“When do I get the money?” she asked.
“They won’t be giving you the money. I’m making a trade. Jimmy Bonaventura has a bunch of buildings he bought to launder money in the red-light district. He never wanted to sell. But when the price is right, anything’s for sale. When you come back, even your hotel will be owned by me. It’s the biggest real estate grab I’ve ever made. Too bad, it could have been yours. All those cabarets. But you prefer to fall in love with junkies.”
McMahon watched Rose’s face carefully to see if she would flinch or reveal even a tiny flicker of remorse for having left him. He saw nothing.
“Even if they don’t understand this show you’re putting on, don’t feel badly. This is the first thing you’ve put together. You’re young. You’re an amateur.”
He thought he saw the color in her cheeks darken. He decided to immediately continue the condescension.
“Are you excited to meet someone like Jimmy Bonaventura? What an adventure that will be for a nothing girl like you. You can tell me all about it when you get back.”
“I don’t think so. I think I would prefer never to see your face again.”
“It’s because I broke your heart.”
“I never loved you. I was with you because I didn’t have a choice. I threw myself at you because I was terrified of poverty.”
She looked into McMahon’s eyes. She was watching his reaction carefully. People gave away secrets when they were angry. You could read their emotions when they were enraged. She knew that McMahon had arranged to have her killed. He turned without saying anything and walked away.
? ? ?
IN THE HANGAR NEXT TO THEIRS, they were manufacturing bathtubs. They were carried out on the back of a truck that day, like a school of beluga whales.
? ? ?
THE CLOWNS ROLLED the papier-maché moon down the street, from the hangar to the train tracks, which wasn’t that far, only a few hundred feet. They were laughing. They were amazed at how strong the gravitational pull of the moon was. It was heavier than usual, and given its propensity toward escapism, they were afraid the moon would for sure make a break for it this time. The moon took up half a baggage car by itself. The sides had been scuffed when it was squeezed into two large doors.
Rose looked at all the trunks piled high in the baggage car. They had everything they needed to build a brand-new universe. One trunk contained small planets and shooting stars. Another had clouds and lightning bolts and snowflakes. There was a fake ocean and a pirate ship in one. Several contained costumes for aristocrats, generals and paupers. One was filled with flaming hoops and tiny tuxedos for dogs. Each was as full of wonders as Pandora’s box.
Rose was the last to board the train. She wore a red velvet jacket and matching trousers. Once she had slid the door closed behind her, everyone in the troupe popped their heads back in from the windows, because the action was now inside. When the train began to move, everyone let out a huge whoop. They were impressed by the sheer realness of all of it. This was the train she and Pierrot had been sitting on when they were very little, though then it was an imaginary train, heading to an imaginary place. Now it weighed thousands of pounds and could run over anything in its path.
? ? ?
THEY ARRIVED AT THE BORDER in under an hour. The longer part of the trip would happen after they crossed. But getting past customs was the real challenge.
The customs officers took a peek into each baggage car. They all looked the same as the baggage cars of American troupes and circuses that came up north across the border. The custom officers laughed at the moon. It was scratched and dented from rolling down the sidewalk. But this seemed to make it look more like the real moon: nothing more than a dented hand mirror up in the sky. One of the officers shook hands with a Chihuahua. The officers smiled to themselves. In their minds, the boxes contained only the components of a wonderful show. They wished the troupe luck.
When Rose showed their papers and the train was then waved across the border, she knew the whole world was hers.
? ? ?
SHE WALKED DOWN the shaky corridor of the train. The landscape was flashing by through the square windows. There was so much land, open and empty. All the trees stood there, naked without leaves, their arms supplicating the sky. They were so chaotic and full of longing.