The Friends We Keep

Lindsey’s smile faded. “I’m the real-estate agent your wife called. I’m here to look over the house. For when you list it?”


Rob looked between them. “I see.”

Hayley had no idea what to say. Rob wasn’t an idiot. He would figure out that she’d done all this behind his back. He would know why, too. Because he didn’t want to sell the house. He didn’t want her to keep trying to have a baby. He wanted her to give up.

Lindsey hesitated a second, as if sensing tension and not sure if she should say anything. Then she smiled again. “All right. I’ll see myself out. Hayley, I’ll be touch.”

The door closed behind her.

The house was quiet. Hayley heard the refrigerator kick on. She waited for Rob to say something. When he didn’t, she wondered if he was expecting her to speak first. Maybe to apologize.

She knew that it was wrong to go behind his back, but it wasn’t as if she was going to sell the house without his permission. She just wanted to get all her facts together. They needed the money. He had to see that.

“I forgot my lunch,” he said, at last looking at her. “I came home to get it.”

“Oh.”

Rob walked past her to the kitchen. He collected his lunch from the refrigerator, then walked back to the front door and opened it.

“I can’t believe you’d do something like this,” he said, staring out at their yard. “I knew having a baby was important to you, but I didn’t think...” He swallowed. “The doctor was really clear, Hayley. You can’t get pregnant again. You need surgery.”

“I’m not going to have it. I don’t care what she said. I want to try the treatment in Switzerland.” Her voice was pleading. “Rob, you have to understand that I need to do this. Having a baby is the most important thing to me. It always has been. We need this.”

He looked at her for a long time. “Whatever happened when you were growing up has nothing to do with us now. We don’t need a baby, Hayley. Not to be happy. We need each other. We need our marriage to work.”

“I need the baby.”

“More than anything. Yeah. I got that.” He shook his head. “I’ll see you tonight.”

Hayley waited until he’d driven away before leaving herself. She felt unsettled inside, and a little scared. Rob wasn’t the type to scream, but he’d been too calm and quiet. He had to be mad.

As she drove home after work that afternoon, she tried to figure out what she was going to say. Maybe if she admitted she’d been wrong to talk to the agent without him, he would understand. If not, she was back to where she always was, trying to explain the emptiness inside her. The need to connect on a biological level. She knew nothing about her birth family. The adoption had been closed and she’d been unable to find out anything. She was a single entity in a sea of connected families. She wanted what most everyone else took for granted.

Just one baby. Was that asking too much? A baby of her own. Of their own.

She pulled onto their street and was surprised to find Rob’s car already in the driveway.

The fact that he was early could be both good and bad. He probably wanted to talk, but maybe he’d realized why they had to do this. Maybe he finally understood just how much she needed to have a child of her own. To not adopt or foster. To give birth.

The living room was empty. She heard noises coming from the bedroom and went down the small hallway.

A suitcase lay open on the bed, shirts and slacks lying next to it. Socks and underwear filled part of it. Rob walked in from the bathroom, jeans and T-shirts draped over his arm.

“You’re home,” he said. “Good. I didn’t want to have to leave a note.”

Her heart raced. She felt each breath as if it were a unique sensation. There wasn’t pain, but there was something. Something that left a bitter, metallic taste—like blood—on her tongue.

“You’re leaving.” Not a question. Of course he was leaving—the man had a suitcase. You didn’t pack a suitcase if you weren’t leaving.

He started folding clothes. “I’ll get the rest of my stuff over the weekend.”

“Rob, you can’t just go.”

“I have to.”

“But we’re married.” You love me. She nearly said the words, then thought perhaps that wasn’t the best argument right now.

He put down the half-folded shirt and faced her. His mouth was straight, his jaw determined. He wasn’t angry. Maybe resigned? “I love you, Hayley. You’re right. We’re married and I thought we were a team. But what you did today... I can’t forgive that.”

“I wasn’t going to sell the house without talking to you. I wanted information so we could make a decision together. I was just getting information.”

“You think that matters? You lied to me. You didn’t want to fix up this place for us. You planned to sell it all along. I thought we were making a start. A fresh start. We talked about the yard and the bathrooms. It was all a crock. You betrayed more than me. You betrayed us.”