June 12, 1885
I would not have gone out today if it weren’t for the letter from Mr Redington that arrived just before noon. He is so composed that at times it makes me smile, for his idea of “inordinate pleasure” is a brief discussion on citrate of soda solution and exposure times. Yet his kind words bolster me more than he can know. Can it be that he really finds some promise in my work so far? I write to him pages and pages of all my anxieties and frustrations, and he sends me concise common sense and encouragement. And a pneumatic bulb!
Charlotte was glad as well, for I’m sure she must tire of being cooped up in the house with small chores and my ill mood. Today was a perfectly fine day to go afield, albeit quite hot. She and I settle into a routine?—?I wear tripod and camera strapped to a knapsack on my back, while she carries the wooden box with glass plates, focusing cloth, etc. (And her sling-shot is always at her side. I must remember to tell Allen when he returns how devoted she was to her promise to protect me.)
In the large meadow on the hill we caught sight of two king birds that behaved like a breeding pair, of which I made notes in my field book, and although we were unable to locate their nest this day, I am hopeful. Then, in a hollow in a dead alder tree, we discovered an occupied sapsucker nest. The darkness of the cavity will not allow for a photograph, I am afraid, but it was a lovely find all the same, and Charlotte was quite taken with the nearly grown chicks.
As we returned to the barracks, we met up with Evelyn, who was strolling with two officers and several young women, and Charlotte and I were obliged to stop and converse with them.
When asked, I explained that we were in search of birds, to which one of the young women said she was fascinated by photography but suggested that it was a rather rough and manly hobby, to traipse about the forest with a camera. The two young men nodded their agreement.
“What a stupid thing to say!” Evelyn replied. “What on earth makes it more suitable for a man than a woman? Do not for a single moment doubt Mrs Forrester. More than anyone I know, she is capable!”
They all seemed taken aback by the passion of Evelyn’s speech, and it occurred to me that they do not know her so well. Nor were they inclined to engage in her debate, but instead began to wander away from us and down the trail toward the barracks, all the while one of the women complaining that they would be late to the band concert at the parade grounds this afternoon.
“Imbeciles!” Evelyn said, once they were out of hearing distance. “But they are the closest I can find to amusement in this place, so I am stuck with them after all.”
She left us then to catch up with her party, but before she had gone far, she did in fact say something that surprised me. “I hope you find your humming bird, Sophie!”
I did not think she was listening that day in Portland when I told her of my impracticable desire. How could anyone hope to photograph the ceaseless motion that is a humming bird?
June 13
At long last, after all these days of searching and waiting, I have a bird! A chickadee on the branch of the alder, with more contrast than I would like and faced the wrong direction, but there it is, all the same!
I was so elated, I ran about the house and shouted for Charlotte to come see the developed plate. She agreed it was wonderfully exciting, but remarked that it was unfortunate that all I had caught was the “tail-end” of the bird. I could not argue her point.
Yet I begin to regain some small optimism. More and more I grasp the way in which shadow, light, and shape transfers to the glass, and how I might manipulate the elements both in the field and in the dark room to achieve more subtlety of detail. And if I can catch the tail-end of a chickadee in a hundred hours, then I must only invest hundreds more.
As for a nest, I fear the season grows late. It may be next spring before I am able to attempt such a photograph. Yet I am pleased to know that while I lack the hand to paint or sketch, it seems I possess some of the necessary traits for this endeavor?—?fortitude and great patience.
June 15
I am grateful that we were not harmed, but now that it is over, I confess I found today’s encounter positively exhilarating! We returned safely to the cabin from the forest hours ago, yet even still I can feel my heart trembling.