“And you can stop taking everything I say the wrong way, too.”
He stood up, forcing her to scramble to her feet as well; otherwise, she would have been left craning her head ridiculously far back. “You know,” said Roland, “you’re the same age as me, so you can stop acting all superior.”
Without realising it, he had handed her a card she could play. “Actually,” she murmured, leaning in towards him, “I used to be about five and a half months older than you. I was gone for eighteen months. I guess that makes me two years older now. I have more life experience. I know more about what’s going on. I’ve had longer to get over my resentment. My resentment is gone! I’m trying to help you, and Mel, and me. So stop … being … so … difficult.”
She poked him in the chest, hard, on all the words after “stop.” Roland was giving her the same look everyone seemed to be giving her lately: the one that said she had sprouted antlers in the middle of the conversation. “Life experience,” said Roland in what he may have meant to be scoffing tones.
“Fifteen wars,” said Freddy. “Six revolutions. I was a midwife twice. I’ve hunted lions. I own a tiny gun that shoots bolts of electricity. If you stop being a dork, I’ll let you use it.”
Roland stared. “A tiny gun…?”
“Ask me tonight,” said Freddy. “Not here. We’ll figure things out together. The sooner you stop thinking of me as the person who insulted you yesterday, the sooner we’ll start making progress.”
“You didn’t change in a day,” Roland told her. She knew he knew what had happened to her, but she remembered having problems with the time travel herself. It just wasn’t easy to wrap your head around.
“You’re right,” said Freddy. “It took longer than a day. You’re going to have to take the short course. Please stop hating me and start cooperating. We’ll save a lot of time.”
The courtyard was beginning to empty out. Freddy wondered which hedge Josiah was hiding behind. A few smokers were watching them, but she doubted they could see much of what was going on. She kept her eyes on Roland.
“I don’t hate you,” he said finally.
“You do a little,” said Freddy, “and okay, I understand that, but you need to get over it. I am sorry for what I said yesterday.”
For the first time in weeks—or, for her, years—Roland smiled. It was a pinched, grudging smile, but it counted.
“You don’t remember what you said yesterday,” said Roland.
“Something something I wish you’d never moved in something something I hope you go blind,” said Freddy.
It took her only about a second to see she had made a mistake. She should have pretended she didn’t remember what she’d said yesterday. It didn’t matter that she was apologising. It mattered that she had said it in the first place. Roland’s expression had been opening out; now she saw him close himself off again. “That’s right,” he said flatly. “You did say that, didn’t you?”
“Roland—” started Freddy, but he was already turning away. “I’ll talk to you tonight,” he said. “But you’re not as superior and all-knowing as you think you are. Stay away from Josiah. You’re going to be the one who screws everything up. You always are.”
She stood there and watched him walk away. There was no use shouting things after a deaf person who wasn’t looking at her. I don’t think I’m superior and all-knowing, thought Freddy, hoping it was true.
21
The rest of the day was agonising. She wanted it to end, and it didn’t. She may have lived through an extra year and a half the day before, but today felt almost as long, and there wasn’t even any ploughing involved.
Math class crawled. Ms. Liu had lost control of the students, and people talked freely over her desperately cheerful explanations of geometry. The only person paying attention was Cathy, who had probably been given a grades ultimatum by her parents again. Freddy noticed that Roland’s interpreter was getting visibly frustrated. Roland was forever turning to stare out the window, not the best move for someone who couldn’t take in the lecture while looking away from it. He also turned occasionally to glare at Freddy, who was sitting next to Josiah.
“He’s going to burn holes straight through my head with his eyes,” said Josiah as Ms. Liu wittered on about pi. “I didn’t quite catch what you were haranguing him about at lunch.”
“He wants a pony,” said Freddy. “He claims he would keep it in our backyard and ride it around the park on weekends. It’s very sad.”
Ms. Liu eventually gave up and just assigned them about twice as much homework as usual, then let them ignore it for the rest of the period. Freddy got through hers quickly. She had a feeling there wouldn’t be much time for homework tonight.
She looked up from the last problem to find Cathy watching her.
“What?” said Freddy.
Cathy gave a nervous little giggle that set Freddy’s teeth on edge. “You do that so fast. I wish I could.”
“It’s just math.”
“Sooooo, like, Rochelle said she barely touched you yesterday, and you fainted. Is that true? You look okay today.”
Freddy kept her face blank. She wondered how long Cathy had been so dim and why she hadn’t noticed before.
“Whatever Rochelle says,” said Freddy, shrugging.
“Only she thinks you’re going to lie to the principal about her. You won’t, right?” Cathy leaned forward. “I mean, there’s no use getting Rochelle in trouble just because she doesn’t want to be friends with you any more. Right?”
Freddy looked at the clock. This period was never, ever going to end.
“Right?” said Cathy.
“I don’t care about Rochelle,” said Freddy, “okay? If she doesn’t bother me, I won’t bother her.”
“That’s perfect,” said Cathy. “Can you help me with the first problem? It doesn’t make sense.”
Between Roland’s deadly glowers, Cathy’s inane questions about easy math problems, and Josiah’s occasional hints that he was on to her, though he clearly wasn’t, Freddy felt she was on the verge of genuine insanity. The bell had never sounded so wonderful.
“I notice you haven’t been able to get into your locker,” said Josiah as they packed up. “Do you even have your flute?”
“I’d taken it home with me. It’s in my bag,” said Freddy. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Roland signing viciously at Josiah. She thought she caught a Stay away from her and perhaps a twist your head off, though the latter was more a spontaneous gesture than it was an actual sign in ASL. A worm of irritation with Roland crept back into her mind. So much had changed for her. Nothing at all had changed for him.
The other flute players watched her warily as she entered the band room. Everyone watched her warily now. The entire school was treating her like a bomb on a timer.