This is it. You always wanted to be a rock star.
“I think so,” I said. “You see, I’m a man without conviction.” My voice was calm, unemotional, on the verge of monotone. “I’m a man who doesn’t know how to sell a contradiction.”
They blinked, looking at one another in confusion. Probably wondering if I’d lost my sanity, Corina said, “I’m not sure I understand.”
“I’ll explain,” I said as my mind’s eye began to visualize my escape path. I wasn’t sure how much time I would have.
“There’s a song,” I continued, my voice calm as my brain raced. “It’s an old song. Some people may call it an ‘oldie but a moldy,’ but it’s not. It’s legit.”
First thing’s first. Jump on the table. It’s got the clearest path to the door. Jump up, pivot left, jump down to the right of Taraval.
“The song is about the fear of being alienated, of standing up for your essence.”
Tell David to open the door. Can apps control their rooms when they’re disabled? Did Pema think of that?
“Basically, if you aren’t true to yourself, if you don’t act like you feel, then nature will get back at you. Karmic justice.”
Once you’re in the hallway, walk briskly, but don’t run. Don’t make a scene if you don’t have to.
Taraval smiled, but not in a nice way, looking at Shafer’s holographic presence. “It’s a no. I told you as much.”
Pema leaned forward, concerned. “Are you saying no, Joel?”
Look for the green door. Run up, not down. Get to Floor Thirteen.
“I’m saying that this was Culture Club’s seminal song. Definitive of young optimistic angst in the 1980s. A battle cry to break from the shackles of an oppressive society.” My voice was involuntarily rising in volume.
I started humming the intro, the song still fresh in my mind. Taraval looked at Pema like I was nuts. Corina Shafer lowered her head.
“Just listen to these lyrics, guys,” I said, and then started to croon: “I’m a man without conviction. I’m a man who doesn’t know…”
I had the world’s worst sense of direction, but this wasn’t a fucking pirate treasure map. I kept coaching myself. Just go left out the door, four doorways on the right, look for the green door. I made it my mantra: Up/Left/Down/Elbow like a boss/Left/Right/Up/Up/Up/Up.
Thirteenth floor. Lucky number thirteen. Great. I don’t even know who’s going to be saving my ass when I get there.
“Joel, I think that we—” Corina began, but I cut her off with song:
“You come and go, you come and go… oh, oh, OH!”
No turning back now. Sing it like you’re in the shower.
I closed my eyes, belting it out: “Karma, karma, karma, karma, karma chameleon!”
Silence.
There was no indication that anything had happened.
It didn’t work.
“Okay,” said Corina. “I think we should call—”
Her hologram paused. Taraval and Pema froze.
It did work! Go, go, go.
I un-pretend-handcuffed myself, and jumped onto the table.
Unfortunately, that was the extent of my grace. As I went to pivot left, I became disoriented going through Corina’s hologram, slipped, and inadvertently head-butted Taraval with the full weight of my body as I dropped to the floor.
He didn’t move from his position. He couldn’t even open his mouth, but he moaned in pain.
Fuck! That hurt.
I didn’t have time to worry about whether I’d just concussed myself. I can only thank the adrenaline pumping through my veins for surviving what should have been a first-round knockout. As I painfully lifted myself off the floor, I said, “David, please open the door.”
“With pleasure, sir,” said the room.
I stepped into the empty hallway. Literally, it was devoid of any semblance of life. They didn’t want witnesses, I thought darkly. The emptiness was a perfect mirror for how I felt in the world at that point. Alone. Hollow. Joel Byram cannot come to the comms right now.
I decided to wallow later. I turned left and speed-walked down the hall, counting off the doors on my right. Beige, beige, beige, green!
There it was before me. The familiar, emergency-exit green.15 I only had to open the door, go up four floors, and throw myself on the mercy of whomever I found there. Pema had promised they would help. I certainly needed some.
I put my hand on the doorknob and pulled, but there was a problem.
It was locked.
12 Quantum microscopy is the science of using a scanning tunneling microscope to look at and determine the future state and location of atoms. This is key in human teleportation because it addresses the “fidget problem,” that living things have a tendency to move. Quantum microscopy enables the atoms within an object to be analyzed without damaging its exterior structure, or shell. It’s what makes scanning and sending incredibly complex things like the human body possible. The scanning tunneling microscope operates by taking advantage of the relationship between quantum tunneling and distance by using femto nanos called “piezoelectric sensors” that change in size when voltage is applied to them.