It was very wonderful. A perfect, splendid night. By the time Rose requested “Lovebird Nestle,” the orchestra was either drunk or stoned themselves. There were a couple of players who passed out. The drummer had untied his bow tie and was lying on the stage near the drum. The flute player, who was an insomniac, played a tune like a little breeze getting through a crack in the window. The piccolo sounded like a young child pinching his nose and singing like a cartoon character.
Rose and Pierrot clung to each other as they made little steps and kissed each other’s faces. They couldn’t bear to be apart, even for one moment more. They danced around, and she swooped under his arms. They put their foreheads together. They shimmied away from each other. They clung together. The few customers drinking at the ballroom that night put their elbows on the table, settled their chins in the palms of their hands and watched. This was so much like performances they had done when they were children. Except they didn’t have to go back to an orphanage afterward and sleep in separate beds.
They were adults. They could make love.
? ? ?
WHEN THE BALLROOM CLOSED, they walked down the street together.
“When I went back to the orphanage looking for you,” Pierrot said, then paused. “I saw Sister Elo?se.”
“That crazy bitch. What did she have to say?”
“She said she told you about me and her.”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“We had sex in the bathrooms.”
The spots on Rose’s cheeks began to glow bright red.
“Starting when?”
“I think when I was eleven. Yes, when I was eleven.”
“Oh, it’s not your fault, my darling. She was a lunatic. Surely you can see that?”
“You don’t think less of me?”
“If I knew it would make you feel better, I’d go there now and put a bullet right in her brain.”
“No, I don’t think I’m angry with her. It’s in the past. I just worry that it’s done something to me. That it’s rendered me in some way unlovable.”
“Don’t be silly. I will kill her for you one day.”
“Ha-ha-ha. What? Thank you, but you don’t have to.”
And then Pierrot began to weep.
“Look, since you’ve given me your secret, let me give you mine. I was a man’s mistress, as you heard, but when I left him, for money I would dress up in high heels and garter belts and make love to men dressed as zebras. And those little films are being shown in small rooms all over the world, and men are masturbating to them right now.”
“Oh, I saw you in one of those movies! You were splendid!”
? ? ?
SHE OPENED THE DOOR to the Valentine Hotel and Pierrot caught it behind her before it closed. He came right up the stairs after her. She felt like he was her shadow. She felt as if he was stitched to her. The stairs were doing marvelous things. They were so much like the stairs in dreams. They were like accordions. Some of them took an unnecessarily long time to get up. Rose could fly up some of the stairs, gravity seeming not to exist.
That was desire messing with physics: putting its finger on the record and then slowing it down, making sure you heard every word spoken, and memorized it.
When they walked into the room, Pierrot pushed Rose up against the blue wallpaper. One of her legs was around his back. As soon as he was pressed up against her, she could feel his penis. She looked down in disbelief. She unbuttoned his pants and reached down and felt it.
His jacket came off to the ground. She’d never been so excited to see someone take their clothes off. As she took off her clothes she was delighted with her own body, as though she were seeing it for the first time, and she was very pleased with what she was witnessing. She pulled her stocking off her leg and she was thrilled by how skinny it was. And then she wiggled the toes at the end of her feet, very satisfied with those too.
When Pierrot saw Rose’s tits, he grabbed them with both hands and stuffed his face between them. He pulled off his suspenders. And he was inside her before his pants had even hit the floor. The belt buckle hit the ground like an anchor.
They moved over to the bed. Pierrot held her shoulders as he pushed harder and deeper. She cried out so loudly that Pierrot was afraid the neighbors would hear. Not that he imagined they were the type to mind. They would probably quite enjoy hearing Rose’s lovemaking. But he wanted to keep it all to himself. It turned him on so much that other people hearing it would be like others seeing her naked.
He pulled out and came all over her. And when he was done, he felt like his whole body was ruined in a wonderful way. Because she had squeezed every bit of life out of him. After they were done gasping for air, they looked at each other and laughed and laughed and laughed.
He didn’t feel like a criminal for having made love to someone. How wonderful! He couldn’t quite believe that Rose was next to him. How wonderful! And she didn’t have any clothes on. How wonderful! He wanted to find her clothes and throw them out the window so that she would always be naked next to him, so that she could never go anyplace again.
“What’s your favorite color?” Pierrot asked.
“Dark blue. Almost black,” Rose answered.
“What was your favorite age?” He pressed further.
“Eleven.”
“Do you have a favorite bird?”
“A robin.”
“You seem like the type of girl who would like a robin. You appreciate what a devastatingly handsome bird it is.”
“Thanks?”