More than satisfactory. Grace ran through the arithmetic in her head. At that rate, if she stayed at Nethercross for ten years, she should be able to put away a modest little nest egg for her later years. Everything she’d managed to save until now had gone to keep her during those uneasy times after she’d bolted from one position until she found another.
“I did not hesitate in order to drive up the salary, sir.” Much as part of her longed to accept this generous offer, another part resisted. It was all very well to daydream about staying in his lordship’s employ for years and putting money away. But how could she be certain her past troubles would not repeat themselves? Could she maintain her disguise for that long with Lord Steadwell never suspecting her secret?
“Then why do you hesitate, Miss Ellerby?” Lord Steadwell’s words interrupted the struggle within her. “You seemed eager to secure the position until I offered it to you. Is there some difficulty of which I am unaware?”
The fear that he might withdraw his offer tipped the balance. “Only that this all seems too good to be true, sir. I did not expect to be offered the position with so little effort and on such generous terms. I have been much more accustomed to ill fortune than good in my life. I mistrust the latter because it is unfamiliar to me. If you had questioned me for hours on end then made me wait several days to learn your decision, I might have been quicker to accept.”
How perverse her feelings sounded when she tried to put them into words.
Yet Lord Steadwell listened with an air of sympathy. “Would it help if I assure you this situation will hardly be a dream come true? Though I love my daughters, I am not entirely blind to their imperfections. You will have your hands full with all three to teach. Charlotte thinks herself quite grown up with nothing more to learn. Sophie’s head is so full of imagination she scarcely has room for any knowledge of the real world. And Phoebe... heaven help you keep her still long enough to learn anything.”
It did sound like a challenge, but one Grace was eager to undertake.
“And with my wife... gone,” Lord Steadwell continued, though it sounded as if the words came hard to him, “my girls will need more from a governess than book learning alone. For a while at least, they may look to you for the guidance and affection of a mother.”
That possibility did not discourage Grace either. She had long yearned for a closer bond with her young pupils. But the women she’d worked for previously had often seemed jealous of any attachment she tried to cultivate with her charges. They sought to secure their children’s affection by indulging their every whim, leaving it up to her to exert discipline. If her pupils misbehaved, their mothers took her to task for failing in her duties. Yet if she tried to exercise control over them, the children knew they had only to complain to their mothers to escape punishment. Such a system had made her pupils resent her and she them.
Despite the hazards of teaching in a motherless household, Grace recognized there might also be some advantages.
“Besides those difficulties,” his lordship concluded, “Nethercross is rather isolated and I am not in the habit of taking my family to town for the Season. We are near enough to London that I can go there through the week when my attendance is required in the House of Lords. I fear you may find little to amuse you on your half-days.”
So his lordship would be away from home for a great part of the time through the spring and fall? Perhaps there was less to fear from this situation than she’d supposed. “That is no hardship for me, sir. My chief amusements are reading, writing letters and going for solitary walks in fine weather.”
Lord Steadwell heaved an exaggerated sigh. “In that case, I fear Nethercross will seem like a paradise. I hope it will not discourage you further from joining my household.”
His wry levity was difficult to resist. “No sir, it will not. Nor will any of your other dire warnings. If you are still prepared to hire me, I would be pleased to accept.”
Had she made the right decision? The moment the words were out of Grace’s mouth, doubts returned to assail her.
The position in Lord Steadwell’s household promised greater security than she had known in many years—but not without a subtle threat of danger.
Chapter Two
THERE WAS SOMETHING distinctly odd about the new governess he’d hired. As they drove back to Nethercross that afternoon, Rupert stared at the woman sitting across from him, her head lolled to one side in sleep.
Somehow she looked younger and more appealing than when she was awake. Her dreadful little spectacles had slipped down her nose and her features relaxed into a less forbidding expression. Her pale complexion benefited from the faint flush of sleep. Innocent as she looked, he could not escape the feeling that Miss Ellerby was hiding something. But that was ridiculous surely. What could a woman like her have to hide?
Her air of vulnerability made his chivalrous nature want to protect her... even from his own doubts.
But he had his daughters to consider. Their well-being mattered far more to him than that of a woman he’d just met. Miss Ellerby had never explained why she’d moved so often from one post to another, allowing him to draw his own conclusions, which might not be correct. There was also her curious hesitation about whether she wanted to work for him. At first she’d seemed so eager, almost desperate to secure the position. But when he offered it to her, she’d been suddenly reluctant. Was it truly because she could not believe her good fortune?
Their situations were quite opposite in that respect. For most of his life, he had known nothing but good fortune until Annabelle had been taken from him with such cruel suddenness. Miss Ellerby’s past experiences made her reluctant to trust any boon that came too easily. Had his loss made him cling too tightly to the things and people he treasured, for fear they would be stolen away too?
He chided himself for offering Miss Ellerby the position so quickly then insisting she accept when she’d hesitated. Rupert blamed it on his stubborn streak. He had come to Reading with the intention of hiring the least attractive applicant and he could not bring himself to deviate from that plan, even when questions arose regarding her suitability.
Rupert was so absorbed in his contemplation of the lady that he had no idea how long they’d been driving until his carriage turned off Bath Road and headed north, skirting Ashley Hill. This road was rougher than the main one, making the carriage bump and sway. Its jolting soon woke Grace Ellerby.
Her eyes flew open and her gaze immediately collided with his. Shame slithered through him, as if he’d been caught doing something improper. She gasped and her hand jerked up to push her spectacles back in place.
“Do not be alarmed, Miss Ellerby.” He shifted in his seat, drawing back his outstretched legs. “You fell asleep for a while, which is just as well. The longest part of our journey is behind us now. A few more miles will bring us to Nethercross.”