‘He gets used to it, being out there in the dark, curling his toes to keep them from freezing. Watching the light in her windows. Imagining himself turning the key in the door and stepping into that warmth, and her coming to kiss him. Imagining the two of them cooking dinner together in that bright kitchen. He finds a routine, a kind of equilibrium; a kind of contentment. He could live like that indefinitely.’
Rory has changed. No more timid little gerbil. He’s sitting forward, hands moving in fast, clean, confident gestures; that charge under his voice has built till every corner of the room hums with it. For the first time I can see why Aislinn went for him. This shite is the last thing I’d want in a guy, but it’s got power. Rory has risen up out of his beige huddle and become someone who would make you turn to look when he came through a door, and keep looking.
‘And then,’ he says. ‘Saturday night. This man went to watch Aislinn, as usual, but what he saw was different. He saw her all dressed up and made up, glowing like a treasure chest. He saw her making dinner, not just for herself, but for two people; taking two wineglasses out of the cupboard and bringing them into the sitting room. He saw her singing into her corkscrew, dancing, shaking her hair around and laughing at herself. He saw how happy she was. How she couldn’t wait.’
Getting ready singing into corkscrew like teenager w hairbrush. That smell of blood soaks the air again, butcher’s-shop thick. Rory’s imagination is good, but he’s not clairvoyant. He was watching Aislinn on Saturday night.
‘It would have knocked him breathless. He must have felt like the world was tilting, he must have thought he had believed in that daydream so hard that it had burst its way into reality . . . He wouldn’t have known that that’s not the way life works.’ A bitter wrench to one side of Rory’s mouth. ‘He would have been sure that, somehow, Aislinn was wearing that dress and cooking that meal for him. And when he could breathe again, he would have stepped out of the dark and wiped the worst of the rain off his coat, and he would have knocked on her door.’
Nice ending. Rory folds his hands, takes a long breath and looks at me expectantly. He wants to leave it there.
I’m loving this interview. Not just because it’s going well; I’m loving this interview because it’s clean. No ifs and maybes twitching in the corners, gumming up the air, itching inside my clothes. No layers on layers of outside chances and hypotheticals to take into account every time I open my mouth or listen to an answer. Just me and the guy across from me, and what we both know he did. It lies on the table between us, a solid thing with the taut dark shine of a meteorite, for the winner to claim.
I say, ‘And then?’
Rory’s neck twists. When I keep watching him, eyebrows up and inquiring, he says, ‘Well. And obviously Aislinn wasn’t getting ready for him; she was getting ready for me. She hadn’t so much as thought about him in months. So she would have been astonished to see him. Presumably she told him to leave. And that’s when he snapped.’
I keep up the inquiring look. ‘And . . . ?’
Lower, to the table: ‘And hurt her.’ That charge is ebbing out of the room, out of Rory’s voice and his face, leaving him wispy and beige again. His lovely story has burst, just like he described, against the gravel-sharp reality of dead Aislinn. When the silence keeps going, even lower: ‘Killed her.’
‘How would he do it?’
Rory shakes his head.
‘Rory. Help me out here.’
‘Don’t you already know?’
‘I’m asking you a favour,’ I say gently, leaning in to catch his eye. ‘Pretend it’s just a made-up story, OK? Like the ones you told Aislinn? Just finish it for me. Please.’
‘I don’t . . . All I know is he wouldn’t have had a weapon with him. A knife or anything. He would never have been planning to . . . Maybe a, a, a lamp or something, something that was already there . . .’ He runs a trembling hand across his face. ‘I can’t—’
He’s not going to let slip that he knows how she died. No big deal; it was a long shot. ‘Wow,’ I say. I lean back in my chair, blow out a long sigh and run my hands through my hair. ‘Man. That’s some powerful stuff.’
‘Is it . . .’ Rory catches a deep breath. He pushes his glasses back on and blinks at me, trying to refocus. ‘Could it be useful? Do you think?’
‘It could,’ I say. ‘It could well be. I’m obviously not going to go into the details of what I’m thinking, but there’s a chance you could actually have given us something really valuable there. Thanks for doing that, man. Thanks a lot.’
‘No problem. Do you think—’
‘Hello-ello-ello,’ Breslin booms cheerfully, bursting the door open with his backside and swinging in with his hands full of mugs. ‘Sorry I took so long; that shower of uncivilised gits can never be arsed bringing their mugs back to the canteen, never mind washing them out. I had to chase these down. On the plus side—’ He hands out the mugs and sweeps a packet of biscuits out of his jacket pocket with a flourish. ‘O’Gorman’s stash didn’t let me down. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you chocolate-covered Oreos. Who’s your daddy?’
‘Ah, you star,’ I say. ‘I’m only starving.’
‘At your service.’ Breslin tosses an Oreo to me and one to Rory, who of course fumbles it, drops it on the carpet and has to go after it. He stares at it like he’s not sure what it’s for. ‘Get that into you,’ Breslin tells him. ‘Before O’Gorman comes looking.’
‘Come here,’ I say, dipping my Oreo in my coffee. ‘Rory’s got a theory.’
‘Thank Jesus,’ Breslin says. ‘At least someone has. Any good?’
‘Could be,’ I say, through most of my biscuit. ‘Long story short, he figures Aislinn was the type who could get a guy fantasising about happy-ever-afters a lot faster than normal. So there was some guy who Aislinn was seeing, so briefly that he hasn’t made it onto our radar; and once she dumped him, this guy got in over his head thinking about her. Started watching her. When he saw her getting ready for her dinner with Rory, he convinced himself she was waiting for him. Knocked on her door, got a nasty shock when she wasn’t happy to see him, and snapped.’
‘Interesting,’ Breslin says. He throws his biscuit into his mouth and chews meditatively, considering. ‘I like it. It could work with a lot of what we know.’
Rory doesn’t look encouraged. He’s huddled in his chair, picking carpet fluff off his Oreo. The second Breslin walked in, he faded and shrank and twisted like a boil-washed jumper.
‘Exactly,’ I say. ‘It’s got that feel, you know? In this job, you learn to recognise when something feels right. Practically and psychologically.’
‘We love that feel,’ Breslin tells Rory. ‘We’ve been hunting it all week. I’ve got to admit, my son, your theory is the nearest we’ve got to that feel. We’ll get people digging deeper into Aislinn’s incidental contacts – nightclubs, work connections. If this guy turns up, Rory, we owe you that ticket to Barbados after all.’