Every sinew in her aching, exhausted body told her to give up but she hauled herself to her feet. A wave of dizziness washed over her and a muted pain awoke in her right shoulder. She peered under her tunic that was stained maroon with her blood. Bacchus had nearly cleaved her arm off. She vaguely remembered healing herself as they battled, repairing the worst of the damage. She vaguely remembered the battle. Only flashes of fear and the weight of his blade against hers. Healing herself now would restore her memory, make her sharper, as well as make whole her arm, but she wondered if she had the strength for it after all she had endured. The cost of such healing comes after the battle, she remembered from her training on Isle Saliz.
It might kill me. Or put me to sleep. She recalled how tired she had been trying to talk to Julian. Julian! Where is he? Gods, let him live. Then she remembered, like the battle, in bits and pieces. He is not Julian. He is someone else. Someone terrible. Sebastian Vaas. They sing songs about his deeds… They sing songs…
Selena called for the healing power and wasn’t surprised to find she could only muster enough to keep the pain in her shoulder from waking completely.
It’s because I’m already so spent that I can’t muster more. Me. Not the Two-Faced God. The power comes from me.
The beast she called truth was awake now, its eyes wide open.
We are alone.
She shook her head. “No,” she whispered through clenched teeth.
There was more. So much more she didn’t understand. So much more to learn…if she had the will to. The bitter thoughts kept her company as she trudged along the shore, not entirely sure where she was going. Ilior was nowhere to be seen. The waters churned and crashed on the beach, soaking her boots. The rain was a curtain. She hugged herself, cradling her injured arm, and shivering. The shivering made it ache but the ache was the only thing keeping her lucid.
She heard someone calling her name. Or it might have been the wind. But no, a figure was racing up the beach toward her. She thought to weave light but she was too weak. If the person was an enemy, she was dead. But it was Niven. Rainwater plastered his light hair down around his face and his eyes were wide with elation that she was alive, but he was desperate too. He shouted something at her; she saw his mouth move. She shivered as he pulled her down the beach, stumbling along until the word Ilior made itself distinct from the rest of Niven’s urgings. Then she found the strength to run.
The dawn had come but the storm howled like a night creature. Selena saw huddled shapes in the sand, gathered around another, larger shape. Cat was there, but she had black hair now. Ori sat beside her and Cat had her face buried against the Haru woman’s chest. Ori’s shirt was red with blood.
Sebastian was sitting off to the side, his head slumped down. He looked up as she approached and hope flared across his wan features. He was hurt; his face was ashen and bloody but he smiled at her. Faintly. Happiness that she was alive. She could see he wanted to go to her but he dared not. He was a stranger. And then Niven was showing her…
Ilior.
He was dying. Selena was as sure of this as she was of her own name. He writhed with illness, muscles twitching and drawing tight. His face was a grimace of agony. Selena fell to her knees beside him. The rain was relentless.
“Heal me,” she commanded Niven. “I need strength.”
“Your wound?” Niven asked tremulously.
Selena forced the words out between clenched teeth. “It remains.”
Sebastian’s face contorted with pain before he turned away.
Niven did as he was told and Selena felt the strange delirium of exhaustion and fear recede along with the pain in her shoulder. Her mind grew sharper as Niven tended her, and a new fear seized her as she regarded her friend.
It’s so very bad.
She shrugged off Niven’s touch and channeled her own healing into Ilior. It did nothing. Too late. She kept some for herself, grew more powerful, and tried again. Nothing. He had been in the darkpool and the darkpool’s poison knew no remedy.
Ilior opened his filmy eyes. He smiled when they found her.
“Selena…”
Her heart broke into pieces at the warmth in his rough voice that cradled her name so softly.
“Hear me,” he said. “Garand’ash means Guardian. That is you.” He swallowed with difficulty. “Kori’bi means protector. That is me.”
Selena nodded. She didn’t know what he meant but that he was making amends. For the rift that had sprung up between them. It all seemed so foolish now; she wanted to scream for the lost moments in which she doubted him.
For all the he has done for me…
“Vai’Ensai means ‘the siblings,’” he said. “Just like you thought.”
She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. I’m so sorry, Ilior. So sorry.”
Every part of her was cold and growing colder as she watched the light in Ilior’s eyes dim. He unclenched his fist and an iron pendant on a chain slipped out on the sand. She had never seen it before. Not in ten years but she suspected he carried it with him always. She regarded it with no surprise and let it lie where it fell.
“It bears your name,” Ilior said. “The stone and fire…it sent me to you. It gave you to me.”
Another scream welled up in her throat. A wail of anguish. A desire to kill someone or something and make it feel the pain so that hers was less. Instead she only nodded again.
“You must… never go to the Cloud Isles,” Ilior said. “It is too dangerous…No matter what …anyone tells you. Stay away. Please. That is all I know, I swear it. That is my first oath. Do not…let me forsake…it.”
“I promise,” Selena whispered. She held his hand tightly, so tightly, as if she could keep him in his body. “Please, Ilior. Stay. I can’t survive this without you.”
“You can. You are strong. You are…so beautiful.” With effort, he laid his scaled hand to her cheek and she held it there for him. “I love you. That was my mistake. That was not part of my duty but it’s true anyway.” He smiled. “It’s true.”
“Ilior, please,” she whispered. “You are my other half. Please…Stay…”
He tried to speak but could not. He only smiled at her words. His hand fell from her cheek and slumped into the sand beside the pendant. He did not stay.
For long moments, Selena heard only the whistle of her breath, in and out. She was finally numb. She couldn’t even shiver, but knelt in the sand beside Ilior, staring at nothing, at the sand. At a tuft of grass.
A hand touched her arm. She looked around. Niven. Tears streamed from his eyes as he pressed the iron pendant into her hand. She stared dumbly down at it, and then at Ilior again.
Ten years…
She cut off the thought before it could undo her.
Beneath her was the sand of Calinda. The water pounded the shore behind her and the water was filled with the dead. Some washed up on the beach, driven by the storm. Dead. Like Ilior. Like Accora. Like the Bazira they had killed this night. Like the Zak’reth who had fought for her this night and the Zak’reth she had killed a decade ago. The villagers were here too. Bacchus had turned their grave into his temple and they were restless. This place, Calinda, was the end.
Yes, an end…
Selena rose to her feet and looked around at her companions. Tired, wounded, scared. They looked at her for what to do next. Sebastian had risen to his feet but he looked as though a strong wind would topple him down. He looked at her, his face no longer expressionless but alive with fear for her and a desperate need for her mercy.