Bah, he’d never been such a fool. Never lost his head over a woman. Bluidy hell, why did it have to be this one—a woman he wasn’t meant to have?
Johanna deserved a far different life than what she’d find as his bride. She deserved a man who’d spend his evenings by her side, not charging off on the next mission…and the next. The lass deserved a man who could be a father to the bairn and offer a contented, stable life, not the existence he’d led for so many years. God above, when had he ever truly felt content? He’d spent years fulfilling his duty, chasing down one artifact or another, doing battle with those who would corrupt ancient treasures for their own foul purposes. How could he ever expect Johanna to endure the sacrifices life at his side would entail?
No, Johanna deserved more. More than he could give. He couldn’t cast his duty to the Order aside, no matter how much he desired her.
No matter how much he needed her in his arms, night after night. His chest felt like it would cave in at the idea of not having her with him until the end of his days.
She’d shared passion in his arms. They’d uttered no words of love. No vows. Not even a syllable that hinted at an enduring bond. He could expect nothing more. It was for the best. He had to let her go.
The door groaned on its hinges.
He damn near jumped from the bed and rushed to her. Instead, he watched Johanna tiptoe inside. She quietly closed the door. He’d let her set the pace. If only he could convince his body to follow along with his good intentions. At the moment, his cock had other ideas.
He dragged in a breath, willing himself to give her the reins.
Her gaze locked with his. A smile, subtle and teasing and hot enough to make him even harder, curved her mouth. The slow, deliberate sweep of her sapphire gaze over his body heated his blood. His arousal surged against the length of plaid he’d wrapped around his hips after leaving his bath. The tilt of her mouth intensified, and those beautiful blue eyes darkened as she took him in. Knowing the effect the very thought of her had on him. Understanding how he wanted her. Delighting in her power over him.
His hunger urged him to go to her. To sweep her onto the bed, bare her curves to the firelight and his ravenous eyes, and sheathe himself in her warmth until the break of dawn.
But patience would have its own wicked reward.
She crossed soundlessly over the rug, stilling when she reached the edge of the bed. One hand went to the sash of her prim dressing gown. The blue of the fabric matched her eyes. She was lovely. Still, he wanted the robe gone. He wanted to see her lush body. And nothing else.
Slowly…achingly so, as if she intended her movements as a sensual torture, she slipped the garment from her shoulders.
The dressing gown pooled around her feet. A thin chemise stood between her flesh and his gaze. In the hearth’s glow, her nipples pebbled against the creamy cotton. His cock prodded the makeshift kilt that draped his body, and her vixen smile broadened.
Johanna peeled the shift from her body. It joined the dressing gown on the floor.
Firelight danced over her luscious, round breasts. Her nipples stood proud, inviting his touch. Connor clenched his hands. He’d go slowly. He’d make every minute of this night count.
She’d left her hair pinned up, tendrils still damp from her bath framing her cheeks. Lovely. Sweetly rounded perfection, that face of hers. He came to his feet. Threading his fingers through her loose topknot, he worked the silky locks free. Coppery waves tumbled over her shoulders, even as Johanna’s blue eyes flashed in unspoken seduction.
“Ye’re perfect,” he said, unable to stop himself.
She only smiled as her palms pressed to his bare chest. With a featherlight touch, she spread her fingertips over his skin, tenderly exploring his body.
And then, she kissed him. Looping her arms around his neck, she pressed her satin lips to his. If he lived a hundred years, he’d never taste anything as delicious as Johanna’s kiss.
“I trust I’m not disturbing you,” she murmured against his mouth.
“I’ve no desire to sleep, leannan.”
His hands encircled her middle, easily spanning her waist. Next to his big body, she was small. Delicate. But never fragile. No, Johanna could give as good as she got. Challenging a man. Facing what lay ahead with courage and spirit.
Dipping his head, he kissed her. The taste of her lips intoxicated him. He wanted her. And only her. For the rest of his days.
A little moan escaped that delectable mouth. Her scent—rosewater and woman—filled him. She canted her hips, cradling him against her rounded softness. His demanding erection hardened. He didn’t think he could get any hungrier for her but she pressed her sweet body closer. Granite had nothing on his cock. She’d drive him bluidy mad with those gentle, teasing movements. Christ, he needed her.