—
Later that week, I was in the basement on my computer wasting time, which I was becoming an expert at—it was amazing how long I could spend on Twitter and Facebook, going from one random article to the next. I’d just gone down a rabbit hole that involved articles about what the members of the Baby-Sitters Club would be doing as adults, when I heard Jimmy call my name from the top of the stairs. I walked over and looked up.
“I have to make a Costco run to get some stuff for Viv’s party,” he said. “Want to join?”
“Sure,” I said. “Give me two minutes.” Ash was at her mom’s and Matt and Katie were in the office, but we were pulling out of the driveway before I realized that Jimmy hadn’t told Matt where we were going. “He’s working on my talking points for the radio interview next week, and all three suggestions I made were shot down quickly. So I figured I’d let him handle it. I mean, what do I know? I’m just the actual candidate.”
—
Jimmy whistled in Costco as he pushed the giant cart through the aisles. He stopped at a display of televisions, and I said, “I thought we were getting stuff for Viv’s party.”
He sighed. “We are, but Costco is about the experience.” He put his arm around my shoulders as if he were a wise man trying to teach me something important, and he kept wheeling the cart along with his free hand. “You need to be open to new things, ready to be so dazzled by a Vitamix blender that you buy it on the spot.”
I laughed. “So you’re responsible for that blender?”
“They made smoothies in the store and gave samples to everyone. I was hooked.”
“Have you used it?” I asked.
“All in good time, Beth.” Jimmy stopped to put a large container of cheese puffs into the cart and I asked him if Ash had given him a list, since I was pretty sure she’d sooner die than set out a bowl of cheese puffs for guests. “Not exactly,” he said. “It’s more of a surprise.”
“Right,” I said. “How do you think that’ll go over?”
Jimmy shrugged. “She can’t be more pissed than she is now.”
An elderly couple passed us, and Jimmy smiled at them. “How’re y’all doing today?” he asked, and they smiled back and said they were doing just fine. I could tell that they thought we were married, that they assumed Jimmy was my husband from the way they looked at us, which of course made sense—we were both wearing wedding rings and shopping at Costco together on a weekday afternoon.
“You should appreciate this,” Jimmy said, as the couple moved down the aisle ahead of us. “This is what’s so great about Texas. Giant stores with giant carts where you can buy huge bottles of whiskey and a seventy-two-pack of frozen taquitos.”
“You know they have Costco everywhere, right? There was one in DC.”
“It’s not the same,” he said. He looked at me out of the corners of his eyes. “So, how’s things? You’re going home next weekend, right?”
“Yeah, just to see my parents for a couple of days. I haven’t been back since Thanksgiving so I thought it would be nice.”
“It must be so strange to have two nice parents,” Jimmy said, taking a bag of party mix off the shelf and then returning it.
“You have two nice parents,” I said.
“Beth, please. You don’t have to pretend. We both know my father is a giant dick.” My face must have looked shocked, because he laughed and said, “Calm down. I said he is a giant dick not has a giant dick.”
“Good God,” I said. The couple who had just moments ago smiled at us like we were adorable turned around with disapproving looks on their faces. “Maybe you can say dick louder so the whole store can hear you,” I suggested. Jimmy opened his mouth like he was going to scream, and I hit his arm. “Don’t. I was kidding.” We walked a little farther and I said, “I’m not agreeing with you, but I can see how he’s hard on you.”
“Hard is one word for it. He actually just really doesn’t like most people. But he is enamored with your boy-wonder husband.”
“They really do seem to get along, don’t they?”
“Like gangbusters.”
“It’s weird. I feel like lately Matt’s more excited to spend time with your dad than with anyone else.”
Jimmy looked at me seriously for a few seconds, and I thought he was going to say something more about Matt, but he just put his arm back around my shoulders and said, “Come on. Let’s get you a giant tub of animal crackers.”
—
Ash was perfectly pleasant on Viv’s birthday, but she did dress the baby in a T-shirt that said BIRTHDAY GIRL on the front and told every person we met at the gumbo festival that Viv’s first birthday party had been delayed for the campaign. “But we don’t mind,” she said, smiling and squishing Viv’s cheeks. “We just want to show our support for Daddy, don’t we, baby girl?”