I started to believe it again.
After we passed through the archway entrance, fifteen acres of green space, statues, forts, and artifacts stretched out in front of us. Somewhere beyond them was the bay where Ponce de Leon had landed in search of gold and a legend. Not far from us now was the old Spring House, which sheltered the Fountain of Youth. For something I’d waited so long to see, it felt a great deal like other parks I’d visited. Part of me expected to see grandparent-aged children frolicking through Roman-style marble baths.
I wasn’t sure where to start, but everyone looked at me to decide.
“Spring House?” Max asked.
I hesitated. “Let’s save that until last.”
“Statue?” Gray asked, but he’d already started in the direction of the old conquistador.
Gina let go of me and caught up with him. Likewise, Max settled into the space beside me. We wandered along the paved paths and sometimes off them. I allowed myself the freedom to feel everything and remember whatever I wanted, like a parade marching through my brain.
Gina. Skipping. With her arm looped through mine.
Gray. The vase of history I’d buried in the pine needles.
Big. An empty stuffed ostrich.
The anniversary. Today.
The list. Shrinking.
Max. Invader. Explorer. Culprit?
When I looked up, the golden statue of Ponce, mounted on a large stone base, loomed over me. I stood in the conquistador’s shadow and imagined him landing here for the first time.
The early explorers were cruel and ruthless. They were also brave sons of bitches. I envied the hell out of them for their small Earth and expanding maps. What was left to discover these days? Fashion trends and the next social media quick fix?
As I stared up at that big statue, I wondered how long it had taken him to get his land legs back under him after his voyage. Did he kiss the ground and thank God and the king for traveling mercies? Did he look for an immediate fight with the natives? Or did he wonder the same thing I was wondering now?
Was there really healing in all this water?
“What do you think Trent would have said?” I asked Gina.
“Probably something like ‘Sadie May, what shall we explore next? Machu Picchu? Angkor Wat?’”
Her impression was dead-on.
“You nailed that.”
“I knew him pretty well.”
She did. I was glad she remembered that.
“He’d have laughed when I told him those places were a long way away.”
She tilted her head to the sky. “I can almost hear him.”
I thought I could too.
Max chimed in. “The height and depth and width of the universe—how immeasurable it was—always energized him. I wish he’d had a chance to travel.”
Even that sounded more like Trent than Max. No one added to his statement. We drifted away from one another. Drifted into our memories.
Someone touched my shoulder.
“It’s just me,” Max said, jumping back as I jerked.
“Can we talk?” I asked.
“I was coming to ask you the same thing,” he said.
I consulted the park map and yelled to Gina and Gray that Max and I were walking toward Ponce’s landing spot. He slipped his hand into mine.
I wondered if we’d ever walk this way again.
I hoped we would.
I’d forgiven Gina. Gray and I had been civil all day. I could forgive Max if I needed to. Right?
When we were bayside, I chose a bench and sat down cross-legged, facing sideways. The sun-heated wood warmed my skin through my jeans. Max sat across from me. Sweat gathered in the edges of his sideburns. It was pretty damn hot out here, I thought, tugging at the middle of my shirt.
“I wanted to tell you I’m sorry,” he said, and then clarified. “That I doubted we should all come here. This was a good choice. You’ve wanted to forgive them, and this is a huge step in that direction.”
I couldn’t hold on to the words any longer. “I saw the envelopes in the truck.”