“What research?”
Aidan pauses before answering. Maybe he’s worried the people on the plane around us might overhear and think he’s nuts. Maybe they’ll call Child Protective Services and send me back to Mom and Ridgemont before we’ve even begun, but then I remember what happened in the hospital parking lot and the look on Nolan’s face when I didn’t kiss him. I’m not entirely sure I want to go back. Not yet anyway.
“The mission of luiseach is to maintain a balance between humans and spirits, between the light spirits and the dark. It has been our sacred duty for hundreds, thousands of years, since the very dawn of humanity.” He speaks as though he’s reciting words he’s said many times before.
“Is this your tried-and-true mentoring speech?” I attempt a joke, but Aidan doesn’t seem to get it. Or, at least, he doesn’t crack a smile. “I mean, every time you have a new luiseach to train, do you say the same thing?” I try to laugh, but it’s no use. Jokes aren’t funny when you have to explain them.
I’m not sure Aidan even knows what a joke is.
We may have the same eyes, but that’s where our physical similarities end. He’s tall, so tall that his knees touch the seat in front of them, even in first class. I’ve got plenty of leg room; if only he could borrow some of mine. His hair is so dark it’s almost black, and his skin is paler than mine, without a single freckle marring it. He’s kind of perfect looking, like a statue or Clark Kent or something. I bet he’s never tripped. I bet he ties his shoelaces so tight that they never come undone.
Solemnly he explains, “As long as there have been humans living and dying on the Earth, there have been luiseach, guarding humanity and keeping the dark spirits from possessing them, forcing spirits to move on or destroying them altogether.”
Thanks to Nolan’s research, I already know this. Grr . . . just thinking about Nolan makes my stomach hurt. But it’s impossible not to think of him because almost everything I understand about being a luiseach is thanks to him. “But because no luiseach has been born since me, the balance has been disrupted, right?”
He nods. “This is an unprecedented time in luiseach history.”
Score one for Sunshine. I go through my mental list and land on another question.
“Your work—the work you and Victoria were doing—it was to restore the balance?”
Again Aidan nods. “In a way, yes. Part of my research is to find a solution to the growing darkness. The imbalance.” Another question, another answer, even if he’s not exactly chatty about it.
“Nolan said luiseach birth rates were dropping even before I was born. Do you know why?”
“It takes two luiseach parents to make a luiseach child.”
“I know,” I respond, and Aidan looks surprised.
“Nolan,” I explain with a shrug, raising my eyebrow, even though saying his name out loud makes my stomach hurt even worse than thinking it.
“Our gene pool was shrinking. There are only so many luiseach, and the human race grows more numerous every year.”
I remember something Victoria said. She and Aidan had a falling out after she married a human and had a child. Was Aidan angry because she’d given up the chance to have a luiseach baby and instead had a human child, Anna—a child who could be killed by a demon? Maybe there were more luiseach like her, ones who couldn’t help falling in love with a human, luiseach who cared more about having a family than about producing children with powers.
The question I want to ask next—the question I’ve wanted to ask since Aidan first showed up on my doorstep—sits like a stone in the back of my throat: Why did you abandon me? It’s like the words are trapped in there, stuck between my vocal chords, unable to get out.
So I ask something else instead. “Why do I feel so warm around Nolan?”
“He’s your protector,” Aidan explains. “When he’s near, the spirits that might touch you settle down a bit so your temperature doesn’t dip so low.”
Before I can stop myself, I ask, “But then why can’t I touch him? I mean, I can touch him, but it makes me feel . . .” I bite my lip. I specifically didn’t want to ask Aidan this particular question. It’s way too private, but it’s also too late, because the words just flew out of my mouth before I could stop them.
Aidan doesn’t answer right away, and I’m surprised to see that he looks flustered. He’s actually tugging at his collar, and for a second I think he’s going to loosen his tie. Maybe Aidan isn’t so different from normal fathers, uncomfortable with the idea of his teenage daughter dating someone. Ashley told me her dad could barely look at her for days after he came home early from work one night and saw her making out with her boyfriend Cory Cooper in their driveway.
Not that Aidan is my father the way Ashley’s father is hers. He’s my mentor/father, and I’ve only known him for a few days. He’s not even human.