I don’t look back when I walk away this time. I can’t see the heartache on his face again. I’ll splinter open. It’s better this way. I don’t want to lead him on. The man who holds my heart needs me now.
I step into the bathroom and close the door behind me. Luke is climbing into a tub of water. I’ve never seen him completely naked before. Even bloody and battered, he’s gorgeous. I try the best I can not to focus on his firm ass, or between his legs, when he sinks into the water. It’s like my eyes are drawn right to it, though. I need to get my mind out of the gutter and focus on the task at hand. Not a certain other task I’d like to undertake, and not my hand or mouth performing said task.
I push everything aside in my mind and kneel next to the bathtub, facing him. I find a clean washcloth under the sink and lather it up with a bar of soap. His eyes are closed. His arms are lying on either side of the tub, and his head is resting against the back. I start to wash his neck when his head lifts to watch me. Slowly, I clean his face next, cupping water in my hands to rinse him off, being mindful of his stitches, trying not to get them wet which is proving difficult. I make my way over both arms before cleaning around his wound. Now it’s becoming impossible to clean him off and keep the wound dry.
“Why didn’t they clean you better when they stitched you up? And why didn’t they put a bandage over the stitches?” I ask.
His eyes bore into mine with an intensity I haven’t seen yet. “I didn’t want another woman touching me, only you. I didn’t want you to think I cared for her and that’s why I let her touch me.”
“She’s there to help you, Luke. She needs to touch you to fix you up. If I was there I would have embraced her for doing her best to mend you.”
“And she did what she needed, no more. The stitches were done and I left. I wanted to find you and make sure you were okay. My men wouldn’t let me come here first. I tried, but I was quickly overpowered in my weakened state.”
“You needed to get that wound closed. I’m glad you got it taken care of. I just wish someone would have told me you were all right.”
He chuckles, surprising me. “This,” he says, sweeping his arm over his chest, “is nothing. I’ve been hurt much worse.” He lifts his left leg from the water, droplets splashing down, and points to a long scar on the side of his muscular left thigh. I trace it with my finger.
“What happened?”
“The last war was rough on us. A lot were injured, some killed. Someone got the jump on me with their sword and, well, you see the result. It was much deeper than the one on my chest. Walking was not fun for a while. Luckily, it happened at the tail end of the battle, so I didn’t miss much of the fight.”
“I can imagine you fighting through the pain and continuing on until you fall over.”
His lips quirk up on one side. “That’s exactly what happened. Elliott had to pull me away from the heat of it and throw me on Tali to get me home. I barely remember the days after. I lost a lot of blood. Elliott said poor Tali looked like she was the one who was stabbed.”
I shake my head. “I’m glad I wasn’t here to see it. This is bad enough. I was so scared, Luke. I thought…I thought I wasn’t going to see you again.” My bottom lip starts to tremble. He reaches up, placing his hand on the back of my neck and pulls me close until our foreheads touch.
“It’s going to take a lot more than this to take me away from you. The only way I won’t return to your side after a battle is if I’m dead. Hasn’t it sunken in yet that I’m yours?”
Placing a gentle kiss on his lips, I pull back and offer a small smile. “It’s starting to.”
“Finally,” he groans. “Your neck. Are you okay?” His fingers trail along the edge of my bandage.
“I’m fine. I didn’t need stiches or anything.”
“I hate that I couldn’t protect you better.”
“You did just fine.”
I finish cleaning him off and help him get out of the tub, careful to keep my eyes above waist level. Sure, I want to see all of him again now that he’s standing up, but I need to behave. He’s hurt, exhausted, and in pain. While he won’t admit it, I see his mouth pinch tight when he moves.
Finding him shorts, I bring them into the bathroom, and quickly shower while he gets ready for bed. Elliott and Oliver must have left. The house is completely quiet. We both settle into the cool sheets after I draw the damask closed around us, tucking us into our own little cocoon.
He tries to pull me close, but groans in pain, so I gently nudge him onto his back and lay beside him. My leg rests atop his and my fingers settle on his bicep. I don’t want to hurt him further.
“Closer,” he murmurs groggily.
I scoot as close as possible to his side. “There.”
“Not good enough.”
“You’re hurt and tired. This is as close as I get.”
“I hurt more without your body against mine. Now move closer.”
I prop myself up on my elbow and try to figure out how to get closer to him without touching his chest. I settle on moving down and placing my head on his stomach while my arm drapes across his hips.
“Not what I had in mind, but much better.”
I gently tap his stomach with my hand. “Behave.”
He laughs, but then tenses beneath me. The pain must be bad. I tried to get him to take some medicine the healer gave him, although he refused it. I wish he wouldn’t be so stubborn. He’d feel better and probably be able to sleep easier.
His body starts to relax beneath me. I take in his warmth and close my eyes. I still don’t know how someone I’ve only known a couple of weeks has gotten under my skin so fast. The fact that I could have lost him today was enough to scare me into thinking of a life without him.
When things started going downhill with my ex, prior to me catching him cheating, my mother confessed she never thought the two of us made sense. I asked her why she never voiced it previously. She asked if I would have listened to her before my wedding day and not gone through with it. I told her no, of course not, and that I loved him regardless of what she had to say I would have married him. Right then I had my answer as to why she never told me.
So, here I lay on a bed, in a house in a faraway land, where dragons fly through the sky, and there is a field of azure flowers. Maybe Luke had a point when he said everything happened the way it did for a reason. If I had dreamt about him earlier in life, would I be where I am right now? Would I have crossed through the portal that day, and if so, would I have given the key to his father so he could go after his mother?