer tight, but relaxed, and his eyes warm and full of understanding. “I get that you don’t want him reacting badly to this and hating me, but that’s something you need to let me worry about, darlin’. If he has a problem, I’ll handle it.”

“You handling it might make it worse and then he could hate you even more,” I argue.

“Babe—”

“Please,” I beg. “Just don’t say anything. Not yet. I can’t have Reed hate you, CJ. I can’t ignore it like I did with Richard and pretend I don't care. Not when I like you this much.”

CJ sits up taller, a look washing over his face like what I just said meant a whole lot to him. “Come here,” he orders, twisting his torso on the stool.

I rush around the counter, step between his legs, and wrap my arms around his neck, getting gathered against his body.

“If he asks me, babe, I’m not lying to the man,” CJ murmurs beside my ear. “That’s fucked up and a guaranteed way for him to hate me.”

I nod, replying, “I know. I’m not asking you to lie. I wouldn’t want you to do that.” I lean back just enough to look into his face, forcing my grip to his neck and his hands to slide to my hips. “I want everyone knowing about us,” I say. “I promise. I love our secrets, CJ, but I don’t want us to be one. I just want to wait a little while before we announce it. And it could be a good thing. Look how well Reed reacted when I left him that message about us living together months after I moved in.”

CJ’s mouth tips up in the corner.

He knows exactly how Reed reacted. I told him. And even though my brother was pissed off at first, he quickly cooled down and accepted it.

Hopefully, this won’t be any different. We just need to wait.

CJ exhales a breath, pulling me firmer against him. “All right,” he says. “I won’t say shit about it tonight.”

“Thank you.” I tip my head up, inviting him in for a kiss he takes without hesitation. When it ends, I snuggle close, allowing CJ to wrap his arms around me once more. “Do you want me to leave you two alone so you can properly catch up?” I ask. “I don't mind.”

“We can properly catch up with you in my arms, babe. That’s where I want you.”

I am so happy he says that.

I smile against his neck. And while I do that, I wonder who holds the record for the time it took to fall in love with somebody, and further wonder if I’m on my way to breaking that record.

It’s got to be close.

Leaning back, I slide my hands to CJ’s face and go in for a deeper, hotter, heavier kiss he reciprocates with passion. Then I pull away, both of us panting, and press my lips lightly against his once more.

“Tell me a secret,” he murmurs.

I smile against his mouth. “I’m falling so fast for you.”



My twelve-hour shift is uneventful, which is a surprise. I’m expecting a few firework mishaps, but the worst I get is this adorable little boy who closed his hand around a sparkler. He was brave about it, big fat tears spilling down his face, but no cries escaping him as he held his mother’s hand while the doctor and nurse I was shadowing did their thing. It’s rare that I get an adult who takes pain like that. But kids? They can be some of the bravest people. It’s inspiring.