“But Piers, you told me if I required relief I had to come to you.”
And at the time, she’d told him to piss off. What had changed? Why couldn’t he leave it alone, just take what she was offering? Instead, he put his hands to her hips and lifted her off him, placing her gently on the sofa before passing her the towel, which had completely fallen off.
She clutched it in her lap, not bothering to try and cover herself. Her eyes were almost black, and she glared up at him. “So you don’t want me?”
“No.” God, that was about the biggest lie he’d ever told, but he realized while he desired her, he wanted to know what was going on more than he wanted a quick shag…Which was a first.
“Really? I somehow find that hard to believe, considering the bulge I can see in your pants.”
“Maybe I do want you. But I also want to understand why you’re coming on so strong.”
“Does it somehow injure your male pride for me to take the lead?” Her lip curled up in a sneer of scorn. “You know, you’re not still living in the Dark Ages. Things have moved on. Women are allowed to make the first move these days.”
He knew that, and he had no objection. Usually.
“Or maybe you’re scared you’ll be a huge disappointment after all the big talk.”
She nearly had him with that one. But he held his ground. She needed to talk to him. Tell him what she was feeling.
That brought him up short.
Since when had he been concerned about “feelings”? Obviously, this whole Andarta thing was getting to him. Andarta had been the only woman he had ever loved. But what did love have to do with anything?
He glanced at Roz and realized he wanted more than this from her. He didn’t know what, but definitely more.
When he didn’t answer, mainly because he was speechless, shut down by his own wayward thoughts, she rose jerkily to her feet. The towel fell to the floor, and she stalked completely naked to the front door.
Yanking it open, she stood to the side and gestured to the hallway beyond. She was gorgeous. For a moment, he admired her. Maybe she wasn’t today’s idea of what was beautiful, but to him she was perfection. He was insane. Totally fucking insane.
“Out,” she snapped.
He crossed the room but paused at the door. “Will you be all right?”
She stared at him as though the question made no sense. Then her expression cleared, and she smiled sweetly. “Yes, I’ll be all right. Because guess what? Thanks to you, I’ve got my vibrator, so I don’t need some dick who can’t make up his mind whether he wants me or not. Maybe the hot-cold thing works with some women but not with me.”
There wasn’t a lot he could say to that—at least not that would make sense. So he walked out the door.
It slammed behind him, and he heard something smash against the wood. He was betting it wasn’t the scotch.
He ran a hand through his hair. What was the matter with him? He could be in there now, lodged deep inside her, drinking her down, feeling her come apart beneath him. Or on top of him or…Whatever she believed, he liked women who knew what they wanted and weren’t shy about asking for it.
No, it wasn’t the fact that she was pursuing him that bothered him. It was why she was doing it. There was an edge of desperation to her actions, and he wanted to understand her.
He was still hard, and his balls ached for some sort of relief. But it was late. Dawn came early at this time of year, and when he made love with Roz, he wanted the time to enjoy it. Tomorrow night would be soon enough. Maybe if she had the day to think about why he’d acted this way, she would come up with the right answer. And maybe she might even share it with him.
On the other hand, if she didn’t, he reckoned it was only fair to let her seduce him. Otherwise, she might get a complex. Start thinking she was undesirable. No, tomorrow night, he would give in.
…
Roz stared at the closed door.
Well, that hadn’t gone as planned.
She glanced down at herself. She was naked and hadn’t even noticed. Where the hell was that stupid towel?
It wasn’t that he hadn’t desired her. She had felt him, full and hard, beneath her. Tasted the need in his kiss.
She realized how much she had relied on this to keep her from thinking. To blank her mind of the future, or rather the lack of a future. She’d decided what she was going to do. And she wouldn’t back down.
But she was afraid. In truth, she didn’t wish to die now any more than she had five hundred years ago.
It was just that now she had learned there was a price to pay to hold on to that life. And this time the price was too high.
But she’d needed someone to hold her. More than that, she’d wanted Piers to hold her, to make love to her, to make her feel she was not alone through the last hours of this last night.
But the truth was, she was alone. As she had always been alone.
She went to the bedroom and crawled into bed, dragged the pillow into her arms, and hugged it tight. For the first time since her mother had died, she curled up in a ball and cried.