Since then, there’d been radio silence. The fact that he’d stopped reaching out made her sad, but relieved. She couldn’t blame him. After all, she hadn’t been responding to him. Who’d want to have a one-sided conversation? Gabby stared at his name on her phone and wondered if he was over her yet. He’d fallen in love with her so quickly; maybe he’d already met a new girl to dance with in the kitchen . . . in the bedroom . . . in the living room. The thought made it hard for her to breathe.
Just as she was debating erasing his contact information, the prison doors creaked open, and for the first time in four years, her mom stepped out into the world. Elaine had cut her hair since the last time Gabby saw her, and her normally dark locks were streaked with gray. Instead of the orange jumpsuit, she wore a purple cotton blouse and high-waisted faded blue jeans. Gabby used to make fun of her for wearing them, but they were now actually back in style.
Her mom stood at the top of the steps, taking a deep breath of fresh air, clearly savoring her freedom. Her head tilted back, her eyes closed, and she smiled. Gabby, through her heartache, found herself smiling, too.
“Mama!” Gabby called out. Elaine’s eyes fluttered open and she looked around, finally spotting Gabby at the bottom of the steps. The two women squealed as Elaine ran down and into her daughter’s arms.
Gabby hugged her mom as tight as she could. “Dang, Mama,” she said, eventually stepping back from the hug and taking a look at the woman before her. “Freedom looks good on you.”
Elaine did a little shimmy of excitement. The two grasped hands and didn’t let go until they got to the car.
? ? ?
“YOUR PLACE LOOKS great,” Elaine said as they walked into Gabby’s apartment. “You’re cleaner than I am!”
“Well, I knew the queen of clean was gonna be stayin’ with me, so naturally I tidied up.” Gabby walked over to the air conditioner and turned it on. It was only early May, but it was muggy already. “Sorry I couldn’t keep our old place. It was just too expensive.”
“It’s lovely,” Elaine said, looking around the room. “What’s this?” she asked, walking over to a small pink and white Easter basket from Gabby’s childhood that sat on the futon. Gabby had filled it with her mom’s standard toiletries, like Rembrandt toothpaste and Pantene Pro-V shampoo and conditioner.
“I just picked up some of your favorite things.” Gabby pulled her hair into a ponytail and sat on the couch. “I figured you’d probably wanna pamper yourself, now that you’re out.”
“Look at you taking care of your mama,” Elaine said with a proud smile. “I should be the one taking care of you.” She put her hands on Gabby’s cheeks, and the two of them awkwardly stood there in the middle of the room for a moment. Gabby had made space for Elaine in her home, but she still wasn’t sure how to make space for her in her life.
“I’m gonna order some pizza for us,” Gabby said, breaking up the silence. “Pepperoni from Giovanni’s?”
Her mom nodded enthusiastically. “Sounds delicious.”
Later, as they indulged in the pizza, they caught up on the past month.
“So, are you ready to talk about why you broke off your wedding with Tony?” Elaine asked as she blotted the grease off of the pizza with a paper towel. Gabby had mentioned the breakup during their visitation in April but hadn’t gone into detail. She didn’t want her mom to know the truth about why she was being released early—she knew Elaine would feel guilty, and this was supposed to be a fresh start for them. Plus, if Gabby was being honest, it was easier for her not to talk about it.
“Um, it just didn’t work out. We were two different people.” She took a big bite of pizza, trying to stave off any further conversation.
“I’m so sorry to hear that.” Her mom put her hand on her shoulder. “It’s better that you found out before you actually got married though. Saves both of you a lot of pain.” She shook her head. “You will find somebody great one day. . . .”
“I sure hope so,” Gabby said, attempting to figure out a way to steer the conversation elsewhere. “So, what’s your plan now that you’re out? What’s on your agenda?”
“Well, for starters, I’m gonna make up for lost time with you,” Elaine said, her eyes shining. She put her pizza crust on the paper plate and wiped her hands with a napkin. “I’m gonna make things right, okay? I’m gonna get a job and help you pay for college. I owe you that.”
Gabby put her plate down and frowned. “Mom, I’m almost twenty-two. I’ve made it okay on my own and you don’t owe me anything. Besides, looking out for me is what got you in trouble in the first place. . . .”
Her mom sighed and then hung her head.
“Sorry, that came out wrong.” Gabby bit her lip. “Listen, today marks a clean slate for both of us, okay? No more lies . . . no more guilt. Let’s just put everything in the past and start over—what do you say?”
Elaine took a deep breath. “I’d like that.”
“Okay, great!” Gabby grabbed her half-eaten pizza crust and held it up. “To new beginnings,” she said, tapping her mom’s crust with hers.
“To new beginnings!” Elaine smiled. “Hey, you know what I’m craving? Ice cream! Want to go to Dairy Queen for dessert?”
Gabby’s eyes lit up. They used to go through the drive-thru all the time. A cookie dough Blizzard was her mom’s reward for good grades and a pick-me-up when either of them had a bad day. One time they both got the giggles so hard as the car pulled up to the speaker that Elaine couldn’t even get the order out. When she finally did and they pulled up to the takeout window, tears of laughter were streaming down both their faces. The employee’s confused look only made them laugh harder.
“I’m in!” Gabby said.
As Gabby drove them toward the outskirts of town, she scanned through the radio stations until she found her mom’s favorite—the classic country music station. But instead of it making Elaine happy, her mom started to cry.
“Oh my gosh, what’s wrong, Mama?” She kept her eyes on the road but reached her arm out to comfort Elaine.
“I’m sorry,” she said, drying her tears. “It’s just—being out. It’s incredible! I’m so thankful. And being back . . . with you.” She put her hand on Gabby’s leg. “I know you said I don’t owe you anything, but I’m gonna be a better mom. I promise, Gabs.” Elaine looked out the window as a semi-trailer truck passed them on the interstate. “Prison changed me. It made me realize what life was really about.”
“And what’s that?” Gabby asked, slowing the car down as she took the exit for Dairy Queen.
“Family—you.” She leaned her head back on the headrest. “You’re my world, Gabs. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.” Her voice grew angry. “And I was so stupid and so focused on giving you material things that I ended up missing out on years of your life.”
Gabby turned the car into the parking lot and shut the engine off. “Listen, Mama. I know you were just trying to help me. You were in a tough situation, and I get that you were putting my happiness first.” She flashed back to her deal with Mr. Ford; she understood the feeling of putting someone else first all too well. “I want you to know that I forgive you,” she said, realizing that she meant it.
“You do?” Her mom smiled through the tears.