****
Jess and I hadn’t had sex in over a month and I wasn’t really bothered by it. With the problems we’d been having and all the arguing, I wasn’t in the mood. I would just put on some porn and take care of myself. I thought maybe having sex with her now would make me feel something or feel different, but it didn’t and it didn’t help that I had a problem staying hard. Shit. I never had that problem before and it bothered me.
“Don’t be upset over it, Drew.” She softly stroked my chest. “I know you’ve been under a lot of stress lately with the company and I’ve done my fair share in contributing to that stress.”
I wanted to tell her that I didn’t think stress had anything to do with it and that she was more than likely the reason why. Actually, Jillian was the reason why. I couldn’t stop thinking about her and how it would feel to make love to her. The whole time I was fucking Jess, I was thinking about Jillian, and it needed to stop. I would never have a chance with her anyway. Not only had she just dumped her fiancé yesterday, she was starting over and embarking on a self-discovery journey to find herself.
“I’m not upset and you’re right, I’ve been under a lot of stress lately,” I lied.
“Well, we’re just going to have to destress you, and the first thing I’m going to do to prove to you that I’ve changed is I’m going to invite that girl, what’s her name?”
“What girl?”
“The one who left her fiancé at the altar?”
“Jillian?”
“Yes, I’m going to invite Jillian to have dinner with us before we leave.”
Shit. That was not a good idea.
“You don’t have to do that, Jess. This vacation is for the two of us.”
“Don’t be silly. I want to. She seems like a nice girl and she’s here alone. I kind of feel sorry for her. I’m sure she’s torn up by what she did and she could use some company.”
****
Jillian
I rented a car and drove to Ano’s house. I smiled as I pulled up and saw his family sitting on the front porch. His wife, three kids, aunt, sister, and brother in-law. They were a tight-knit family and they all lived in the same house. Stepping out of the car, I walked up to the porch, and his wife, Lonnie, got up from her chair and hugged me.
“You’re back.” She smiled. “Look at you. It’s been what? Two years since you were here last.”
“Yeah.” I hugged her tightly.
“I’ll go get Ano. He’ll be so surprised.”
As she went inside to get her husband, I said hello to all his family members. When Ano opened the creaky storm door, he stopped when he saw me.
“Jillian.” He held out his arms.
“Hi, Ano.”
“It’s good to see you again, girl. What’s been going on in that humdrum life of yours?”
I took in a deep breath. “I was supposed to get married yesterday.”
Ano looked at me and cocked his head. “And you bailed, didn’t you?”
“Yep. I sure did.”
“Good for you. You know I never liked that little weasel. Come inside and I’ll make us some herbal tea.”
“I’ll make it, dear,” Lonnie spoke. “The two of you go sit down and talk.”
He led me out the patio door, and we took seats in the lounge chairs that faced the water.
“So, you finally decided it was time to go find yourself.”
“Yeah. Pretty much. I just walked away from the only life I’d ever known.”
“How does it feel?”
“It feels great, but also a little scary.”
“Are you questioning yourself for leaving?”
“No. I’ve never been so sure of anything in my life.”
“Good. It’ll make your journey a little easier. But I will warn you, Jillian, in order to continue on with your journey, you need to become fearless of what you may discover and how your life will change.”
“I know. I understand that.” I looked down.
“What you find out about yourself will be with you forever and there will be no escaping it.”
“Here you are,” Lonnie spoke as she handed us our tea.
“Thank you, Lonnie.” I smiled.
“Thank you, my love.” Ano took hold of his wife’s hand and kissed it.
They had the kind of relationship that I’d always dreamed of. Every time I visited them growing up, their bond seemed stronger. They had the kind of love that was rare. Unlike my parents, who were at each other’s throats 24/7.
“You two are really something special.” I smiled at Ano.
He reached over and placed his hand on mine. “You, my friend, will have a love like ours someday.”
“I hope so.” A small smile crossed my lips.
“You will. You’re a beautiful woman with a beautiful soul. I want you to remember one thing.”
“What’s that?”
“Your journey won’t be complete until you make peace with those who love you.”