“Isn’t that a shame?” I sighed. “Hey, I’ve got one you can practice with.”
“My face probably can’t get any redder than it is right now, can it?”
“I don’t know. Should we try?”
“Ian, I swear if you say one more word . . .” Her finger wagged at my face. It was cute, getting her all embarrassed. Almost like foreplay, only more fun, because she was so innocent.
“Penis.” I said it again. “Just say it.”
“No!”
“Tits.”
“Oh hell,” she muttered under her breath, then started marching away. I gripped her by the elbow and tugged her back against me.
“Come on, Blake. Eventually, you’ll have to get past the point where you aren’t afraid of your own sexuality. And something tells me that David’s not going to be supergreat in bed, so you need to at least gain some confidence so you can tell him what you want.”
“What?” Blake turned, hands on hips. “What makes you think he’d be bad? I mean, I’m a virgin.”
“Yup.”
She threw her hands into the air. “So . . . I’ll suck.”
“Not possible.” I eyed her up and down. Not freaking possible. “Believe me. I know this shit. As for David? The last girlfriend who was interviewed stated that although he earned an A for effort, on more than one occasion she studied for a test during. You know? A test during.”
“During?”
“Sex.”
“How?”
“Well, the way she explained it was quite clever—she hid note cards in her pillow. Brilliant, right?”
Blake’s mouth dropped open. “But, that’s so . . . impersonal. And awful. Shouldn’t you be putting your whole body into it? Your mind? Your soul? I mean, why have sex if you aren’t going to give everything you are every single time?”
The more she talked, the harder it was to breathe.
Why indeed? Because sex felt good.
But lately, it had become monotonous, boring. And then Blake and I had kissed. And now, everything about her, even just conversation, was exhilarating and new.
Shit on a stick.
“Uh.” I cleared my throat. “We’re getting off-topic. The point is, you may need to give him direction. Meaning you may need to say words like ‘penis.’ The end.”
“Fine.” Blake closed her eyes for a few seconds, then opened them and whispered, “Penis.”
“Louder.” I grinned.
Her ears were as bright as a red crayon.
“Penis,” she said loud enough for anyone passing by to hear.
Lucky for us, one of those people just happened to be David.
“Oh, hey man.” I held out my hand for a good ol’ friendly shake. “Didn’t see you there. How’s it going?”
David’s mouth was open in, well, probably shock, that his good little bestie just uttered the name of a man part, out loud, in the business building hallway, like a pro.
“Blake?” He frowned.
“Oh, sorry!” Blake pulled off her sunglasses. “I forgot I had these on.”
“You should never cover your eyes,” he said in a low voice. “They’re your best feature.”
I laughed.
David glared.
“Oh, sorry. I thought you were kidding.”
“What? I was just thinking that if we’re naming her best feature—physical, that is, since we both know she has a killer personality—hmm.” I gave her a once-over. “I’d have to say it’s a three-way tie between her ass, tits, and hair. But hey, what do I know?”
Blake elbowed me hard in the ribs. I wasn’t trying to be crude. In fact, my intention was the exact opposite. I said trigger words to get David to look. The power of suggestion, my friends.
I clenched my teeth as David, upon hearing me say each word, took inventory, slowly, methodically. Then like a lightbulb went on in his stupid-ass head, his eyes widened, perhaps opening the rest of the way, and he took a step backward, nearly colliding with a student rushing by.
“Yeah,” he croaked and then coughed into his hand. “You’re right. Everything’s . . . perfect.”
“And mine.” I winked, stirring the pot of jealousy a bit more, trying to see how far I could push him while at the same time swelling with pride that for now, she was mine.
For now.
His head snapped in my direction. “I thought you guys were just seeing each other, nothing official.”
“Made it official last night.” I focused in on Blake’s mouth as I brought her hand to my lips. “Right, sweet cheeks?”
Expecting Blake to nod and just go with it, I wasn’t prepared for her to lean in and kiss my mouth, taking my head with both hands and forcing her tongue down my throat. But, not one to say no to kissing her, not ever, I kissed her back.
It ended too soon, once David cleared his throat.
“Sorry.” Blake actually looked embarrassed as she tucked her hair behind her ears and then grabbed her sunglasses and forced them back on in one swift, sexy move. “It was just a really good night.”
“It was,” I said, leering.