“Here come Stan and Bunny,” Vic said, striding to meet the couple as they approached. The men slapped each other on the back and jabbed each other in the ribs for enough time that I heard Margot release an impatient sigh. The woman stood with a pleasant, fixed expression while the boys duked it out. Finally the three turned to our little huddle.
“Margot, lovely to see you again, just lovely,” the man said into Margot’s ear as they exchanged a sterile embrace. The woman shook Margot’s hand but kept stealing glances at Avery.
“Stan, Bunny,” Vic said, unveiling us like the new car behind Door Number Three, “I’d like to introduce you to the brilliant duo that has brought Thrill Me to life. Avery Michaels and Charlie Garrett. Folks, the morning hosts who need no introduction, Mr. Stan Traynor and Ms. Bunny Lancaster.”
We shook hands in turn, Stan murmuring niceties while flashing a mouth full of teeth that looked a size too big for his face.
“Great to meet you all, splendid to meet you,” he said after air-kissing me near my earlobe. “Looking forward to the debut.”
Vic wiggled crossed his fingers in an exaggerated display of nerves. “This weekend! I can’t believe it’s already here.”
Bunny put her arm on Margot, who appeared to dislike having Bunny involved in her personal space. “Oh, you guys will be great. Just spectacular! Really!” She pointed to the clock. “But we’ll talk about that on camera, right, Stanners?”
With that, we were herded over to the set and directed to take our places.
Stanners gave one more punch to Vic’s arm. “Arteaga, you haven’t changed at all since college. Remember that Chi Alpha ski trip?” He whistled. “That night alone should have put a few years on you.” When Stan laughed, I thought of a sea lion.
The next few minutes left me breathless and full of questions as we were decorated with lapel mics, given the run-down of the four-minute interview, and encouraged to relax! Not to worry! Only five million people were watching! This fact was followed closely by another sea lion laugh.
A sizeable crowd had gathered outside a line of portable fencing separating them from the filming area. Production assistants wearing headsets and badges raised their clipboards in a sudden rush of forced enthusiasm, and the crowd responded with whoops and hollers. The cameraman closest to us held his hand under the teleprompter and motioned for three, two, one, then a finger pointing to Bunny.
“Welcome back, Seattle,” Bunny said, waiting appreciatively for the shouts of adulation to continue while the clipboard people jumped up and down like rabid cheerleaders. “What a great crowd here in the Emerald City!”
This educed another wave of shouting and general giddiness. I smiled at a spot beyond the camera, trying to glean some relaxed joy from a woman in the front row of bystanders. She waved a fluorescent green sign that said, SAY WA? SEATTLE LOVES RISE AND SHINE!
Stan waved to the crowd and said with all earnestness, “A little liquid sunshine won’t keep these good folks away!”
Bunny nodded and grinned at the rain that had started to fall beyond our protective canopy. A row of perfectly trimmed blond bangs framed her forehead. “So true! So true! Stan, I am so excited to have a convo with our next guests. Can you believe how lucky we are to have these two with us this morning?”
Stan gave a low chuckle, remarkably different from the sea lion approach. “Bunny, as always, you are 100 percent on the money. We are lucky indeed to welcome to the show today two illustrious chefs and the stars of a new reality show on Surge TV. Charlie Garrett and Avery Michaels, welcome.”
“Thanks!” Avery said, his hands gripping his knees, a wide smile pushing his cheeks high enough to make his eyes squint. “Honored to be here.”
I smiled and said hello. “Thank you for having us.”
Bunny began. “So? Are you so, so excited for the debut of Thrill Me this weekend?”
“Great name, great name,” Stan said in his sonorous voice. “Catchy.”
I saw Vic do a fist bump behind the camera.
“Totally excited. Honored. Blessed. Humbled. Stoked.” Avery appeared to be caught in some sort of one-word vortex.
Bunny tried another volley. “Now, you two have known each other a long time, right? Charlie, is it true that you and Avery went to culinary school together?”
“Yes, we both attended the Culinary Institute of America in Hyde Park.” I tried one of Stan’s low laughs on for size but it came across as a little skanky. I quickly cleared my throat. “A long time ago.”
Bunny threw back her head in a giggle, but her hair didn’t move. “I can hardly believe it was that long ago, my dear. You’re a spring chicken! But talk to me about a long time ago, and I’ll be picking up what you’re putting down!”
Avery roused. “You look great. Bunny. Super. Awesome.”
I saw a flicker of hesitation in Stan’s eyes, but it was gone as fast as it had appeared. “You two are a dynamite pair, you know that? I’ve watched some of the footage from Thrill Me, and …” He shook his head and raised two groomed eyebrows. “Can we talk about the heat?”
Bunny shook her head and tsked. “No kidding, Stan. How do you two keep up that pace in the kitchen, night after night?”