“I don’t think Mira’s the type who will ever ‘get used to’ being put down,” said Cedric. I thought about the dark glitter of her eyes and was inclined to agree with him.
“Be that as it may, you’ve thrown away both commissions. You’ll be lucky to get anything for them in Adoria—unless you can get Adelaide to close her mouth long enough for us to marry her off. She’s pretty enough to snare some fool. The Sirminican is too,” Jasper added, almost grudgingly. “There’s nothing wrong with your eyes, I’ll give you that. It’s the rest of you I don’t know about. Letting you procure this year was a bad idea. You should’ve stayed here with your classes. Maybe a few more years would have taught you some sense.”
“What’s done is done,” said Cedric.
“I suppose so. Well, I have to finish up some paperwork, and then I’ll meet you at the carriage. We need to check on Swan Ridge.”
I heard the sounds of Jasper’s footsteps departing and waited for Cedric to do the same. Instead, he moved forward, coming into my view as he looked at the same painting I’d admired before. I froze where I was, praying he wouldn’t look off to his side. After several moments, he sighed and turned to follow his father. And as he did, he caught sight of me in his periphery. Before I could draw another breath, he darted into my little alcove, trapping me between him and the wall.
“You! What in Ozhiel’s name have you done?” he hissed, pitching his voice low. “What are you doing here?”
“Um, getting ready to be part of the new nobility.”
“I’m serious! Where’s Ada?” he demanded.
“Long gone,” I said, with a shrug. “Guess you’re stuck with me. Besides, I thought you wanted to see me again?”
“When I said that, I meant that I wanted—” He stopped that thought, looking only briefly flustered as countless unvoiced possibilities lingered tantalizingly in the air between us. His composure was back in moments. “My lady, this isn’t a game. You have no business here! I was supposed to get Ada.”
“And I’m telling you, she’s long gone. I gave her some money and sent her on her way. She’ll be happily milking cows in no time.” My words were bold—impertinent, as Jasper would no doubt say—but inside, I was panicked. Cedric had covered for me in Osfro, but this wasn’t over yet. “I helped you by coming here. Ada would’ve probably bolted on her own. Wouldn’t you have gotten in trouble for showing up short a girl?”
“Do you know how much trouble I’ll get in for smuggling away a countess? They’ll imprison me! Presuming your husband-to-be doesn’t just kill me himself.” Seeing my surprise, he said, “Yes, I know about your engagement, my lady. I read the society papers.”
“Then you should know you’re in no real danger from Lionel. He’s not the violent type—unless you’re an itch.”
“Do you think my future’s a joke? Is all of this a joke to you?”
I met his gaze, looking unblinkingly into those gray-blue eyes. “Actually, this is anything but a joke. This is my future too. My chance to be free and make my own choices.”
He shook his head. “You don’t realize what you’ve done—what you may have cost me. I have so much depending on this, more than you can know.”
“I haven’t cost you anything. Help me with this—don’t betray me, and I’ll owe you a favor.” I caught hold of his sleeve. “Haven’t you ever known something in your heart, known you needed to do something or be somewhere? That’s how this is for me. I need to do this. Help me, and I swear, I’ll make it up to you some day.”
A fleeting smile played over his lips. “The Countess of Rothford could have done a lot more for me than a simple girl bound for Adoria.”
“You’d be surprised. The Countess of Rothford couldn’t do much for herself, let alone anyone else.” I looked up at him through my lashes. “And don’t assume I’m simple.”
He made no response and instead studied me for a long time. We were in very close quarters, which gave that scrutiny a disconcertingly intimate feel. “This will be harder than you think,” he said at last.
“I doubt it,” I said, putting my hands on my hips. “All those things you’re teaching the other girls? I already know them. I could teach classes in this place.”
“Yes. That’s exactly the problem. You know too much. Your manners, your diction—even your hair.”
“I wish everyone would stop talking about my hair,” I muttered.
“You stand out, my lady. This is a world you don’t understand—where you can’t wield the privilege you’ve known. Where your title won’t get you access or even let you be taken seriously in some places. And there are plenty of things the other girls know that you don’t. Can you start a fire in the hearth? Can you even dress yourself?”
“I put this on myself,” I told him. “I mean, the buttons took a little figuring out, but I eventually did it.”
He looked like he was on the verge of rolling his eyes. “My lady, you have no idea what—”