Fantastic. I’m being tested by something this deranged wench is hallucinating in her mirror. “Show me.”
The mirror’s surface swirled, a writhing puke of blood and shite and vomit. Shapes took form, at first vague and liquid, but coalescing as he watched. He saw broken limbs, twisted to impossible angles, jutting from churned mud. Eyes, bright and blue, watched him. Morgen. I know this scene. The fat Slaver tortured the boy, trying to break the godling’s will.
“This is the past,” said Bedeckt.
“No, she only sees the future.”
“I’ve seen this before.”
Zukunft shook her head and turned the mirror back to herself. She stared into it. “There’s a family. A band of Geisteskranken—they’re led by a Mirrorist who thinks he speaks to the One True God in his mirror—will catch them. The Geisteskranken make the father watch as they rape and murder his wife and son.”
“One True God?” He remembered hearing about something like that long ago in Geldangelegenheiten.
“They’re T?uschung,” she said as if that explained everything.
Bedeckt recognized the name. “That’s ridiculous. The T?uschung are one of those timid religions preaching an Afterdeath of peace and tranquillity. They claim that once everyone believes as they do we’ll all Ascend to become gods or some such horseshite.”
“She says that’s the lie they tell to hide the evil madness at the heart of the religion.”
She again.
“She says they believe this responsive reality is a prison and that suffering will free us. They’ve hallucinated their own hell, some kind of mass delusion. It’s called Swarm. Torturing people is part of making sure their souls end up in the T?uschung hell.”
That made as much sense as any religion. Maybe Morgen and his Geborene weren’t so bad. At least the boy wanted things to make sense. Bedeckt could appreciate that, even if he didn’t like the lad’s methods.
“And this One True God?” he asked.
“He enforces the rules of our reality. He’s supposed to be our jailer, even though they believe he never interferes.” She shrugged. “Doesn’t make much sense to me.” She laughed, a soft sound, and rested her hand atop his right hand, massaging the ridges of scar with her thumb. “But then it is a religion.”
Even drunk Stehlen would never interfere with that hand. The right being his whole hand, it was always left free and clear, ready to reach for a weapon should the need arise. What kind of life had Zukunft led that she could be so blissfully unthinking?
Not everyone expects to have to kill someone every moment of every day.
Bedeckt pulled his hand free and Zukunft gave him a pouty moue of pretend sadness.
“Some deranged arseholes are going to torture some folks who are stupid enough to get caught,” said Bedeckt. “Why show me?”
“Your list.”
Why the hells had he told her? It was stupid. “It’s a list of things I won’t do. There’s nothing on there saying I have to race off and save every damned idiot out there. It’s a shite world. Shite things happen.” Again he saw Morgen, shattered limbs sticking from the mud. He remembered his rage at the thought someone did this to such a pure soul. And how did that turn out? Yet that rage bubbled once again. Bedeckt ground his teeth and Zukunft shifted her chair a little farther away.
“You said you don’t hurt children.”
“I’m not hurting that boy.”
“You’re allowing him to be hurt. Your inaction will doom his soul to the T?uschung hell.”
“I can’t save everyone.” Down that path lay madness and failure.
“You don’t know about everyone. You don’t have a chance to save everyone.” Zukunft’s green eyes never left his.
Let them die. Not my problem. “This,” Bedeckt nodded at the mirror, “this is definitely going to happen?”
“There are too many people with too many choices for anything to be fixed.”
“So it might not happen?”
Zukunft stared at him.
To hells with that family. “We have to go to Gottlos,” Bedeckt said.
“It’s almost on the way,” said Zukunft.
Almost. Bedeckt remembered Morgen, mind broken from pain, begging him to end his life. No one would be there for this boy. He’d never understand why these men did such horrible things to his family. Bedeckt’s knuckles cracked as his half hand formed a meaty fist.
Hadn’t Zukunft said something about this being a test? Shite. He understood immediately. If I don’t do this she’s not going to help me.
“If we leave now we can stop this?” he asked.
“Maybe.”
She wanted him to endanger an already tenuous plan for a gods-damned maybe? On the other hand, without Zukunft and her Reflection there was no plan. She’d promised to show Bedeckt how to stop Morgen, but beyond that he knew nothing. It was entirely possible this whole side trip was part of whatever the Reflection saw. Maybe he had to do it. “Why does she,” he nodded again at the mirror, “want to test me?”