The List

I pulled myself to my feet and ran from side to side, stern to bow and saw nothing. Only the rain thrashed the water’s surface; no pale arms, no glorious mantle of hair, no Auggie. I screamed over the wind, only to have my words carried away in the shriek of the Valkyries who had brought the wind down upon us.

Desperately, I jumped below, but there was nothing but a riot of broken dishes and belongings tossed about. Auggie was nowhere to be found.

I lowered the keel and completely dropped the sail, then started the motor. In a flash of horror, I turned it back off, afraid she might be caught in the blades. I couldn’t steer without headway so I grabbed a life ring and jumped into the churning water around the motor to see if she was about. I saw nothing. I hefted myself back aboard and started the motor, trying desperately to find the location on shore I’d previously fixed my sight upon as refuge. I had no idea how long I’d been unconscious or how far the boat might have drifted.

My heart was screaming and salty tears added to the rain drenching my face. “Auggie! Auggie!” I grabbed the radio mic and called in an SOS but this wasn’t the ocean. The only help might be a small outboard patrolled by the Fish and Game Department to catch those without a fishing license. Hopefully, I could find her before they became my best chance.

I shielded my eyes and looked in every direction. Auggie could swim, but I had no way of knowing if she’d been knocked unconscious when the boat listed and she’d gone over. I finally recognized the intended point of focus on the shore through the sheets of blowing rain and headed in roughly that direction so I could circle about and hopefully find my original position.

I screamed into the wind and it blew my pleas for help back against my face. The lake was not terribly deep, nor was it very broad from east to west. This gave the wind-driven waves little room to play out and the result was waves folding over waves.

Then, just as suddenly as it hit, the wind stopped and the black bank of clouds was now to the east. The water settled, only a mild rain persisting. I could see now and steered in concentric circles looking for her. I was hoarse by now and couldn’t get my voice louder than a whisper. I realized it was not so much strained vocal chords as the tension and terror that paralyzed them. Auggie was nowhere to be seen. No thrashing, no debris, nothing.

Another boat, an outboard with two fishermen saw my arms waving through the rain. They’d evidently been caught in it too, and came closer. “Everything okay?” one of them called. I motioned him closer and managed to get out that my wife had gone overboard and I couldn’t find her. They waved acknowledgement and pointed that they would work a zig-zag to the west and I was to do the same to the east of the point where we’d met.

I was frantic. Every kiss, every time I’d held her, every time I’d seen her emerald eyes now ran before me. I would have gladly given my life in exchange, if she would just surface and wave to me, smiling that she was okay.

Leaning as far as I could over the side while still steering, I drove the appointed course and then heard a voice in the distance. Following the sound, I saw the fishermen. They were a few hundred yards from me, close to the shore’s edge. Throwing the motor into full, I raced to them, my heart hammering in excitement and dread. As I came closer, I saw a body lying in the weedy sand at the water’s edge. I killed the motor and dove into the water, swimming for all I was worth toward her.

I reached her and felt for a pulse. She was alive! I rolled her over and began CPR, thanking God for the summer of lifeguard duty I’d taken while in college, as well as the med school background. The fishermen had brought their boat ashore and stood by, looking helpless. The look on their faces turned my soul cold.

I continued CPR, pumping Auggie’s chest, her lovely shirt torn and weedy. Her hair was likewise filled with grasses and for all the world, she looked drowned, but I would not give up.

In the space of my heartbeat, she moved and her mouth opened to gasp for air and to retch lake water out of her lungs. I rejoiced and held her sitting up so she wouldn’t aspirate on the vomit. The men put their hands over their heads in a clasp of prayer and shouted, “Thank you, Jesus” as I cried. I was raw and my head was bleeding openly, but my Auggie was alive!

The fishermen climbed back into their boat and made for my sailboat, climbing aboard and using the radio to call for the local fire and rescue. It seemed like only moments passed before I heard the rail of a siren coming closer and then there were men in fireman’s gear everywhere. I was bent over Auggie, my blood dripping on her torso and while she looked at me, her eyes were blank, her mouth silent. I realized she was probably in shock. The EMTs reached us by this time and once they determined that the blood on Auggie was not from her, but me, they clamped her in protective, isolative gear that prevented her from moving her head or limbs. I was likewise “packaged” and loaded on hand-carried litters until we reached an ambulance helicopter which flew us side by side to Louisville. The small hospital near the lake was not prepared to handle head injuries and Louisville had state-of-the-art diagnostic equipment.

I lost sight of Auggie after the flight and it wasn’t until later that afternoon that Auggie’s dad, Walter, and Mom came in to see me. Mom’s face was frozen in concern, but I assured her that I was stitched and x-rayed and mostly just there for observation. I asked immediately after Auggie and saw them exchange glances.

“She’ll be fine,” was all they said and I knew they were holding back.

“What’s wrong?” I demanded to know.

Walter cleared his throat and put his hand over mine on the bed. “Worth, Auggie is whole but there has been some swelling in her brain. They say they have it under control but have put her into a drug-induced coma to reduce the damage. She’s in ICU right now and will be for the next few days.”

“Oh my god!” I tried to sit up, but Walter pushed me flat.

“Worth! She’s asleep right now and there’s nothing you can do to help her except to rest and recover yourself.”

I tried again to sit up, but his hand was firm. “Listen to me!” he said. “Get hold of yourself! Worth! Lay down now and don’t aggravate your injury. She’ll be fine and is in good hands right now. Let her rest.” I glared at him. “Look,” he said in a calming voice. “Don’t you think if there was a danger or something that could be done, I’d be in there with her right now?”

This got through to me. I gathered my thoughts despite the hammering in my head. He was right. When I had tried to sit up, the room started to swim. I needed to do the smart thing and recover. I knew the neurologists and staff at this hospital. She was in the best hands possible. They’d done some groundbreaking accomplishments here. We were lucky it was the closest to us. Then another thought occurred to me. “Ford! He’ll hear about it. It will be on the news.”