The meeting was called to order and Violet began scribbling away. I wasn’t interested in the pedestrian agenda that included the proposition of renting space next door for additional conference rooms and the number of places we had for pupils—trainee barristers—for the coming year. It was just an excuse for certain members of chambers to hear more of their own voice as far as I was concerned. But Violet was recording everything as if she were reporting for Parliament’s official record.
Two of the most senior members of chambers began to trade opinions about a current pupil and whether he should be offered tenancy—a permanent place in chambers. They were diametrically opposed, one thinking he should take a spot, the other believing he wasn’t good enough. I didn’t have a view. I hadn’t worked with him. I hated working with people generally, but particularly those who hadn’t already proven themselves. My reputation was too important, and I was too much of a control freak.
Except, there was nothing freaky about wanting to be in control—it was a natural survival instinct. One that had served me well. Voices became raised and Violet turned to me, her eyes widening as if she were sharing her shock with me. It was the first time she’d acknowledged me, and I was puzzled at how much I enjoyed the intimacy of her looking to me for answers. As if we had some kind of connection or history.
What the fuck was happening to me?
This girl had cast a spell on me.
The room was uncomfortably hot and my clothes unusually tight. Trying to give myself room to breathe, I ran my index finger around the inside of my collar. It seemed to do the opposite, and I found myself gasping for air as if I’d become allergic to this meeting, or worse, overwhelmed by the possibility that a woman was getting to me.
I stood abruptly and left, not bothering to excuse myself. I needed to create some distance between Violet and me. I’d never been unsettled by a woman before. Even my wife had found it difficult to get my attention, which I guess was part of the reason I’d spent the last three years living in a hotel.
It wasn’t as if Violet King was so special, despite her perfume of the Indian twilight and her legs that looked like they were the perfect length to wrap around my waist. No matter the delicate curve of her neck and the press of her hands.
No. Violet wasn’t special and I was done thinking about her.
Nine
Violet
Despite knowing it would make her English ass uncomfortable, I hugged Darcy as hard as I could. It was Friday. I’d been paid. I was ready to flirt with some British boys and drink some London cocktails. Luckily, Darcy had saved me from an evening in front of the TV with a pizza. I was excited to have my first real night out since I’d arrived in London.
“Put me down, Violet,” she said. “Anyone would think you’d just been released from prison.”
I laughed and sat down on the low velvet chair in an uber-cool bar in the center of Soho. “Some would say I have.”
“How is the job?”
Darcy lived in a world where it was possible to survive without working—not that she didn’t work. She did. The responsibilities of running her family’s estate swallowed up her life. She just didn’t have to work. I wasn’t sure what that would feel like.
“Good. I’m a ‘proper’ commuting Londoner,” I said, waving at a waiter to get his attention.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t find you something more exciting.”
“Are you kidding? It was so great of you. And actually, I’m enjoying it. It’s distracting.” I hadn’t thought about David and the IPO since I’d started.
“Aren’t they a bunch of snooty arseholes who were born with a silver spoon in their mouths?” she asked.
I raised my eyebrows at her. “Seriously? This coming from the granddaughter and sister of freaking dukes?”
She laughed. “I suppose when you put it like that . . . It’s just that barristers are an odd bunch. They seem to exist in a different world. I dated one once.”
She’d caught my attention. Were they impossible to date? Knightley worked so much, I wasn’t sure he’d have the time for anything other than sleep. “I didn’t know that. What happened?”
“He was emotionally stunted, obviously.”
I nodded. That sounded about right. And a mass of contradictions. Formal and polite in some circumstances, not so much when he was looking at me as if he wanted to devour me. But smart as anything and complicated as anything. And I really liked that.
The waiter delivered our cocktails—my favorite: a French 75.
“And he was a total workaholic.”
Hmmm, that sounded familiar. It was a wonder any of them managed to get laid. As much as he was a workaholic, I bet Knightley made time for sex. Although I couldn’t imagine he prioritized a relationship. People didn’t seem to be his focus. He was all about the paper.
“And the sex just wasn’t that good. He had a premature thing happening. Came from kissing me one time,” Darcy continued.
I shuddered. “Oh wow.” Knightley seemed too much in control to have that issue. “Doesn’t sound particularly fulfilling.”
She laughed. “No. Not in any way. But I guess you don’t have to fuck them.”
I kept my face passive, careful not to give anything away. Darcy didn’t need to know I wanted to get naked with Knightley. Since our encounter in his office, I’d avoided him as much as I could. Then, in the meeting yesterday, he’d sat next to me despite seats available at the table. Maybe he’d wanted to reassure me that I shouldn’t feel uncomfortable, but then I might be overestimating his softer side.
In any case, he’d left the meeting in a bit of a rush and I’d found myself missing the warmth of his body next to mine. He’d sat closer to me than he’d needed to, and I’d enjoyed it, reveling in the buzz between us. At least I’d thought there’d been a buzz between us. Maybe I’d imagined it.
“Violet?”
“Sorry,” I said, realizing Darcy had been talking while I daydreamed. “I just remembered I forgot to finish something off at work.”
“So you’re enjoying it?” she asked.
I nodded. “I’ve never had an office job before. At the start-up we were working from our apartments or coffee shops and after that I’ve always waitressed or worked in hospitality. But yes, it’s better than I expected.” For so long I’d rejected any job that involved a computer; I’d not wanted any association with my past disappointment.
When Darcy didn’t respond, I glanced up from my drink.
She grinned at me. “You never know, this could lead to something.”
“It’s a nice thought, but I doubt it.” Clerical work would do for now. But I didn’t emotionally invest in anything for the long term. It wasn’t who I was. Not now. At least, I didn’t think it was. Swapping New York for London had been the biggest change I’d made in my life since David and I split after college, and it had awoken something in me. I craved something more; I just wasn’t sure what. “Enough about work. I want to hear about your dating life.”