She snapped her teeth, put between them, “If ever you wish to know—even if only to understand me—you have but to ask.” She rolled away, and when he returned to his side of the bed realized she had given him her back, which she could not stand to give any man so near her. She started to correct the error but talked herself down. Though she did not want to expose her back to Lothaire, it was not for fear of having too little time and space in which to defend herself. It was because she could not stop loving him and even now, despite her anger, wanted to put her head on his shoulder and curl against him.
Over the next hour, she knew he lay awake the same as she, and when she could pray no more and began to drift into the night, she told herself she was glad he had not let her speak. Had she revealed she had not willingly given herself to Simon, and had he not believed her anymore than that Michael was not Clarice’s father, the progress made toward a passably good marriage might have been impeded, might even have ended were he so reviled by what he thought fantastic lies he determined she would but serve as a womb for breeding and a servant for ensuring the functioning of his household.
Aye, for the best.
Chapter 27
A lake—not a pond, just as the young Lothaire had assured her during his third visit to Owen when she had asked if there was a pond near enough High Castle and sufficiently private that when they wed they could swim and bathe together.
He had said there was no such pond nearby, and when her smile fell told her there was a lake, and they would, indeed, swim and bathe there. Just the two of them, mayhap at sunset. Then he had been bolder yet and said he would kiss her there and afterward they would lie on the shore and watch the stars come out and count them until there were too many to number.
God willing, that might yet happen. But first Laura must surrender the hurt of two nights past. And Lothaire would have to release what he held close.
As she reined in and waited for her husband’s long stride to close the distance between her and the final shearing for which she had been told to expect two score workers and three score of their family, she wondered if when they returned to High Castle following the supper and they passed the lake half a league distant from the gathering Lothaire would remember his promise to take her there. She believed he would, though she did not expect he would say anything. But in time…
He was dirty and spotted with wool, having spent the early part of the day shearing the last of the flock, but it was obvious he had brushed himself off as best he could when the wagons bearing Cook’s feast and its escort appeared over the rise.
Laura did not mind his disarray, especially when he smiled at her, regardless if it was more for her benefit or those accompanying the wagons—half a dozen servants, as many knights, ten men-at-arms, Sir Angus, and Tina. There were two others as well, both unexpected—Sebille who said she never missed the shearing supper when Laura could not hide her surprise, and the physician who was to have remained with Lady Raisa but been summoned to tend one of the workers who had broken an arm.
When the rider appeared shortly before the departure from High Castle, Sebille had arranged for a woman servant to sit with her mother and a man-at-arms to keep watch outside her door.
“Your patient rests in the shade of the trees, Martin,” Lothaire called as the physician aided Sebille in dismounting—Sebille whose gaze was on Sir Angus who had lifted Tina down.
“I am glad you came, my lady,” Lothaire said, halting alongside Laura’s mount.
“Is not my place at your side on such an occasion?”
“It is.” He raised his arms and it felt wonderful to go into them, especially as there had been little physical contact these past days beyond the brushing of arms and hands.
As if he also missed the contact, his hands lingered at her waist when her feet were firm upon the ground. “You are lovely,” he said.
She looked down the gown fashioned of rich brown samite that had been far from simple ere she removed its embellishments save the gold braid around neck and hem. “I thank you.”
“I wish I could pay the same compliment to Clarice.” He slid his hands down Laura’s waist and off her hips, and she felt the intention.
Returning her gaze to his, she saw a glimmer in his eyes she had not seen for two days. He truly was pleased by her arrival. “She is a mess?”
“Methinks you will be shocked, and I fear her gown may have seen its last wear—not only fouled but torn.”
“Torn?”
“At waist and hem. She was determined to put shears to one of the lambs though I forbade it since she has neither the experience nor strength to control even a smaller animal without aid.”
Though Laura tried not to be alarmed, she had to ask, “She is not the one who requires the physician, is she?”
“She is not. Only her pride and gown were harmed when she lost the battle and found herself in a mud puddle. Too, she disagreed with her punishment.”
“Which was?”
“Sacking the wool, which she much dislikes. But she once more assists the shearers.”
“I am sorry she was difficult.”
“I am not. She learned more than she would have had she behaved. Now she knows exactly why she must obey me, though she will surely test me again.”
“She admires you,” Laura said, “and I cannot thank you enough.”
He inclined his head. “She told me she worked well for you on the day past.”
“She did, though methinks she did it more for you than me.”
“Nay, the sheep. I did not expect it, but I am not so certain the excitement of what is new to her will grow old. It is quite possible my new daughter has wool in her blood.”
As would have been more expected had she Soames in her blood, Laura thought. “I am glad she is happy here, especially after—” Laura stopped herself from spilling the name of Castle Soaring for which her daughter had expressed a preference. Even if it had not led to her speaking the name Lothaire did not wish to hear, it would have put the man between them. In the next instant, his smile faltered, and she realized Michael was there regardless.
She looked past him to the simple structure whose roof was long and wide and walls few. On either side were pens, the one on the left holding a dozen unshorn sheep, the one on the right nearly bursting its posts and rails to contain what must number two hundred barely clothed sheep. And all in between was where the shearing was done out of the day’s heat, and which appeared even more the birthplace of snow than it had when first she laid eyes on it.
“While the tables are erected and the food set out,” she said, “will you show me the work of wool, Husband?”
“Providing you do not mind picking the fluff from your gown and hair,” he said.
“I will not, though I may require your aid where I cannot reach.”
She had not meant that to be suggestive, but she was glad it sounded that way when his smile recovered. “I shall be happy to help however I can, Wife.”
And then they would consummate their marriage? Feeling her face warm, she said, “Show me how the Lord of Lexeter saves his lands.”
“With much sweat, lack of sleep, and the aid of a sizable tax break, of course.”
As he took her arm and drew her toward the shelter, Laura said, “Now I have seen how hard you labor, methinks you would have saved your lands had you gained naught in wedding me.”