Fiona stood there watching me. Leaving might be the smartest thing for me to do. It would bring an end to this painful day. But I couldn’t do it. I needed Stone to talk to me. He had to help me understand. I needed a reason to believe he was good inside. I wanted to believe that so badly. I couldn’t believe he could be so heartless to his child. There had to be more.
Because of that I wouldn’t leave. Stone deserved a chance to correct this. It was possible Jasper didn’t know the facts.
When I began walking toward her, Fiona sighed with relief on her face.
“Thank God. I’m too tired for the drama that would have ensued had you walked out of this building.”
I paused. “What do you mean?”
Fiona closed the door and turned to walk around me. “Stone would have come barreling after you like a crazed man. I don’t know what’s going on with the two of you. But that man sounded more desperate than I’ve ever heard him. No, let me be clear. I have never heard him desperate. He doesn’t show emotion.”
That was the man I knew. The selfless things I had seen him do. They didn’t fit with the man who had a child and left him with an abusive father. I was missing a piece. I knew it. I had to be.
“Are you hungry?” she asked.
I doubted I would be eating again if anytime soon. My stomach couldn’t handle food in the state it was in.
I held back the ugly face I felt like making. “No, I’m fine.”
“Do you want to talk about it or be alone so you can cry and shit?”
“I think I need to be alone,” I told her honestly.
She tipped her chin at me. “Thought so. Come this way.”
I followed her across the living area, turning left to stop in front of a closed door. “That’s the room Shay uses. It’s far enough away from Chantel’s room she won’t hear you crying when she gets home and start asking nosey ass questions. I can appreciate you don’t want to talk about it. Relieved actually. But she loves drama.”
She opened the door and the room was smaller than the two I had seen in Stone’s apartment. I wondered if this was what Presley’s room had looked like.
“Thank you for this.” I sighed as I walked inside.
“No worries. Make yourself at home. This place is laid out similar to Stone’s so you can find the kitchen if you do get hungry.”
I smiled my acknowledgment, and Fiona closed the door without saying anything else. I waited a moment then let my legs give out as I sank to the floor and wrapped my arms around my legs. Rocking back and forth I cried. It didn’t ease the ache. Nothing but Stone could do that. The simple fact he had been worried about me only made the tears come harder.
I couldn’t stop loving him. Even if he was damaged from his childhood. Even if he wasn’t capable of truly loving someone. I didn’t see how he could love me if he couldn’t love his son. There was a disconnect that I feared would always be there.
Beulah
LOUD MUSIC WOKE ME UP.
When I opened my eyes, the cream-colored fluffy rug was under my cheek. I’d fallen asleep on the floor last night. Stretching, my body felt stiff and abused. Not from the hardwood floor—I’d slept on worse. My aches and pains were from the drain all my crying had caused.
Sitting up, I winced from a sharp pain in my left hip. Maybe the hard floor got a few slugs into me after all.
I sat up in the dark room and felt a blanket pooled in my lap. Someone had covered me up and turned off the lights last night.
Looking up at the ceiling, I wondered if he was home. What he was doing today? When we would talk?
The floor vibrated with noise coming from the other room along with what felt like someone jumping.
I stood up and ran my hand over my hair. Picking up the blanket, I folded it and left it on the edge of the bed.
I couldn’t stay at Fiona’s forever, hiding from Stone. And he couldn’t ignore me forever. He had to speak to me sooner or later because I needed answers. And I felt lost without him.
Someone yelled, drawing my attention to the noise in the living room. I decided to poke my head out to see what was happening out there. I also needed to thank Fiona for letting me stay, then I planned to head upstairs because I had to get ready. Geraldine would be expecting me. A flutter of hope came at the thought of her. Geraldine would know the truth.
I opened the door and followed the sound around the corner. In the living area, I found a blonde built exactly like Fiona. She had her hair in a ponytail on top of her head. She was wearing a sports bra and a pair of tiny spandex shorts as she danced in front of what appeared to be a video game on the large screen television.
“Turn it down! I swear to God I am going to throw that shit out!” Fiona’s furious voice could be heard loud and clear over the music.
The blonde didn’t even acknowledge her. She kept on dancing. Apparently, I had slept through her dance off for some time because she was sweating and her cheeks were flushed. She glanced over at me and smiled, and went right back to playing the game.
“Why can’t you run like normal people?” Fiona continued shouting as she walked into the room scowling. She looked past the dancing female at me. “Sorry about this.” She waved her hand at the blonde. “She’s a fucking fruitcake!”
I walked closer to Fiona so I could thank her and leave, but as I reached her, the blonde cut off the game.
“Done! Now stop bitching. That’s more fun than running. Running is boring as hell,” the girl said then wiped her sweaty forehead with a towel.
“Running doesn’t wake up the fucking building at six in the morning,” Fiona shot back.
The girl shrugged. “I have no time the rest of the day.” She reminded me of Barbie. When she turned her attention to me she smiled. “It’s nice to meet you Beulah. I’m Chantel. Sorry if I woke you.”
“You woke up Satan himself with that crap. Of course you woke her,” Fiona grumbled. She turned and gave me an apologetic smile. “Would you like coffee?”
“No, I need to get ready for work. But thank you for last night and letting me stay here. I really appreciate it.”
Fiona reached into her back pocket, pulled out a letter and handed it to me. “Stone dropped this off.”
I looked at the envelope and my hand trembled as I took it. He wasn’t upstairs. He’d left me a note. I felt sick again and I wanted to run from the letter. I didn’t want to open it knowing it would bring pain. Nothing good could come of this. I knew if I went back to the bedroom and curled up on the floor it wouldn’t make the letter cease to exist.
“When did he leave it with you?” I asked as my voice gave away my obvious fear.
“Early, about five.”
I nodded and stood there staring at the envelope. I had to open it, but doing that in front of two people I hardly knew made me feel even more vulnerable. Then again, opening it alone was terrifying. I needed Stone here. I had learned to depend on him. Even though he was causing my excruciating pain, I still wanted him to be there to help me deal with whatever the truth was.
“You can read it in the kitchen,” Fiona said softly.