I wished he was here, so that he could see how happy he made me.
Looking up at Maddie, I saw her smiling down at me. “He can be a romantic sometimes,” she teased with a wink.
I heard myself giggle again. I was giggling. Unbelievable. Placing my hand over my mouth, I looked down at the flowers and then nodded.
“He kissed me,” I admitted, my smile so wide that my cheeks were hurting.
Maddie gasped. “What?” she squealed.
I ducked my head shyly and bit down on my lips as Maddie went crazy beside me.
“He kissed you? Alessio kissed you? When? How?”
Closing my eyes, I inhaled the sweet scent of the flowers. “Yesterday. When he brought me to the creek.”
I could still feel his lips on mine, moving gently as he held me in his arms. The kiss and our sweet moment at the creek, that was all I could think about since it happened.
And I would never forget the way he held me or kissed me. As if I meant something to him. As if I was precious. I would cherish it forever in my heart.
“Oh, Ayla,” Maddie breathed beside me. “I can’t believe this. You have no idea how happy I am.”
“I am happy too. Deliriously happy,” I whispered, my eyes still closed. “He makes me so happy, Maddie.”
Opening my eyes, I glanced up at her. “I should go thank him for the flowers!”
“Now?” Maddie asked. I nodded enthusiastically. She laughed and then stepped back.
“Go ahead, babe. He was downstairs the last time I saw him.”
“Thank you,” I replied, quickly putting on my flats, still holding the bouquet in my hands. I ran out of the room, feeling giddy. My heart was doing several flips.
I slowed down when I walked down the stairs and saw Viktor and Nikolay engaged in a heated conversation.
They stopped mid-sentence when I approached them. “Ayla,” Nikolay said in greeting. Viktor nodded and then looked at the flowers in my hands, his eyebrows going up in surprise.
“Do you know where Alessio is?” I asked softly.
I saw Nikolay’s eyebrows furrowed before he replied. “He is in his office.”
“Oh. Okay, thank you,” I gave them both a smile before walking back up.
“Wait,” Viktor called out.
Stopping in my tracks, I turned back around. “Yes?”
“Where are you going?” Nikolay asked.
“To Alessio’s office. I want to thank him for the flowers.”
Their eyes widened and they looked at each other. “No,” Nikolay quickly snapped.
“Huh?” I flinched at his tone. His expression softened at my reaction and he looked sheepish.
“That won’t be good idea,” Viktor swallowed nervously. What are they talking about?
“I won’t disturb him, promise. I will just say thank you and then leave. That’s it.” I really wanted to see him. I felt…desperate. And strangely, I had missed him.
“Maybe you can go later. He is busy right now,” Nikolay argued. Viktor nodded quickly in agreement, his expression almost pained.
My shoulders sagged in defeat and I looked down at the flowers. “Okay,” I whispered. Looking back up, I saw Nikolay and Viktor sighing in relief. Why did they look so tense?
Shrugging it off, I smiled at them again. “I will go later.”
“Yeah. Later,” Viktor agreed. Turning around, I walked back upstairs, feeling wistful. I wished I could see him right now.
Bringing the flowers to my chest again, I shook my head. “Oh, well. I will see him later,” I muttered, before burying my face in the bouquet. The feeling of defeat left me and I felt myself smiling again.
When I reached the top landing, I turned to my left toward my room, but something caught my eye to my right.
Alessio.
Swiveling around, I was about to call him when I saw someone else. Not just anyone. But Nina.
My smile was lost in an instant.
His back was turned to me so he didn’t see me. But Nina saw me and she smiled. It was devilish. It was one that was filled with triumph. She brought a hand up and laid it on Alessio’s arm and moved closer.
“Alessio,” she crooned enough for me to hear.
He was saying something in return, but I didn’t hear him. All I saw was how close Nina was. She was practically plastered to Alessio’s body.
My stomach twisted almost painfully and I took a step back. My arms fell limply beside me as my nose stung.
All the happiness, everything that I felt just seconds ago evaporated, leaving me empty.
But then I felt something I never felt before boiling inside of me, like waves crashing around me. My chest grew tight, squeezing as I continued to take steps backward.
Why did he do this?
He let me play the piano. I played for him every night. He shared the creek with me. He kissed me. He held me in his arms. And he gave me flowers. I thought we had something special.
I thought it meant something. I thought I meant something to him.
I realized I was crying. I swiped the tears away.
My heart was hurting.
Placing a hand over my mouth, I muffled any sounds that might emerge.
“I would describe it as a wave. It comes crashing in your heart with so many mixed feelings…it hurts.”
Maddie’s voice rang through my mind as I stared at Nina and Alessio. When I saw them walking into his office, I quickly turned around and blinked away the tears in frustration. I placed my hand over my chest, where my heart was raging.
I couldn’t understand. Could Maddie be right?
Was I…jealous?
Chapter 40
Under the layer of hurt and disappointment, I was angry at Alessio and at myself.
Why did I care?
It was a foreign and weird feeling coursing through my body. Anger. I didn’t remember the last time I let myself feel such emotion. I had learned how to turn off all my emotions, becoming numb to everything and everyone around me. Yet I felt hurt, disappointed, angry, and jealous.
Alessio gave me laughter, smiles, and peace. And now, in my heart, it hurt. It felt like he had taken all of that away.
I wasn’t supposed to care, but no matter how hard I tried to keep myself from getting emotionally involved, I had failed.
Looking away from the door, I stared down at the bouquet in my hand.
A sigh filled with dejection escaped past my lips, and I turned away from his office, slowly making my way to my room. Walking inside, I found Maddie sitting on my bed, with my book on her lap. Her head snapped up when she heard me.
“Ayla?” Maddie questioned, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Placing the book on the bed, she motioned me to come forward. “What’s wrong? I thought you were going to see Alessio.”
Swallowing hard against the ball of sadness, I shook my head and brought the flowers close to my chest. “He was with Nina.”
There was silence at first and then she erupted. “What?” she said, getting up angrily from the bed. “That little—”
“I didn’t get a chance to talk to him. He didn’t see me.” The image of them flashed before my eyes, causing a sudden wave of anger inside of me. I looked at the flowers and then without thinking, I threw them on the bed.