Man, my heart was racing.
It thumped in my chest sporadically, pounding hard against my rib cage and nearly making me shake. I sat in the back seat of the black car with Crewe beside me, my large dress taking up the chair and the floor. When I arrived, I didn’t know what to expect. Joseph would be waiting to make his move, and the monster that haunted my dreams would be there as well.
I didn’t know what to do.
I couldn’t be alone, even for a minute. If Crewe excused himself to use the restroom or to speak to someone important in private, I would have to cling to his side anyway. If I had to pee, I would be forced to hold it. If Joseph got me alone, I would be powerless to stop him.
So I had to make sure Crewe never left my side.
This night was gonna be long.
Crewe held my hand on his thigh, his piercing gaze examining my face. “You’re flushed.”
“Just nervous.”
“You’ve done this once before.”
“Doesn’t make it any easier. You never get nervous to entertain a room full of the most important people in the world?”
He shrugged. “I’m used to it. I’ve been doing this sort of thing for over thirty years.”
“Well, I haven’t. How am I supposed to introduce myself?”
He smiled. “You remember your name, don’t you?”
“I mean, what am I to you?”
“No one will ask.”
“Uh…I think they might. I can’t say I’m your girlfriend.”
“Why not?” he asked with furrowed eyebrows.
“I didn’t think dukes had girlfriends. Don’t they just choose someone to marry, and that’s it?”
His expression didn’t change. “We live in modern times now. If it comes up, you’re my girlfriend.”
I was? “Okay.”
The travel to Edinburgh was painfully quick. We got there in no time at all. My heart was still pounding in my chest, and I wanted a time machine just to get through the night as quickly as possible. I wanted to avoid Bones and my brother without getting stuck with some duke from Iceland in the corner, talking about politics I didn’t understand. I was glad Crewe took me as his date because I obviously meant something to him, but I’d much rather be at the castle waiting for him to come home. “Ariel didn’t have a problem with you taking me?” It was the one time I relied on her to help me. I knew she hated me and would have done anything possible to prevent this from happening. But she dropped the ball on that.
“I don’t care if she had a problem.” He kept his eyes out the window. “She’s just my business partner. Her opinion about my personal life is irrelevant.”
Damn.
We arrived at the distillery minutes later. We were an hour early before the party actually began, probably because it was customary for the host to greet the guests as they arrived.
Crewe helped me out of the car and circled his arm around my waist as he guided me inside. The place was constructed of stone-white and brown bricks, and the trees outside were covered in white lights. In my mind, I was picturing a warehouse of some kind. But this place was beautiful.
We walked inside to see a beautifully decorated hall. It could easily fit a hundred people, and I wondered what was usually stored inside. I imagined there were barrels of scotch everywhere, ready to be shipped to large businesses or wealthy clients. Waiters and workers were still preparing everything, and Crewe dropped his hand from my waist to give further instruction.
It was starting.
I immediately moved to his side and stuck to him like glue, taking a step every time he did. There was no way I was going to be left alone, even for a second. Joseph could be watching me at that very moment.
Waiting for the perfect opportunity.
12
Crewe
The party was in full swing, and everyone seemed to be having a good time. I greeted the Queen at the entrance, and she remembered London from the first time they met. Despite her old age, she was as sharp as a tack and refined as ever.
I introduced London to other members of the nobility, and she smiled and remained polite. She hardly said anything other than pleasantries, probably because she was so nervous. I’d rarely seen London show her unease when she was out of her comfort zone, but she was definitely showing her vulnerability tonight.
When I had a moment to breathe, I guided London to the side and waited for a waiter to appear with a tray of wine. “You’re doing great, Lovely.”
“I am?” she whispered. “Because I feel utterly terrified right now.”
“What’s there to be scared of?” My hand was glued to her waist because I wanted everyone in the room to know she was mine. She wasn’t just my friend or an employee. She was the woman sleeping in my bed every night.
“Uh, are you kidding?” she asked. “I just met the Queen—again. How many people can say that?”
“A lot of Brits, actually. She makes a lot of public appearances.”
“That’s like me meeting the President of the United States. It’s unbelievable.”
Her reverence was cute, and I couldn’t help but smile. “If it makes you feel better, I can barely tell you’re nervous. You’re doing great.”
“It’s because I downed a whole glass of scotch when we walked inside.”
“Well, there’s always more if you need it.” I’d been good at cutting back every day. I managed to get by with three glasses of scotch instead of nine. It was hard in the beginning, but it got easier as time went on. I actually felt better because of the change.
“I may take you up on that offer.”
I glanced at the door and saw Josephine walk inside with Sir Andrew. He wore a deep navy blue suit and stood a foot taller than her. With features typical of the Irish nobility, he had bright blond hair and searing blue eyes. He was ten years older than her and not really as good-looking as me.
But she made her choice.
Josephine’s eyes landed on me, and she stared at me without blinking.
After that night when she called me, I didn’t think about her again. My thoughts had been filled with London exclusively.
But my duty required me to greet both of them. The best way to kill scandal was to absorb it. By inviting them to my gatherings and being civil to them, it made the fiasco look less dramatic. But it was all an act.
I hated both of them.
I guided London with me as I approached the happy couple. Andrew’s arm was around Josephine’s waist, and she wore a cream-colored dress with a red shawl. She looked like typical royalty. I could spot her in a crowd instantly. “Good evening. Thank you for coming.” As customary, I kissed Josephine on the hand even though I’d rather throw up on it.
Josephine watched my movements, the sadness in her eyes.
I shook Andrew’s hand next, pretending this interaction was perfectly normal. “Great to see you.”
“The pleasure is ours,” Andrew said with his Irish accent. “I can already tell it’s going to be a night to remember. Congratulations on your success, Crewe.”