Almost before I knew it, the rhythms of daily life here had become familiar. Jarrod and Rolf were often out overseeing the land or running drills with the guards. Kai spent much of his time in training with a sword, although I wasn’t entirely sure why he put so much time into this. Sebastian spent most of his time playing cards with the guards or talking with me.
He had a close friend among the guards, a young blond-haired, blue-eyed man named Daveed who took an instant dislike to me. He wasn’t openly impolite, but he tensed whenever I drew near. When I asked Sebastian about this, he brushed it off.
I ended up having as little to do with the kitchen staff as possible. Their workload had been doubled—or more—now that they were expected to serve proper meals, and the younger women blamed me.
I began sending for Ester when I wanted to go over menus, and she’d come out to the dining hall to sit with me at the table. One day, I noticed she looked weary.
“Ester, are you receiving enough help from Lavonia and Cora?”
“Yes, my lady.”
I didn’t believe her and knew I should do something about it, but Sebastian had made it clear that if any problems arose, he was to handle them. As I hadn’t encountered any problems myself, I didn’t wish to cause trouble.
And I had other worries.
He continued to sleep in my bed night after night, but he never touched me other than to pull me up against himself or to kiss the top of my head. Did he not find me attractive? Should I do something to instigate? What would that be?
Although I didn’t know everything about the actual mechanics, I did know that unless a man and woman “came together” (as I’d heard it said) in bed, no baby would be created. Soon enough, Jarrod would start to wonder why I wasn’t with child.
I loved Sebastian. No one had ever protected nor treated me with more kindness than him. We had an intimacy I’d never known. We whispered to each other and drank tea or wine in bed. But why didn’t he take action to make us truly husband and wife?
The nights continued to pass.
Then one day, the rhythms of the house were interrupted when Jarrod sought me out to tell me he’d arranged for a formal dinner, the first hosted here in many years.
“Who’s coming?” I asked.
“Lord Allemond Monvílle, his wife, and his brother. Their lands border our southern line, and I’m trying to buy a section of forest covered in oak. The timber alone is worth the purchase.”
“Lord Allemond?”
Jarrod’s eyes sharpened. “You know him?”
“Yes.”
“Good. I expect your best efforts here. He’s only coming to look down his nose at me. I want him off guard by what he finds.”
That night as I readied myself for bed, Sebastian came to the room in a state of excitement.
“Father actually asked me to help make this evening impressive. He’s ordered me before, but he’s never asked. I want everything to go well.”
“We’ll make it perfect,” I assured.
Miriam began working on a new gown for me. With Betty’s help, I started sewing clothes for the men. Matilda began cleaning madly. Sebastian and I planned the menu with meticulous attention to detail. He wanted to start the dinner with baked salmon in a simple white sauce.
Two days before the dinner, I couldn’t find him and I wanted to ask him about centerpieces. I thought he might be in the barracks playing cards.
As I stepped out into the courtyard, I nearly ran into Rolf, who was on his way in. Normally, he wasn’t home at this time of day, and the near collision unnerved me. My head barely reached his chest.
He looked down with his usual angry glower, but to my surprise, he spoke.
“And how are you enjoying life with your new husband?” he asked. “I assume by now you’ve realized you made the wrong choice.”
He sounded so sure of himself. Did he know there was something not quite right with the marriage?
But I understood Rolf better than he might think. Rolf respected only strength, and showing him any sort of weakness was a mistake. Drawing myself up, I channeled my mother’s voice.
“If my other two options were you or Kai, I’d say I made the only choice.”
With that, I swept past him, feeling better than I had since my arrival. It felt good to stand up to Rolf and not find myself in need of Sebastian’s protection.
Mid-morning, the day of the dinner party, I was in the great hall experimenting with centerpieces. The Volodanes grew no flowers, and Sebastian had asked me to see what I could do with wild flowers. He badly wanted to impress his father, to show that he too could contribute skills that would help raise the status of the family, and I was determined to do everything possible to help him.
I had a bouquet of wild roses in my hand when Jarrod and Sebastian walked in.
“Is everything ready?” Jarrod asked.
I turned to face him. “Yes, I think so.”
“It better be,” he warned. “I want Allemond impressed by what he finds here.”
I wasn’t sure anything would impress Lord Allemond, but I could at least make sure nothing went wrong. The salmon had just been delivered and were now in cold storage in the cellars.
My mind was so busy running details through my head that I was caught unawares when Jarrod said, “And you know I’ll expect your help with this land deal. I want your best efforts.”
For an instant, I couldn’t draw breath. My father had told him. Of course Father told him. I had so much hoped to leave that part of my life behind me.
Feeling defeated, I asked, “Who do you most wish me to focus upon? Allemond himself or his brother? I hope Father told you I can read only one person in a day.”
Jarrod stared at me. “What do you mean by ‘read’?” he asked slowly.
Then I realized my mistake. He didn’t know anything. His mention of my help must have referred to me using my manners and family influence to throw Allemond off guard.
“Nothing,” I answered. “I thought you wished me to gauge his reactions and offer counsel later.”
In a flash, his right hand snaked out and grabbed my wrist. I gasped as he jerked me up against his chest. The pain in my arm was startling, but it only lasted a few seconds.
Before I knew what was happening, Sebastian snarled and bolted forward and shoved his father away from me.
“Don’t touch her!”
I stumbled forward as I was released, and both men faced each other. Jarrod appeared more stunned than anything else, but his fist was drawn back ready to strike. He hesitated. Sebastian wasn’t as tall as his father, but he was younger and his tightly muscled body looked like a coiled spring.
The tension was thick until Sebastian took a step back. “The dinner will be perfect if you give me a free hand,” he said, “and Megan will provide all the help you need with the guests. Just don’t touch her. She’s mine. You do as you like with the rest of us, but not her.”
Jarrod was so thrown by Sebastian’s behavior that he seemed to have forgotten all about me. Sebastian motioned toward the archway with his head.