“Uh, no. That’s disgusting,” I tell him.
“Good. No milk in your beer, no penis in my daughter’s eggnog!” he shouts at me before resuming his panicky yell as his snow boots stomp across the kitchen floor.
“I SAID CODE RED! WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING SITTING AROUND ON YOUR ASSES?!”
“What the fuck is happening right now?” I ask Nicholas.
“I think my dad wants you to keep your dick out of my sister,” he replies.
“No shit, I already got that memo,” I tell him with a roll of my eyes. “The code red stuff, what’s the deal?”
Nicholas sighs and gets up out of his chair. “That my friend, means if you don’t want to be dragged out into the snow for the next hour helping my dad fix whatever catastrophe is happening out in Winter Wonderland, you better run now. Run and save yourself.”
Oh, hell no! I have plans with a naked women tonight. I will never be able to get a boner again if I have to spend the next hour out in the freezing cold listening to Reggie yell at me about milk.
A few seconds later, Noel comes running into the room, grabbing an extra coat off of the hook by the back door and slipping her feet into a big, clunky pair of her father’s boots.
“WHERE THE HELL ARE ALL THE EXTENSION CORDS? WHO HID MY EXTRA FUSES? BEV, CALL THE COPS, WE’VE BEEN ROBBED!”
Reggie’s muffled voice echoes from the basement below us, followed by the crash of something falling down there with him.
“NEVER MIND! FOUND THE FUSES! NICHOLAS, GO TO HOME DEPOT AND GET ME FIFTEEN CHRISTMAS TREES, STAT! JOHN BARKER THREE HOUSES DOWN HAS TEN MORE THAN ME. I WILL NOT LET THAT BASTARD BEAT ME THIS YEAR!”
“Jesus God,” Nicholas mutters. “He’s lost his fucking mind.”
Noel finishes buttoning up the coat and yanks a scarf off of the coat stand, wrapping it around her neck. “Be nice. This lighting contest is the only thing he has to live for.”
“What about mom?” Nicholas asks.
“FOR CHEDDAR’S SAKE, REGGIE, YOU ARE NOT BUYING FIFTEEN CHRISTMAS TREES, YOU STUPID OLD FART!” their mother shouts down to their father from the living room.
“You were saying?” Noel asks her brother, turning her big green eyes toward me.
I watch quietly as they widen pleadingly like a little puppy dog.
“Will you please come out and help?” she asks me, her lips turning down in a cute little pouty frown.
Fucking hell. So much for my naked woman plans.
With a sigh of defeat, I get up from my chair as Noel claps her hands together with glee, quickly grabbing another coat from the hook next to her and tossing it in my direction.
Yep, it’s official. When I’d rather do anything to see that look on Noel’s face instead of having her naked and on top of me, I think it’s time to admit defeat and throw in the towel.
“DON’T YOU TELL ME WHAT TO DO, DEVIL WOMAN!” Reggie hollers from the basement. “NICHOLAS! I DON’T HEAR YOU GETTING IN THE CAR AND GETTING ME MY DAMN TREES! NOEL, START CHECKING THE BULBS ON SANTA’S WORKSHOP AND SPRAY SOME AIR FRESHENER IN THERE. SAM, YOU BETTER RUN BECAUSE THAT PLACE SMELLS LIKE YOU’VE BEEN DRINKING MILK IN IT!”
I quickly throw on the coat Noel tossed to me and let her grab my hand and pull me outside into the snow before Reggie comes up here and shoves that entire box of fuses up my ass.
Defeat isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I have fallen for this woman and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it. Aside from run away from her Christmas-light-crazy father.
Chapter 11
Noel
“This is dumb. I feel dumb,” I complain as paper rustles when I put my hands on my hips.
“Humor me. Turn around, slowly.” Sam’s lips curl up in a devilish smile as he lounges back on my bed with his hands under his head.
I’m standing in my childhood bedroom, with hundreds of strangers traipsing through my parent’s yard outside, wearing nothing but a scrap of white wrapping paper with blue sparkly snowflakes on it. I feel like an idiot, but the dreamy, lustful look on Sam’s face as he watches me slowly turn around makes it a little better.
We spent exactly thirty minutes outside in the snow earlier checking bulbs and making sure the display looked okay before sneaking back inside the empty house. After my mother made us pose for a family photo in front of the house, of course. Yet another family tradition, but this time, I had to practically drag Sam into the picture. He didn’t feel right being in the photo, but I insisted. I couldn’t imagine looking at that photo years from now and not having that memory of him standing beside me, with his arm flung over my shoulder, smiling happily into the camera.
Years from now when I’m still alone, not settled down, and miserable without him.
Nope, I will not think about that now or this little Christmas paper fashion show will be ruined with snot and tears and me looking pathetic.