Fuck, this was why I didn’t date in town. I liked to be able to control when I was able to tell someone about my son. Then when I found out she didn’t know, I thought I’d finally have that opportunity to make it right, and Vanessa had fucked it all up.
“Well, you blew it. Vanessa is here. She’s in Lubbock. She found me and cornered me and tried to make me feel worthless. And you know what? She didn’t succeed. She said some horrible things, but I knew where you and I were, and I was giving us a chance. But then I found out…nope, you weren’t giving us a chance.”
The limo pulled up in front of the stand at that time. The driver jumped out and opened the door for Emery.
She shook her head. “You take it.”
“Please,” I begged. “Please just let me explain. I gave you the opportunity to explain. Give me that same chance. We said we’d try this together. I want to do this together. After we talk, if you think I’ve relinquished our second chance, then I’ll just…drop you off at home. But I won’t let you go. I’ll keep fighting for us because you are the only woman I have ever met who has made me feel like this.”
She swallowed and looked away from me. Tears glistened in her eyes, but she wouldn’t meet mine. She was torn. I could see it. She was willing to hear me out, but she didn’t think I deserved another chance. I would have to prove her wrong. Because this was all a mistake. A misunderstanding. We could get through this. I would make sure of it.
Without another word, she sank into the limo. That was her answer. Yes. Yes, she would try.
I deflated in relief. I knew that this needed to happen. I’d just thought I’d have more time. I also…hadn’t anticipated her being on the defensive when I finally told her.
It felt like control was slipping out of my fingertips, and I wanted to be able to hold on tight. It just seemed, with Emery, I was never in control. A feeling I was unaccustomed to. But I was beginning to realize, this wasn’t a power struggle; it was just two people in love. And I needed to stop trying to hold on to my past and move forward with my future.
I took the seat next to her in the limo.
She scooted over so that she could face me. “Why didn’t you tell me that you had a son?”
“We’ve only been dating a couple weeks, and I’m a very private person. I wanted to make sure that this was the real deal. I don’t introduce people to my son who are going to leave his life. I don’t think it’s fair to him. Since he lives in New York with Vanessa, that’s where his life is. I fly to New York all the time actually. Nearly every single holiday and at least once a month so I don’t have to uproot his life. I’m fortunate enough to be able to do that.”
“So…you thought that I would leave your life?” she asked.
“Honestly, until this week, I didn’t know.” I ran a hand back through my hair and tried to ignore the death glare she was sending me. “But I changed my mind this week and wanted to make it right. Colton was supposed to fly in tomorrow with the nanny so that you could meet him. I had no clue that Vanessa was going to show up unannounced or why she decided to come a day early.”
“I think she made it perfectly clear to me,” she grumbled.
“I promise there is nothing going on with me and Vanessa. Our relationship centers entirely around our son.”
“I just hate that I found out from someone else.”
“I was planning on telling you tomorrow,” I repeated with a sigh.
“Too little, too late,” she whispered.
“Honestly, Emery, I was going to tell you tomorrow. I wanted to get through our date and have an amazing time with you. I even gave you my mother’s necklace.”
Her hand dashed to the diamond hanging around her throat, and her eyes shot to mine. “You gave me your mother’s necklace?”
“Yes. Morgan and Sutton have most of her pieces, but she left me a few. She wanted them to go to the woman I loved, and I gave one to you. I’m sure that’s why Vanessa freaked the fuck out. She’s seen it before.”
Emery retracted her hand from the necklace at the mention of Vanessa. “And you really didn’t know that she would be here?”
“No. Fuck, no. I don’t want her here. She obviously just wanted to fuck with me.” I cleared my throat. “You told me that you wanted to do these things together. I was going to give you that opportunity.”
“I think it’s sweet that you wanted me to meet him,” she said softly, “but I don’t know why you wouldn’t tell me before I met him, like…I don’t know…the day you said you saw Vanessa in New York. You were clearly there to see Colton, not her, right?”
I nodded. “I was.”
“Yet you didn’t tell me. You told me the whole story about Vanessa cheating on you with Marc, how your ex-wife and Cheaterpants horribly ruined your life, but you left out the part where you had a son in the mix of it all. It’s like I know only half of your story. I got the abridged version of the book. You could have told me at anytime, and you didn’t. Did you think that I wouldn’t be understanding?”
“No,” I said immediately. “Emery, that’s not it.”
She wrapped her arms around herself and shook her head. “I think I just need to cope tonight, Jensen. I don’t fault you for having a son. I love Lilyanne, and now, I understand why you’re so good with her. But I just fear that you’ll never really trust me. Maybe you’ll never trust anyone again.”
Her words lingered between us.
Half an accusation, half a prayer.
I didn’t know what to say to that. Had I not trusted her? Had I really been trying to push her away? I’d been planning to tell her, yet that hadn’t been enough. Landon had known that when he had confronted me two weeks ago. Even if I had told her tomorrow, she would have been upset. I could see that now. Falling in love with someone and leaving out the most important thing in your life was showing no trust at all.
I could see the hurt and despair in her eyes. That I had claimed to love her, yet I had fed her lies about my life.