Sweet Nothing: Novel

“You want pity now? Is that it? Man the fuck up. Whether you see it or not, you have a life most have only dreamed of.”


He scoffed, shaking his head. I knew guys like him didn’t expect to struggle, but no matter where we came from, life was cruel. I knew that firsthand. Bad things happened to good people, and sometimes, God liked to shine his magnifying glass down on the biggest ant just to watch it squirm.

“Sometimes it’s hard to see the silver lining,” he said.

“You have a wife, children, a home, and a six-figure salary. What more could you possibly want?” I tried to keep from raising my voice. His jaw tightened, and I widened my shoulders at the silent exchange between us. “Avery is off the table.”

He smirked. “Is that a threat, Josh?”

“No. You won’t be a very good doctor if you have two broken hands.” I slapped the book against his chest. “That’s a threat.” I held his gaze for a moment longer before hurrying down his sidewalk and into my car. I needed to see Avery or I was going to lose my mind.





Just as I stepped out onto the sidewalk, a golden leaf drifted from the maple tree that stood in front of my building, and rested on my sneaker. I pulled my scrub jacket tighter around me, looking for Josh’s car. He’d just dropped me off from work, and then said he’d be right back, but he’d been gone for half an hour, and the sun was beginning to set.

Glowing Jack-O-Lanterns flickered on our stoop, and plastic ghosts hung from the trees lining our street. Night clouds were beginning to build in the west, making the breeze feel colder. Halloween was approaching, one of my favorite seasons, but fall felt wrong this year. I couldn’t quite put my finger on it, but even with the chill in the air and the spooky decorations, I felt time slipping away from me.

An older car slowed to a stop in front of me and honked. The lime green practically glowed against the thick black stripe down the side. The car looked angry, and strong, and bright enough that no one would accidentally run into me again.

Josh killed the motor and then jumped out, grinning from ear to ear. “She runs!” he said. He patted the black hood with the palm of his hand before jogging to where I stood on the sidewalk. He squeezed me to his side, staring at the beast of a car like a proud parent.

“It’s great,” I said.

He turned to me, his eyebrows pulling together. The adorable double lines between them made me a little giddy. We were at that phase where every little thing he did was magical, and for the most part, he could do no wrong, but now he was looking at me like I’d just eaten his last favorite cookie.

“Great? She’s yours, Avery. I’ve been working my ass off to get her ready for you.”

“Mine?” I said in disbelief.

“I do not appreciate your dubious tone,” he said, still frowning.

I reached up to smooth out the lines I loved. “You showed me an avocado-green beater. This is a shiny, um … what is it?”

“This, my adorably clueless lady, is a 1970 Dodge Challenger in Sublime Green. A nice step up from the baby-shit color of your last car that was left smeared on the highway, I may add. She just needs a name.”

“This is … this is too much.”

He placed his hands on my cheeks and kissed my forehead. “Sweetheart, for the bargain price of three ninety-nine and free labor your rather dashing, brilliant mechanic boyfriend gifted to you, this shiny Dodge fucking Challenger is yours.”

I turned toward the Challenger in disbelief. “Stop. This isn’t funny.”

“I told you that you’d have wheels by your birthday, didn’t I?”

“But … my birthday isn’t until next week,” I said, still lost in utter shock and awe. I’d been a little down about the approach of my mid-twenties, but Josh standing in front of me, giving me the best gift I’d ever been given, trumped the pang of turning twenty-five.

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