I couldn’t put my finger on it but every brother I knew was genuine. They were who they were and showed it, no bullshit.
I got a weird feeling that what made Crank went deeper, possibly darker. That feeling told me he didn’t share it all. And it was so stark compared to how all the other brothers were it freaked me.
I watched and saw that Crank right then was not paying attention to Chew, Arlo, or Logan, who were also huddled and talking.
He was staring at Tack in a way I found chilling.
I didn’t know what this meant. All I knew was that Brick and Dog were fresh brothers. Hop too.
And they’d all been recruited by Tack.
All the brothers could put forward a man to become a recruit but Tack had been busy the last few years.
I also knew Chew, Arlo, Boz, and Logan had all been recruited by Crank.
So had Black.
But Black was standing with Tack.
There was a split. I felt it. It wasn’t tension, nothing with the brothers was that perceptible.
But there was a vibe.
Things were changing in the Club in a lot of ways. The store and garage were getting busier, the Club pushing for that, which meant Logan was working more. It also meant, since the brothers split any profits equally, he (which translated to we) was making more money.
Like, a lot more money.
Though there was more and that more meant Logan was busy far more than he’d ever been before on Club business that had nothing to do with the store or the garage.
I got the sense he liked it at the same time I got the contradictory sense that it troubled him. I also got a sense that whatever this was was a moneymaking venture that had nothing to do with selling auto supplies and building custom bikes and cars or even growing and selling pot.
Logan didn’t talk about it and I knew he wouldn’t so I didn’t ask so I couldn’t know.
This troubled me.
That concern didn’t run deep. I wasn’t out and out worried. I wasn’t questioning things. I knew these men. I knew this family.
I also knew they were bikers, lived in their own world, had their own rules and did things their own way and those things were whatever the hell they wanted to do.
Last, I knew that if they stayed solid and strong, they could get away with doing whatever the hell they wanted to do. In fact, their bond was so powerful, if they stuck together, they could achieve anything.
This was the part that troubled me.
Because I sensed a split. I sensed that Boz didn’t know which way he was leaning. And I saw that it seemed that Logan had cast his lot with Crank and I didn’t know if that was the right choice.
I sipped my beer, staring at my man, watching him nod at something Arlo was saying, lost in these thoughts until I felt my knee nudged by Boz.
I looked to him and at what I saw in his eyes, I held my breath.
“It’s always gonna be good,” he said quietly.
“Okay,” I replied just as quiet.
“High will make it that way for you, babe. You know it. Yeah?”
Something was wrong in the Club.
But I knew what Boz said was right.
And that was all that I needed.
“Yeah,” I whispered.
He grinned at me and it again didn’t reach his eyes.
Then he kept doing it and finally committing to it when he offered the bottle of tequila to me.
“Time for us to get smashed, gorgeous,” he declared.
I took the bottle from him and replied, “No truer words were spoken.”
Then I threw back a healthy slug.
“That’s my girl,” Boz stated, and when I looked at him, he had humor and approval gleaming in his eyes. His earlier look of uncertainty and disquiet was gone.
I’d done my job.
So I handed him the bottle and slouched deeper into the couch, slouching into Boz as he shifted to curl an arm around me and I shifted to curl my legs on the seat, resting my head on his shoulder.
“Don’t get comfortable,” he warned, giving me a squeeze. “After another coupla shots, I’m kicking your ass at pool.”
“The hell you are,” I returned. “We’re fifteen and twelve with me being the fifteen and about to make it sixteen.”
“Bullshit.”
“You’ll see,” I muttered, sucking back more beer.
When I was done, the tequila was in front of my face and I took the bottle from Boz.
I also threw back another slug.
When I was done with that, my eyes hit on my man.
He was smiling at me, his smile content and not troubled.
I knew it before but I knew it even more then.
Boz was right.
Whatever was happening in the Club would happen.
But Logan would keep it good for me. It’d never touch me.
Not ever.
Not ever.
CHAPTER TEN
Finally
Millie
I SAT IN the back of the taxi, exhausted beyond comprehension, my phone to my ear.
“No, I’m good, Dot,” I told my sister, a complete and total lie since travel and jet lag were kicking my ass. “Is my car at my house?”
“Alan and I took it there yesterday, babe. Also straightened up a bit,” she shared cautiously, giving me the information and doing it not wanting to remind me why my place was left the way it was. “But do you think you should stay there?” she asked, then suggested, “Maybe you should stay over here.”
I wanted to stay with my sister and Alan and the kids for as long as I could stay with my sister and Alan and the kids since I intended to move as soon as I could to Arizona, and I wouldn’t be able to see them whenever I wanted to see them.
But I was wiped and being wiped and needing sleep and clear headspace to get on with doing what I needed to do were not conducive to having two kids under the age of ten in the house.
“I’m gonna crash at my place,” I told her. “And I’ll be fine,” I assured hurriedly, hoping she’d believe me even knowing she wouldn’t. “I just need to get my head together? start getting other things together, and maybe tomorrow night I can come and stay with you?”
“You can stay with us anytime, you know that,” she replied.
I did.
And I would.