Eunice listened in horror.
“But that wasn’t what he wanted at all,” she whispered tearfully. “He told me what he wanted. He was the love of my life.”
And now, right at the last, she was going to fail him.
Pauline was good at listening and mopping up tears. It was her job. But deep inside her sensible suit and her easy-iron blouse beat the brave heart of a maverick. Back in the day, her blond bob had been a pink Mohican and her nose still bore the tiny scar of a safety-pin piercing. She handed Eunice another tissue.
“All the boys are out at a big funeral this afternoon. I wouldn’t normally do this but . . . Follow me!”
She led Eunice through from the reception area down a corridor past the staff kitchen, the Chapel of Rest, and various other rooms to the place where the cremation remains were stored awaiting collection. From one of the shelves she took down an impressive wooden urn and checked the label.
“Here he is,” she said gently. She checked her watch. “I’m going to leave you alone with him for a bit to pay your respects. The boys won’t be back for another hour, so you won’t be disturbed.”
Less than an hour later, Eunice was sitting on a train with Bomber’s ashes in a Huntley & Palmers biscuit tin on the seat beside her. She had had to think and act fast after Pauline had left her. She found a plastic carrier bag and a biscuit tin in the little kitchen where Pauline had made tea. She emptied the biscuits into the bag and then tipped Bomber into the biscuit tin. She refilled the urn with the biscuits, but it was too light. Frantically searching for additional ballast, she found a box of decorative gravel samples in one of the other rooms. She threw in a couple of large handfuls and then screwed the lid back on as tightly as she could and returned the urn to its shelf. As she made her way out through the reception area clutching the biscuit tin, Pauline didn’t look up from her desk, but raised her thumbs to Eunice in a good-luck gesture. She hadn’t seen a thing.
As the guard blew his whistle, Eunice patted the tin affectionately and smiled.
“Brighton it is.”
Laura was astonished. She picked up the tin and gave it a gentle shake. It was certainly heavy.
“Don’t shake it!” said Sunshine. “You’ll wake him up.” And then she giggled at her own joke.
Laura was wondering what else might be lurking in the dark corners of the study.
“No wonder this place is haunted,” she said to Sunshine.
After lunch, Laura helped her to post the details on the website, but this was one thing she was fairly certain no one would come forward to claim.
That evening, Freddy, Laura, Sunshine, Carrot, Stella, and Stan had a celebratory dinner in the garden of the Moon Is Missing, to mark the birthday of the website. Sunshine was full of stories about all the things that were currently posted, but most especially about the biscuit tin.
“It’s certainly a queer thing to lose,” said Stella, tucking into her crumb-dusted, sautéed crayfish tails with hand-cut chips. “And why on earth would you put your loved one in a biscuit tin?”
“Perhaps that’s just it, love,” said Stan. “Perhaps the bloke in the tin wasn’t particularly loved and someone was just trying to get rid of him.”
“Perhaps it’s not human remains at all. Maybe it just the sweepings out of somebody’s fireplace. That’s exactly what it looks like,” said Freddy, taking a long swig of his ice-cold beer.
Sunshine was about to remonstrate with him, when he winked at her and she realized he was only joking.
“It is a dead person and he was the love of her life and she will come and get him,” she replied defiantly.
“Okay,” he replied. “Let’s have a bet. What do you want to bet me that someone will come and get the biscuit tin?”
Sunshine screwed up her face in concentration and fed Carrot a couple of chips while she was thinking about it. Suddenly a huge smile lit up her face and she leaned back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest with a sigh of victorious satisfaction.
“You have to marry Laura.”
Laura spilled her wine in shock.
“Steady on, old girl,” said Stan. “Blimey, Sunshine, you certainly know how to frighten the horses.”
Laura could feel her face reddening. Stella and Stan were chuckling merrily and Sunshine was grinning from ear to ear. Laura wished that the ground would open up and swallow her, and so swallowed her wine too quickly and ordered another large glass. Freddy said nothing. He looked as though he was somewhere between annoyed and disappointed, but then when he saw Laura’s face, he leaped to his feet and thrust his hand out to Sunshine.