Which is why he wouldn’t have a need to spend a second night with any of them.
But maybe it would have been worth it. Maybe just that one night would have made me happy.
I couldn’t keep the pestering thoughts at bay. I hit the drain and got out of the tub while the water was still warm. Ann-Marie was still in her bedroom, but the music was off. I crept to my bedroom, got dressed for bed and set my clothes out for my shift the next day. I set the alarm on my phone, and without really thinking about it, found myself opening Instagram.
But it wasn’t my feed I ended up browsing. It was my own posts. I laid on my back in bed and found my uploads from over a year before. It was masochistic, but I couldn’t stop myself.
Eighteen months before, ninety percent of my Instagram posts revolved around one topic: my relationship. It was all Jesse, Jesse, Jesse. Me and Jesse on the ferry. Me and Jesse getting frozen yogurt. Me and Jesse at his family’s cabin in the Poconos. In each photo, he grinned at the camera, gorgeous with his sandy blond hair and deep-set dimples. Looking back, I almost felt sorry for myself. Maybe I was obsessed with our relationship, enamored to an unhealthy degree with the best boyfriend I’d ever had.
Because when he left, things were bad for me. Really bad. I fell into a month-long depression. Maybe if I had been a little more objective about our relationship, admitted that we might not be forever, I would have been able to deal with the fallout.
But that wasn’t me. That had never been me.
And that was how I knew I couldn’t do a one-night stand. Even the drunken hookup with my coworker messed me up, and I wasn’t into the guy. I just had this tendency to get attached. Hard.
I plugged my phone in to charge and turned off all the lights but the salt lamp in the corner. Back in bed, I rolled onto my side and stared at the familiar glow as I fell asleep.
I did the right thing, I reminded myself. I did the right thing.
But no amount of assurances could rid my mind of those piercing gray eyes.
CHAPTER FOUR
Xavier
Despite it being almost two, the night was still in full swing as I made my way across the club. One more minute in the office with Seth, and I might have killed myself.
The guy and I had never really gotten along. The only reason he was part of this whole operation — the list and Enigma — was because he was Davis’ cousin. I kept things civil between us simply because starting shit would make me look bad. But, Jesus, the things that guy said sometimes… he sounded just like the spoiled, billionaire brat, frat boy that he was. Seth had never worked a day in his life, and that fact was written all over him.
I did another once-over of the club, just in case Riley had returned during the short amount of time it took me to leave the security camera feed and walk to the main floor. She was nowhere to be found.
Irritation climbed through my chest like a thorn-covered vine. I leaned against the end of the counter and caught Mikey’s eye. The young bartender hustled over to me.
“Everyone happy tonight?” I asked.
“Yes, sir,” he smiled. “It’s a great night.”
“Good,” I murmured. My eyes slid past him and settled on a young woman halfway down the bar. She was hot, but that wasn’t the reason she caught my attention. It was the tight smile she wore. The way she turned in her seat, trying to avoid the man standing next to her.
I took an empty stool a couple seats down from the two and turned my ear to them. The music made it hard to hear their whole conversation, but snippets made their way to me.
“...I bought you a drink,” the guy said.
“...didn’t ask...” the girl responded, leaning even farther away from him.
My fingers curled up and dug into my palms. It was a conversation I’d heard a hundred times. There were different versions of it, but they were all the same at the core. A douche walks into a bar, takes a look around, and decides he can have any woman he wants. When girls don’t comply, he takes it upon himself to pressure them into spending time with him.
I was an avid participant in the chase. And I’d never win Boyfriend of the Year, on account of never having been someone’s boyfriend. But I didn’t pressure women. I didn’t push them to do something they didn’t want to.
Ever.
If a girl said no, I fucking listened. And I couldn’t stand men who didn’t do the same. They were scum, not worthy of sharing oxygen with the rest of us.
I slid my eyeline sideways and caught sight of the girl’s face. She pushed hair behind her ear and reached for her purse. Her jaw was tight, but her eyes betrayed her fear and pain.
Quick as a whip, a memory from long ago took me over. I saw my mother’s eyes, so like the girl’s in front of me. She cowered on the floor under my father, waiting for him to hit her again. And I stood there, watching the whole thing, powerless to do anything about it.
It was a flashback that was as clear and real as the present moment. I took a deep breath and pushed it away. I wasn’t seven anymore. I was a grown man. I was thirty years old. And I didn’t put up with shit.
The girl started to walk away from the bar, but the skeevy dude stepped in front of her and blocked her way. He folded his arms and gave her a satisfied grin, like he’d won the game and there was nothing she could do about it.
I pushed away from the bar and walked over to them.
“Good evening,” I said, stepping up close to the woman. “I’m sorry to bother you folks, but there have been reports of stolen purses at the club tonight. Have either of you seen any suspicious characters around?”
The man looked at me in annoyance. In contrast, the girl seemed relieved. “No,” she said. “I don’t think so.”
“Ah, I see.” I smiled at her. “Well, sorry to bother you. May I offer you a drink on the house?”
Her eyes darted to the asshole next to me. “No thanks. I, uh, I need to be leaving. My friends are waiting for me.”
I nodded. “Have a good night.”
She rushed away. The guy took a step to go after her, but I grabbed his arm. “What about you? A bottle on the house?”
This stopped him in his tracks. He only needed a second to consider. “All right, man. Yeah.”
I directed him to a table and gestured for Mikey to send a bottle over. The free alcohol was only a ruse, of course. I had another, more fulfilling, plan up my sleeve. Just thinking about it made adrenaline shoot through my veins.
I found one of the guards and pointed Mr. Douche out. “Kick him out in five,” I instructed. “Into the alley. Just be discreet about it. We don’t need anyone asking questions like last time.”