The tension drained from Emery’s face. “She knew about your parents.”
“She was there through it all, including the time when I wanted to kill my dad.”
Emery blinked a few times. “You mean you thought about it.”
“I mean I tried to.” Forget wading in. He dove right off the cliff. He skipped over the details about the nights of hiding and following. All the time he logged on the shooting range. The stacks of paper outlining plan after plan for getting the job done. But he hit the highlight. The part she might never forget, and he had no idea why he took that risk.
“That’s what Quint saved you from doing.” She didn’t touch him, but she didn’t bolt either.
“He got through when Shauna couldn’t.” As soon as he said her name her face flashed in his mind. The wounded expression he had to claim. He promised never to hurt another woman like that again, which meant staying detached. “You can imagine how that blows a marriage apart.”
“I’m sorry.”
“She’s much happier now.” She had to be because she was pretty miserable with him.
“Are you?”
No one ever asked him that before, but he still didn’t hesitate. “Happiness hasn’t been all that important to me.”
Emery shook her head. “You scare me when you say things like that.”
He’d never had anyone state a preference for something other than honesty before. “Why?”
“I think a part of you truly believes that nonsense.” She moved in even closer, bridging the gap between them. Shutting out the distance until their body heat swirled around them. “People deserve happiness, Levi. You deserve it.”
“Okay.” He increased his stance. Brought her right between his legs until she leaned against him.
“Tell me your real name.” Still she didn’t touch him. She tucked her hands in her back pockets but maintained that last bit of emotional distance.
He should have seen that one coming. Dancing around questions about his past. Talking about mundane things like the house. She’d been moving in, circling as she waited for the right time to ask the one thing that mattered to her.
He applauded the skill. But that didn’t mean he wanted to cough up the information. “Why?”
“Because I want to know it before we have sex.”
Well, damn. She picked the one comment guaranteed to smash his guard to pieces. “Is that going to happen tonight?”
“We’re going to go upstairs and get naked. What happens after that is up to you, but I’m hoping you’ll pick the choice that involves condoms.” She finally rested her palms against his chest. “You do have some, right?”
“Bought them today.” Because he wasn’t a complete dumbass.
“Nice.”
He didn’t want to be an asshole either. He put his hand over hers. Caressed the back of her hand as he said the words that almost killed him to spit out. “You’ve been through a lot tonight and you don’t have to—”
“I know what I want and what I need.” Her hand moved under his until her thumb brushed his fingers. “The answer to both questions is you.”
That was it, then. No other woman he saw in the time since Shauna even knew to question the name he gave them, that being Brian Jacobs. Emery did and never wavered. She made it clear she wanted to know the real thing. An idea that scared the hell out of him, but she hadn’t balked or panicked no matter what bit of truth he dropped on her.
“Levi Wren Upton.” He hadn’t said it all together like that in years. Hell, he never even used Levi these days. The three together were so disconnected from who he was now and how he led his life. When he held a memorial service and said his final goodbye to his mother he buried Levi Upton, too.
She smiled. “So, just the last name is different.”
Warmth radiated off her. The comfort of touching her and soft acceptance in her voice made the admission easier. He never planned to say the name again. One more thing that changed since meeting her.
“I didn’t want any part of my father to linger. The judge understood why I didn’t want to share a name with my mother’s killer.” He blew out an uneasy breath. “I left Michigan and very quickly became someone else.”
“I’m not sure changing your name is the same as changing who you are.” She pressed a finger against his chest, right above his heart. “In here.”
To him they were. The anger stayed, festered. He funneled it all into his business. Into growing it, making it thrive. Becoming successful in a way that wiped out all the insecurities and fears Levi Upton had. Eventually he found stability, the kind that only came with time and the false veneer of moving on. “Wren originally came from my mom because her mother had an aviary in Japan. Wrens were her favorite, so it seemed right to keep it.”
“One of the few connections to your past.” Before he could ask what that meant, Emery spoke again. “What did Shauna think?”
“That I’d likely end up in jail for murder.” When they weren’t fighting about money, they fought about that topic.