“She really misses you.”
“And I miss her. She’s a sweet girl. She tries so hard, but sometimes her nerves just run away with her.”
“Oh, I know. I think she’s the one person who taking a little drink once in a while might help.”
As predicted, Tot Whooten arrived at Still Meadows not too long after Ruby. As soon as she had been greeted by Miss Beemer, a voice said, “Hello, Tot. It’s Mother.”
Tot was stunned to hear her mother’s voice sounding so young and vital. “Mother? Is that you?”
“Yes, honey, it’s me.”
“Do you know who I am?”
“Of course I do.”
“You don’t have Alzheimer’s anymore?”
“No…my mind came to me the minute I passed away. It’s going to be like old times having my little girl back with me.”
Tot never dreamed that she would ever be able to talk to her mother again, much less have her back in her right mind. Her mother had not recognized Tot for the last sixteen years of her life.
Later, she spoke with her grandparents, her old neighbors, and many of her old clients from the beauty shop. Verbena called out, “I’ll bet you won’t miss having to go to work every day, will you, Tot?”
“You got that right, honey,” Tot said, and turned to Elner. “The thought that I will never have to tease another head of hair makes me want to jump for joy.”
Ruby said, “You’re just gonna love it here, Tot. Just think, all your troubles are over…no more cares or woes. Nothing but smooth sailing from now on.”
“Well, hooray. I wouldn’t go back and do that life I had over again if they paid me. What about you, Elner? Weren’t you glad when it was over?”
“Oh, I don’t know, Tot. Even with all the little worriments of life, I enjoyed it.”
“Easy for you to say, Elner,” said Tot. “You weren’t married to a fool.”
A male voice interrupted. “Hello, Tot.”
Tot was taken by surprise. “Is that you, James? Where are you?”
“Six rows back.”
“Oh, that’s right. We put you in the old Whooten plot.”
“How are you, dear?” asked James timidly.
“Well, other than being dead and buried, I’m just fine.” Tot turned to Elner. “Good Lord, I forgot he was out here. I’m just glad he’s way back there and not next to me. I don’t need to have that new wife of his stepping over me every time she comes to visit, thank you very much.”
James heard what she said. “She doesn’t come out here much, Tot.”
“Ah, well…I could have told you that.”
“Yeah, she ran out on me.”
“So I heard.” After a moment, she said, “You broke my heart, James.”
“I’m sorry. Do you still hate me?”
“I never hated you, James. I was just frustrated. If you had just stopped drinking sooner, we could have made it. I needed you, and your kids needed a father. And God knows I certainly didn’t turn out to be much of a mother, working at the beauty shop all day, but what could I do? Somebody had to make a living. Anyhow, both the kids are a mess. I don’t know how many generations it’s going to take to undo the damage we caused them. Dwayne Jr. keeps marrying all these idiot women who think they can save him; Darlene has had three no-account husbands and is working on her fourth. You’ve got one granddaughter who’s hooked on crack cocaine and been arrested twice, and another who’s a pole dancer up in Kansas City, full of tattoos and nose rings. And the worst part of it is, she thinks she looks good.” She sighed. “I don’t know, James, I tried, but I failed. I was just telling Elner I’m glad I’m dead.”
“Oh, honey, now don’t say that….”
“It’s true. I was awfully tired. I just couldn’t do it anymore. You have no idea what a relief it is going to be not to have to jump every time the phone rings, wondering which grandchild has been arrested now and for what.”
“I’m sorry, Tot. I always loved you. I just didn’t know it.”
“I’m sorry, too, James. I guess I didn’t make it any easier on you. I shouldn’t have thrown that cement gnome at you.”
“That’s all right, honey.”
“But in your defense, I don’t think you were ever the same after you got that piece of rice stuck in your ear at the wedding.”
“Maybe,” said James. “But still, it was no excuse for me to act the way I did.”
There was another long silence, then Tot said, “James, we can’t go back and undo all the hurts, but I would like to be friends. Can we do that?”
“Tot, you don’t know how long I’ve prayed about that.”
“Good. Now that we are friends, could you please tell me what in the hell you ever saw in Jackie Sue Potts?”
“God only knows. I was a fool, that’s all I can say. A damn fool.”
“And the worst part, she was one of my customers!”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“Well, you’re a man, so I guess some of it is not your fault. You just couldn’t control yourself when it came to women, and you’re certainly not alone in that department.”
“Amen, sister!” thought six other women who were listening in.
“Maybe,” said James. “But you think I didn’t feel guilty? You don’t know how many times I wanted to come home, but I was too ashamed to face you.”
Tot heard what he said. But still, she wished he had come back home to her. He didn’t know it, of course, but she would have taken him back in a second.
Elner noted that it was always interesting to find out things you didn’t know. Although they really liked her, most people thought Tot was tough and bitter. And she could say some pretty cruel things. But bless her heart, the truth was that all along, she had been hopelessly in love with a man who wasn’t there. Unrequited love will turn even the sweetest people bitter.
—
THE NEXT DAY, ELNER and Verbena were talking about how wonderful it was that Tot and James were speaking again. “And he’s sober!” said Verbena. “I never thought I’d live to see the day.”
While the two old neighbors chatted, a huge flock of crows suddenly landed in the oak tree. Then a few seconds later, the whole flock picked up and took off again. Elner laughed. “Aren’t crows funny? I know a lot of people don’t like crows, but I always got a big kick out of them. Sonny hated them and tried his best to catch one, but he never did. Poor old Sonny.” Then Elner suddenly sang out, “Oh, Sonny boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling, from dust to dawn. Oh, I’ll be there in sadness and in sorrow. I love you so, oh Sonny boyyyeee….”
Verbena interrupted her. “You’re singing the wrong tune, Elner. That’s ‘Danny Boy.’?”
“Oh, that’s right.” Then she sang out, “Oh, climb up on my knee, Sonny Boy, though you’re only three, Sonny Boyyyeee….”
Will Shimfissle giggled and said to a friend, “Don’t her singing sound like twenty bobcats with a bellyache?”