June 24
It has become an all too common woe on this journey, but we once again face near starvation. The wild berries on these slopes are hard & green, though we try to eat them. Nat’aaggi snared several chipmunk-like animals. Pruitt says he is unable to stomach the meat. His lack of appetite is concerning.
Nat’aaggi found my tin cup in a mound of dirt & rock that had been recently scraped. She then pointed out the animal tracks in the mud.
?—?Nothchis, she said. Wolverine.
62°56’ N
143°22’ W
Clouds early in the morning.
Does He smile to see His work?
With His shoulder, & His art, He twisted the sinews of my heart.
In this forest, in this night
I am the tyger, burning bright.
Sophie Forrester
Vancouver Barracks
June 23, 1885
I must endeavor to put these dark fears out of my brain. Since developing the plates from the expedition, I find it impossible to eat or sleep. My worry becomes agonizing. I have made myself a pest to the General’s secretary, visiting the department headquarters twice in as many days to ask if there isn’t some word of Allen. Is he safe? Does the General have any word as to whether the men made it through the canyon, and will they be home before winter comes? Are there any reports as to the character of the Wolverine tribes? Is there a plan to send someone up the Yukon River in search of the party if a report does not arrive soon?
Of course, there is no answer, except to say that we must wait.
Charlotte is impatient with being kept indoors, and so I will allow her enthusiasm to propel us. The fresh air and light may do me some good. We have packed a picnic lunch, along with our photography supplies, and I have promised to see if we can find any pied-billed grebes, for Charlotte has never heard their calls.
And I vow that tomorrow, I will attend the women’s tea. Perhaps I will bring cake, or the lemon meringues that Charlotte makes so well, to make amends for my inattention.
It all seems a shallow distraction, yet I do not know how else to continue on.
June 24
Today ended up being a small and unexpected gift. Afternoon tea started out very predictably, but pleasantly enough. I brought Charlotte’s lemon meringues, which everyone enjoyed. Mrs Bailey told us all about the elegant dinner a la Russe she attended in Portland last week, and I asked after Sarah Whithers’ attempt to learn the flute. (She said she enjoys it very much, has learned to play “Greensleeves,” but that her husband finds it vulgar and wishes she would study piano instead. I was sorry Evelyn was not in attendance, for I am sure she would have had something amusing to contribute on the matter.)
Mrs Connor was true to form. She inquired about Charlotte’s work at my house, wondering that the girl has enough to occupy her time since I have no family to tend. I replied that Charlotte is of great assistance to me in my photography, that I have come to think of her more as an assistant than a housemaid.
“Perhaps if the girl isn’t needed for common household chores, she might return to my house. I find I am short staffed.”
I was politely but firmly insisting that the girl remain with me, when I realized a separate conversation was occurring around us.
“We are all interested to know if you have any pictures yet?” Sarah Whithers asked over the din.
“Yes, but they aren’t exactly?.?.?.”
“Oh how we would love see them! Wouldn’t we?”
“Well maybe some time?.?.?.”
The women, however, were already on their feet.
Do you know where I’ve placed my cane? I wish I had more suitable shoes?—?it’s a bit of a stroll down to her house. Will you hand me my coat, Mrs Connor? Should we send for a carriage? No, no you’re right. It would take much longer to wait. Oh this is all rather exciting, like a church outing!
On the walk to our house, I tried to remember if I had put away the ironing, and if there were very many dirty dishes in the kitchen. As we approached the yard, I saw Charlotte peer out a window and then dart away. Please let her be straightening the mess, I thought. I tried to detain the women for a moment by the honeysuckle, to ask them about what other flowering shrubs thrive here, but they were impatient to get indoors.
I was much relieved to see the house was not in too appalling a state, and then Charlotte whispered to me, “I saw you all coming down the lane. Did my best to tidy.” “Bless you,” I whispered in return.