Today was no exception. Koa and Mack were halfway down the street as I followed behind them, walking toward Canal. We’d passed two tap dancers both with upturned ball caps at their feet, dancing on sneakers with bent spoons tied to the soles and a small Jazz trio of horns blasting “When the Saints Go Marching In” for the curious tourists.
My attention was divided between my alternatively bickering and laughing siblings and my phone, waiting on Aly’s return text asking if she wanted dinner. She’d told me last night, as I tried convincing her not to go back to her condo, that she’d have to miss my little shopping spree with Koa and Mack so she could work on competition choreography that got delayed with my parents’ drama. I’d hated her leaving. I’d hated her missing the day with us too. With my injury, the rehab that followed and my final decision to change that IR status to retired, I’d forgotten Koa’s birthday. I’d be officially retired at the end of the season and Mom and I had plans to scout new artists. I was looking forward to that. Since I couldn’t indulge my kid brother without also spoiling Mack, she’d come along too. They both deserved it. Our parents had started their anniversary celebration early this year spending the next week holed up in a cabin atop the highest mountains Tennessee offered. They’d left before the sun came up, opting to tackle the ten-hour drive in Dad’s new Hybrid Denali. Better them than me.
As Koa jabbed Mack in the side, and she retaliated with the heel of her tween-appropriate boot heel on top of his foot, I suddenly realized just how long this week would be. Very damn long.
“Makana,” I started, using my “angry brah” voice when she made for another jab against Koa’s foot. She wasn’t threatened, it seemed, hurrying up the sidewalk, stopping only when we’d cleared the main intersection at Canal and were well down Camp. I’d parked hoping to get a yes from Aly on dinner and a hell yes that she’d agree to a sleep over since Mark and Johnny would be in this afternoon to spend a few days with us before they left for Nepal on another Doctors Without Borders mission.
“Look, brah,” Koa said, nodding toward the studio building. “There’s Aly and…oh…”
It was that “oh” and the quick stop my brother made that had my grip loosening so that my phone slipped out of my hand and onto the pavement at my feet.
“I thought you fixed this,” Koa said, grabbing my phone off the ground before he plopped it into my jacket pocket.
The street was crowded with fall shoppers and tourists hurrying around the city grabbing everything pumpkin spiced in the shops and delis around us. Across the street Aly stood leaning against the building, her face down, bag slung over her shoulder with Ethan in front of her, holding her hand, caging her with his arm as he rested a palm against the building's facade.
“Kunāne. It’s Aly,” Mack said, seeming to not notice how close Ethan stood to Aly, how her face was flushed, cheeks pink as though she was winded maybe from the exertion of her dance, maybe from…other things that made me want to gouge my eyes out.
“Makana, you and Koa go grab a hot chocolate.” I nodded toward the coffee shop at my right, pulling out a twenty to hand it over to my little sister. Mack didn’t argue and I felt her staring at me, saw in my peripheral the shift of her head as she watched me, then turned toward Aly.
“Do you want any…” But Mack didn’t need an answer. My head shake was good enough.
“Stay there until I come get you,” I told them, looking away from the cozy scene across the street to see my siblings safely inside the coffee shop.
They hadn’t seen me, Ethan and Aly. They hadn’t seen anything but each other, it seemed, faces close together, expressions unmarked by any emotion I could make out. Ethan stood too close to Aly, and she let him. As I approached, my heart sped up, the awareness of the world moving on around me and that big, big question of "why?" moving over and over in my head, shouting in my ears the closer I came to them, screaming in my head when Ethan took Aly’s face between his hands and kissed her. Passionately. Deeply.
Right in front of me.
She didn’t immediately stop him, only pushing him away after seven of the longest seconds of my life. They broke apart and Ethan, taking her by the hand, escorted Aly into the building. They still hadn’t seen me.