I shook my head. He definitely didn’t.
“Who could pass up a big bowl of ice cream and Disney movies?” he asked.
“I’m certain, no one.”
“Found it!” Lilyanne cried.
“Let me guess,” I said.
“No! It’s a surprise.”
“Okay. I won’t look,” I told her. I took the Blu-ray from her and popped it into the player.
Lilyanne took the spot next to Jensen and instructed me that I had to sit on the other side of her. With Lily in the middle, Jensen draped his arm across the back of the couch and kept his hand on my shoulder. I smiled at him as the opening credits to Frozen began. It was only a matter of minutes before the entire thing became a sing-along. By the time “Let It Go” came on, Jensen and I were swinging Lily between us as we all led into the chorus.
We finished Frozen, and we were halfway through Tangled when Lily began to crash. To my amazement, it was already well past her bedtime. She lay stretched out between us with her head on a pillow in my lap. Her eyes kept fluttering closed as her sugar high dissipated. I waited until she was sound asleep before moving out from under her.
I reached for my phone and saw that I had a text from Kimber.
Everything is all right here. It was Braxton Hicks contractions, but they last a long time, so the doctor just wanted to check me out. I’ve been told I need to rest, but I might die since I haven’t even finished Christmas shopping! Be home soon!
As long as you and the baby are okay, that’s all that matters. We can shop on Amazon and have all the presents delivered!
“All right. Everything is okay with Kimber. They’re leaving the hospital soon.”
“Good. I’m glad that the baby didn’t come early,” Jensen said. “Want me to take this one up to her room?”
“You don’t mind?”
Jensen didn’t even reply. He just lifted Lilyanne into his arms like a baby doll and effortlessly carried her up the stairs. I followed, directing him along the way. He gently placed her on her bed and tucked the covers all around her. She let out a satisfied sigh, and Jensen just smiled at her.
Jensen eased the door closed behind us. He took my hand, and we walked back downstairs. I curled into his side on the couch as Tangled continued to play in the background.
“You’re really great with her,” I told him.
“I like kids.”
“I like kids who are raised right. Lilyanne is an angel compared to some other kids her age.”
“That is true,” he agreed. His eyes slid down to me, and he smiled. “She’s full of possibilities. I love that about her. She has so much joy and is full of life. I think she reminds us all that we need to live a little more. Be a bit more carefree.”
I nodded. “That’s definitely Lily.” I sighed and thought about all the things in my life that hadn’t been full of joy. All of those things that had led me to this moment. “It’s part of the reason I left my PhD program.”
“What do you mean? You didn’t feel carefree anymore?”
“I didn’t have any joy. I just wish I’d figured it out sooner. I wish I hadn’t needed to be hit over the head to know the program wasn’t right. I mean…I’d already completed my comprehensive exams. All I had to do was finish my dissertation and defend it to my committee to pass.”
“How could you quit if you were so close?” he asked curiously.
I bit my lip and looked away from him. “I really didn’t love it. I think I was doing it because one thread kept pulling me back to it. The stress got out of control. I couldn’t handle it, and I had to get on anxiety medication. Plus, well, I found out my advisor was sleeping with an undergrad.”
“Jesus,” he said. “What a prick! Did he get fired?”
“I didn’t turn him in. I just broke up with him and quit the department.”
I wasn’t sure I could have shocked him more. Jensen’s mouth was actually hanging open.
“You were dating your professor?” he asked.
“Yeah, for almost three years. Welcome to my life,” I said with a stiff laugh.
“How long ago did you find out about him cheating on you?” he asked.
His knuckles were white where he had bunched them into fists, and I noticed he looked pissed. No, livid. Like, if he could, he would murder Mitch right then and there for hurting me. Sometimes, I wanted to murder Mitch for what he had done to me. And, other times, I thought that the whole thing was a big joke. An easy, convenient joke. But I didn’t think it was love or even lust anymore.
“I don’t know. Two weeks?” I shrugged nonchalantly.
“Fuck. I’m sorry about that. And only two weeks ago? No wonder you didn’t want to go on a date.” He had released his fists, and his gaze returned to mine. “Is all of this too soon?”
“No,” I said immediately. I reached out and ran my hand down his shirt. I didn’t want him to think that I was still in love with Mitch or pining over him. “It had been over with Mitch long before I ended it. I just hadn’t had the nerve to realize what I really wanted.”
“And what do you really want?” he asked, sliding his hand across my back and pulling me toward him.
“Something I’m really passionate about.”
“And what is that?”
“I’m really not sure. I think I’d just like time to decide.”
“You have all the time in the world.”
He brushed his lips against mine. I leaned into him with a sigh. I liked the idea that I had time to figure out what I really wanted in life. Because, besides Jensen kissing me right now, I really didn’t know.
“What are you doing next week?” he asked against my mouth.
“Seeing you, I hope.”
“I have to be in Austin for a few days to sign some paperwork. How would you like to show me around?”
I tilted my head to the side and looked at him in surprise. “Really? But it’s only a few days before Christmas.”